So I'm on bumble they claim more guys on this site want to find a relationship than on tinder. I've been knocked on tinder and was optimistic about trying something new. First few guys I really tried with. I looked at their profile looking for little things to comment on. The 24 hour timer died out and one guy actually deleted his account.
So unfortunately I've just resorted to the boring and simple standard, hi... Name... How are you? At the bottom there you can see I made it past the 24 hour stage and was hopeful but even he's gone cold. It's a standard question, wth is actually going on?
I only used dating apps for 3 months following my divorce and met with over a dozen women and went on 18 dates... I am not talking about desperate ugly women either. There were no hook ups or casualness about any of it. These were professional and independent women. Eventually I meet my current girlfriend and we have been dating for over 6 months and she comes to my place every weekend and stays with me. So do not believe these people that say dating apps do not work, you just have to know how to use them. Every opportunity is chance to improve upon you self and then figure out how best to use the tool that is given.
I never used Bumble, but I used Match, Tinder, Zoosk and Eharmony. Eharmony was a joke honestly I didn't like it at all, but wouldn't you know my current girl friend was found on Eharmony. I just logged in one day after being off the plate form for weeks. I saw that this Red Head I was watching was actually on line for the first time in months, so I messaged her. She said she literally was only logged in to delete the profile, when my message came in and she decided to reply for the heck of it because she had 2 days remaining on her subscription before she planned on canceling it... and things went from there.
The biggest challenge is getting women to reply to you. They usually ignore you, so as a guy you have to cast a very wide net. I never talked or chatted with more than 1 or 2 women at a time... and once I started talking to more than 2 I usually dropped one. If I was actually meeting someone I usually maintained contact with the 2nd one and if I decided to drop the first one I would come back to the 3rd one. So I always had two women in play, because you never know it the first one was going to work out or not.
So if your losing the Match after the first 24 hours there's a good chance he still working through his list. At first I was checking my apps daily, but once I had more than one or two dates lined up I could go days without checking it. I don't have to tell you, that there are tons of undesirable men on these platforms... and most get no interest in women. But good guys, with better than average looks and strong profiles and stable income do a lot better then most people think... so 24 hours to connect with someone all depends on timing.
Without seeing your dating profile I can't really tell you what's wrong with it, but you need to do a lot of reading and studying on what a good profile should look like, and how it should read. For me it took a lot of trial and error to get the right type of profile to attract the types of women I was interested in. Know the settings and set your search criteria, I would get women all the time that were interested in me, that were over 100 miles away from me. If they were more than 50 miles away I ignored them.
why not try one of the better on line dting sites where you have to pay to join. That way it really cuts down on people just looking for hook ups, and most are serious about being in a relationship. Ehoemony, it's just lunch and I'm sure there are others. I live in a rural area so there was just no one around, and I didn't do the bar thing. Eharmony worked well for me, it was still a lot of work, looking at profiles, emailing etc, as finding the right person can be like a job, but we celebrated our 4th anniversary in Feb.
Stop with the generic conversation and actually show them that you've looked at that profile. Ask them something about what's there. Throw some things out to see what sticks.
You just have to keep trying I am your hope that bumble relationships work out because that is how I found my boyfriend of two years and the love of my life
I think the general consensus is that dating apps are garbage these days. We're also told as men that none of the wonen are serious on these apps anyway and most are just bored trying to pass some time. I also have other reasons for hating dating websites, after an exceptionally bad encounter years ago. Ill tell you about it if you want to hear it.
It's ok I've put it on here before. This was around 18 years ago, before the apps were around it was just websites. Anyway I matched with a girl and we got talking and agreed to meet in a hotel bar for a drink. Things were going really well on the date and as thr night was drawing to a close, she suggested we get a room. I was a little apprehensive as I really don't do that on first dates, well I definitely don't now. So i agreed, we got to the room and she said she was going to the bathroom to freshen up and to to get myself ready on the bed. Obviously I obliged by stripping down naked. A couple of minutes go by why am I here ear the door click, to find that she had let three guys in and slipped out. I proceeded to beat the absolute living shit out of me and robbed me of everything I had. So yeah all along it was a setup up, and I have never used dating apps or websites ever since. I now don't ever meet anybody I have met online, and I'm overly protective of my identity as well now.
