Why does she keep reaching out?

[joe2511]

This girl I was dating for a few months keeps reaching out after stating she "needed to work on herself" aka code for not being interested a few weeks ago. When we were together, we made plans to do this yearly cider challenge at a local brewery. Whenever she reaches out it is about this cider challenge. I am curious why she keeps reaching out when her messages are extremely cold/dry (one-word answers) and doesn't want to meet up/flakey. Looking for any insights.

[jennifer_bloom]

It seems she likes you but is too shy to show it without you prodding her for more communication. Like she wants to bait you into a chase so she can act interested around you. Girls do this when they lack experience or when they are impressed and don’t want to show it.

[joe2511]

Interesting. I know she has had some emotionally abusive relationships in the past. I've tried striking up conversations, inviting her out to this event, and others with little success. She'll initially agree and then flake or "not feel well" and then disappear for a few days to a week. She'll then randomly message me, but it'll be one word answers and disappear. I am just trying to understand this behavior.

[jennifer_bloom]

She might have poor conversation skills and that could be a red flag for low emotional intelligence, like when I send emails to people, it reads like an article in a medical journal, cause I care about cultivating my conversation style. I would be doubtful of her.

[joe2511]

Yeah, I am keeping my distance from her at the moment. We only talk if she reaches out first. I'm not sure what's going on, but thanks for the insight.

[slatyb]

Would you like to see her at that event? That's the only decision you need to make.

[joe2511]

I'd be open to it. She just flakes out last minute whenever I invite her to that event or other activities.