How to navigate in a modern dating world ?

[cth2188]

How do you guys date if you’re not modern?

[OlderAndWiser]

I try to be the gentleman that I have always tried to be, and if a lady does not like that, then she is not The One for me.

I am currently living with a girlfriend who I started dating in December, 2020. Before that, I met women online, I told them that I preferred to meet in person relatively soon but did not want to pressure them. When they were ready, I invited her to dinner and made reservations at a nice restaurant that was upscale but not over-the-top. In my generation, the guy pays for everything on a date and the money is not an issue for me so she gets treated like a queen (but, ultimately, I expect to be treated like a king.)

I meet her at the restaurant, offer her a glass of wine but clearly do not try to get her drunk, we share a nice meal, and if the night is going well, I invite her to adjourn to the restaurant's lounge for an after-dinner drink. At the end of the evening, I walk her to her car and, if it feels right, I give her a brief goodnight kiss on the lips.

This scenario usually results in a second date. If it doesn't. . . it simply wasn't meant to be and I am talking to someone else to arrange my next first date.

If it results in a second date, we do something equally nice. By the end of the third date, I usually know if this is a woman who is a realistic possibility for a long term relationship. If not, I move on to someone else. If she is a prospect, I ask how she feels at that point and whether she is interested in dating exclusively. And there we go!

That's how I navigate. I have many young men tell me that this "clearly" would not work with their generation. However, the fact that they are having problems with dating makes me suspect that they are seriously misreading the young ladies they try to court.

[jennifer_bloom]

I have a tip I got from my cousin - she says, guys and girls rate you based on your behaviour and disposition and not on your natural physical traits - I know ugly guys who act like their the hottest thing alive and they always get girls way smarter and better looking then them and I know good looking people with no confidence who get almost no attention from the opposite gender.