Wish I knew, I'm one of the many guys on Bumble that keep swiping waiting for someone to match and not getting anything at all, so at least you're matching and trying.
Can't see much from the screenshot, but the profile pics do look varied so at least it's not a particular type of person you keep going for.
TBH like a lot of people have commented, modern dating is ruining things for everyone across the board but I wish you luck with your search.
I like men, generally speaking I try and see how things go. I have had a few guys give some responses but it's tough. Some answer questions and they disappear. I dunno what to say really. Say hi how are you wasn't so great. I tried with the question thing instead. It's proven more successful. I also stopped swiping and now I'm premium I wanna know who likes me and see how things go from there. It's tough when guys show the side of their faces. Or the back of their head!
Suppose you have the advantage in that sense on Bumble, I don't end up with much of a "beeline", as they call it, so premium has never seemed worth it to look at two profiles and find out both are incompatible or I'm looking at pictures I've seen before on a different profile (indicating scam) which happened when I did sign up on a week long trial offer.
It's tough. I find for me personally after being hurt the way I was in the past I just want to find someone anyone. So long as we get on. Things I won't compromise on. Smoking, fixated on one music genre, photos with dogs and babies that aren't theirs, Skiing and photos of highly luxurious holidays... I want a humble person. Some guys are rude. Some guys are shy. I'm giving one guy a second chance by letting him know I am actually shy. If he doesn't respond or make the effort I'll just forget about it. Some of the others I kind of feel like after that first initial chat they should just be trying to get you to know me. Even if it's just sharing basic casual things to say about their day.
I'm sorry that you're struggling like this. It's hard, I know.
Finding out you got a like because you're not ugly but they don't actually want to date you isn't fun. But scammers is worse. What are your photos like on your profile?
Main one is the one I use here, I'll admit to one that does have me holding a puppy that's not mine (was working on cruise ships so was a photo from a husky ranch in Norway where they raise sled dogs, so technically a work/travel photo) the others are just similar to my main one in different outfits. Not really had the chance to get any activity photos, most of my activities are board games or tabletop RPGs.
I'll admit to being shy, but if someone expressed an interest in me I'd not be so shy as to not put in effort, the approach bit has been done, now it's a normal conversation. (that's why I thought Bumble would be a good fit, no approach anxiety if you're the one being theoretically approached)
I hear you. Well you have added a variety of photos. I don't want to tell you what to do. Because I truly believe it has to be authentically you. But I would recommend when you can get an activity shot. If a friend can take it, not posed when your deep in a game. I think that will be good. Posed photos lack emotion. Women look for different things to men.
I've matched with a few here and honestly it's slow. But I sense the slowness is because they want more than just sex. So that's a good thing.
Well, when I used Bumble, all the women would say when initially contacting me was "Hi". That's it. Fortunately, I am quite used to striking up convos, so it didn't bother me. I never met any of the women with whom I had less than scintillating convos, but did have dates with some interesting professional women and one became my girlfriend.
There are more low quality people than high quality people so you have to sift through the weeds. You can't expect a high quality person to find you. They are in the same situation you are in.
Bumble, is a dating app I feel most guys get bored of. You just sit there waiting for a female to make the first move but they never do, and when they do, if it doesn't seem like she's interested the guy might take that hint and go cold. Most female accounts on dating apps tend to be scammers anyways, seems like you're talking to someone real nice and the give you a snapchat to some porn Snapchat or they ask for money or their accounts are deleted before you can reply.
Sex is very important for me so yes thats the first thing on my list i have to check. If others are okey living sexless relationships good for them, not my taste.
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