Best way to convince my man that I am not dating my boss?

[Gloree]

My boss got me a pair of pants trousers for my birthday. I showed it to my boyfriend with excitement but noticed he wasn't happy with me. He was questioning how the man knew my size and if he was making advances at me. My boyfriend works in thesame office as me though different buildings so we see often.
I explained it wasn't my size as I had to give it to a tailor to reduce the hips and waist before it fit. He managed to understand.
Later, my boss's wife got me an anklet after I admired the one on her leg. My boyfriend didn't like it as he perceives the woman might be gay. And I should stay away from her. We managed to get over this.
Now my boss got me a scarf. I had to hide this one because I didn't want any issues. Then my boss got me a dress and I would have hidden it but my boyfriend walked in as I was leaving my boss's office with the gift. He got mad again with suspicion but I explained my boss is just fond of me and we managed to settle.
Then last week, my boss got me coffee he got from overseas. I was about to put it in my bag when my boyfriend entered and saw it cause he came to get me for lunch. This caused another session of questioning. How did he know I love coffee. So we chat and talk on phone? Etc etc. I tried to explain but he is very furious, asking what do I want? Isn't he doing enough? Etc etc. I have never seen him so furious. I know my boss is harmless but he feels the man is looking for something. Is he not being unfair? I mean, my boss is about 62. Why is he threatened? And how do I convince him that I'm not messing around? After all, he already knows I'm still a virgin so he should not have any issues with my boss. I need advice cause this thing is causing a strain in my relationship. It's not like I can tell my boss to stop giving me gifts, come on. Please, I need some advice.

[noamazia]

first of all, if your boss is giving you gifts and that causes trouble, you can tell him that you can't accept them or that it is inappropriate anymore.
if you don't want to refuse the gifts, then you need to get your boyfriend on the same page. not about a specific gift, but about the whole picture.
from what you wrote, your boyfriend and boss know each other, and you and your boss are also friends that talk outside of work, or at least chat during work.
have you had a lunch with your boyfriend and boss at the same time? so he can see your dynamic. to see that you are friends. worst case scenario, make him ask your boss outright "are you interested in/making moves on my girlfriend?" when they are alone. that is to make him understand your boss's intentions or place in your life.

the other problem is how he sees your relationship, that he is insecure enough to think you might throw him away. that is a treaky thing to handle and you need to have a few long conversations about your relationship, safety, commitment and so on. maybe even go to couple counseling.

sorry if my comment wasn't clear. it was hard for me to order my thoughts in a way that translates well to a written form. personally, i think it is your boyfriend insecurities/paranoia (that might be induced by the way you talk/interact with your boss) and that shouldn't stop you from recieving gifts if you are close with your boss.

[Gloree]

I deeply appreciate your contribution. thanks.

[spartan55]

"It's not like I can tell my boss to stop giving me gifts"... uh you can decline his gifts which is what you should have done from the start. You are incredibly naive. 34 year old virgin eh... riiight

[Gloree]

You are sounding like my boyfriend already. How can I decline a gift? A harmless quality present. What if it offends my boss and I spoil my relationship with him as secretary? This is unfair. And yeah right I am who I am. It is no big deal. Appreciate your opinion a lot.

[spartan55]

You just don't get it. This is bothering your boyfriend, hurting him. And all you can do is make rationalizations for your boss... hopefully your boyfriend will wise up and leave you.

[Shamalien]

I think it is inappropriate to get this many gifts and such personal gifts from your boss. I think you need to simply have a talk with your boss and say that you do appreciate them, but you simply cannot accept any more. You can tell him that it makes you uncomfortable, WHICH IT SHOULD

[Anonymous]

'It's not like I can tell my boss to stop giving me gifts'

Yes you can...

'I mean, my boss is about 62'

Us older men can be very attractive. Is he?

However, he does not trust you so this will not work.

[Gloree]

If I tell him to stop giving me gifts, It will be rude.

Yes, he is very attractive but that don't mean I will follow him. He has never made advances at me. He is just only fond of me.

He does trust me but hates my boss because of this gifting thing.

[Opinion Owner]

There are many ways of telling someone to stop doing something without being rude. If he trusted you, he wouldn't have been asking you probing questions. He would have only focused on the Boss's behavior.

By not telling the Boss to stop, you aren't enforcing any boundaries. The fact that you feel no reason to do so is what your boyfriend is sensing.

If you don't want to feel the need to enforce boundaries then stay single...

[TrillXHippy]

Either you can tell your boss to stop or your boyfriend can. You continue to get gifts from another man despite how much it’s pissing off your boyfriend

[Anonymous]

You have a problem with your boss, whether you see it or not. And it's unfair to your man. If you don't do the right thing, you're going to lose him.