Any military folk out there struggle to maintain relationships?

[Anonymous]

Im still active service army, I find when I'm in uniform and around others in uniform, I'm on top of my game, confident and very extrovert.

But when im not on duty and talking to civilians, I feel a lack of confidence, I feel like I'm more of an annoyance and I'm desensitised to a lot of issues and problems.

Its impacted relationships heavily. Generally women are attracted to the uniform but then don't want to stay for what comes with it. The long hours, the priorities of work over them, the deployment of training missions or operations.

Is anyone else struggling? Or am I the only one?

Has everyone except me just already found the perfect military partners and is loving life 😄

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

My boyfriend is active duty, he usually had the same trouble, not really any different with or without uniform but he lacked a lot of confidence before meeting me.
I stick around for the long hours he has work and I respect it.


It’s hard for many guys to find relationships in the military. Most are either spouses from before military or ones who are willing to get married immediately and get the benefits and deployed with them (sorry, just an observation lol).
Most of the time, it’s difficult for people to adjust to the military lifestyle. It isn’t easy, espeically if you’re one to get deployed often. It’s not something many people want to deal with, especially if you’ve only been dating for a little while.

[Asker]

Glad to hear a success story, maybe there is hope for me yet haha

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

There is always hope. I think it just takes a patient person to be able to handle the lifestyle.

[Dinklex3]

Is there a specific reason why you want to date civilians instead of active duty personnel? Or even guard or reservist who understand your situation?
You'd think the civilians surrounding base would be knowledgeable and understanding. I grew up around Ft Drum. A lot of people were in longterm relationships with the soldiers.
For me, the only reason why I haven't been in long term relationships is because I've been oconus.

[Anonymous]

My experience in uniform was to forget getting married and kids simply because military wives ain't loyal. I so many guys who came back from a tour to find s mystery baby that couldn't possibly be theirs or wife was playing around with multiple guts or she took the kids to live with another man in another state cleaning out their savings and property.
On deployment women in the military are even worse even the married with kids ones, some of the women I served with were having sex with multiple guys 2-3 times per day.

[artstatues]

No, I don't any military people, but I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling
There's someone out there for everyone

[Anonymous]

I am former military and no it didn’t effect me.

[Iron_Man]

No I don’t have a girlfriend at this time

[In_Trance]

I think all of them do