Is it bad to tell my crush that other guy ask me out?

[Mao_Ren]

I've meeting my crush every weekend/ once every 2 weeks for about 8 months already. All my friends says that he obviously like me but He haven't confess to me (we are not official).

The other day, other guy ask me out. I rejected it because i only think him as a friend.

should I tell my crush about this? Or is it bad to tell him?

Since it's been almost 8 months and I don't know our status (friend or couple or what), I feel bad if I want to go out with my other guy friend (i don't want him think bad about me).

I don't have the courage to ask him out either.

[quaranta]

If he is committed to you, meeting regularly for 8 months and without getting other dates with girls, well, I definitely think he likes you, unless you have so really much in common (interests etc, anything that could motivate him to keep meeting constantly even if you were a guy) that he can just see you as a very good friend, but the fact you don't know if you are friends or a couple and the fact other friends of yours think he likes you, make me think he actually does.
I think it's really really time to talk about your feelings because you reached the point where you're already exclusive to him (you reject others) and most likely it would break your heart if he isn't exclusive the same as he was until now. But time goes and people keep meeting new people, sooner or later a more decisive girl could come across, and... Yeah.
Also, it's way worse to express your feelings in a desperate way out of jealousy and suffering, than in a confident and serene way before any of these triggers happen. It's not just "ugly" but declaring yourself in a desperate way, maybe crying, and with another girl in the middle, gives you objectively less chances, so don't wait to be forced in that situation to then potentially lose anything.
Likewise, don't force him to confess out of desperation. You can tell about this guy and that you rejected him because you see him only as a friend, like a random story of your week like many others, so that he doesn't get overtriggered but gets the message that do you receive contacts from guys and that he should hurry up somehow. Don't tell him you're considering to date this new guy or that you crush on him or anything like that (if it's not true, just to cause a reaction) otherwise he could shut down and then do something ugly.
Anyway given the situation, where he most likely reciprocates you (or at least "enough" to not be rejected), if you confess your feelings in a confident and serene way, without crisis and without getting your words pulled out by him and without being randomly crazy to mask your insecurity, making clear how you feel about him and what you want, well that's an attractive thing to do. Guys receive very few confessions, so if they get one and it's also presented in a mature and confident way, not desperate (and they know there is no hidden desperation behind, so like you haven't been obvious and clingy), they could get suddenly even more attracted than before. It can blow their mind. So beware of the power you have, and that you're still not making any use of that!
I say this by a very recent experience: I confessed a friend I developed feelings for in the last months of constant talking, explaining how they were grounded in many aspects of him I got to know over time, not just a blind infatuation. I thought I was friendzoned already but I decided to confess early anyway (before getting an actual full crush) just to keep things transparent between us and work things out if needed. I have been very direct, confident and clear, he was indeed seeing me as a friend but after my confession he rearranged his brain in 1 day, got flattered by the indirect compliments this means, got really horny and romantic all of a sudden. Most successful outcome I could ever imagine, considering I thought I was friendzoned!
If you look at your situation it's even easier if there are very good indicators he likes you back! So really consider confessing and in an impactful way.

[Mao_Ren]

Thank you for your opinion!
Actually we don't have many things in common.
We don't have similar circle of friends so the other day I ask him if he want to join me for dinner after work and he said yes. It's just one time thing but my friend say he obviously like me.
We don't have similar hobby or interest either, so he always bring me or suggest place that I might interest to do so (go to flowers park event, or lantern event, etc).
The rest on his holiday he spent time taking lesson but never mention meeting anyone in particular and work on weekdays. He was type of guy who do action than speak, very quiet in general but surprise me without saying anything (when we meet he always pay for everything and refused when I tell him I can pay half, or give me present, etc).

I will consider what you suggest but I personally very shy and don't have many experience when it comes to dating. I'm afraid I might ruin everything in the end.

[quaranta]

Well, if you have nothing in common but he keeps meeting you every 2 weeks for 8 months, there must be much more than just "being bored". I assume if you were a guy he wouldn't waste this time and he wouldn't be constant in that. He even pays for you so you're actually going on what dates are afterall... Something is boiling for sure... And he resisted 8 months without making a move, that means probably he likes you a lot, instead of moving on to someone else.
Look, you have a guy who likes you and who is probably ready to confess too, the chances to be reciprocated are very high. What could go wrong? What could you ruin? What you're having is not even an actual friendship you might "ruin", if you don't have things in common, it's a mild dating that is waiting to bloom...
He for sure, if he pays stuff and gives you presents, for sure is not expecting that you mean him as a friend-only, and that you're meeting from 8 months just for "friendship", while it's not based on common things. If you confess, he won't be like:"Omg I didn't know, I thought we were just good friends, sorry but I see you just like a sister", I mean...

[SeriouslyFunny00]

As long as you don't have a label or committed relationship, you don't owe him an explanation. Maybe you should give other guys a chance too? in my opinion, if a man doesn't give you a label in just 1-3 months of dating, he'll just string you along. You might as well be wasting time than meeting other potential candidates who will give you a defined relationship.

I strongly suggest to give other guys a chance. You know the line, “may the best man win”? Collect your candidates then choose wisely. 😉

[Mao_Ren]

Thank you for your opinion!
It's not that I didn't give the other guy chance,
I reject that guy because I think he isn't suitable for me in term of personality and he basically on different country (I live overseas).
And with the guy I'm frequently meeting, the first 1-3 month at that time we are not close and we don't communicate often. We only meet on like once or twice in 1 month so since we are not from same circle.
We kind of getting closer after know him for 5-6 months and start meeting him regularly.

[20yearsolder]

No it wouldn't be bad, maybe it'll get your crush to be a little more active. Maybe he'll want to see you more often

[Jamie05rhs]

No; it's not bad. Just don't make a big deal out of it.

[Anonymous]

Why would you tell him? What's the purpose of telling him? He isn't your boyfriend and he also has bothered to tell he likes you or ask you out, so why even say anything.

[Mao_Ren]

I want to tell him to see his reaction and what his answer.
By that I think I can know what his intention without being needy, I guess?

[Opinion Owner]

What are you trying to do see if he will get jealous or something well that's just dumb and will likely push him away because guys don't like girls playing dumb games. Your 28 years old grow up

Why push him to tell you how if feels if you yourself are too gutless to admit your own feelings for him to him. So damn childish the stupid games you play just to push a guy to admit he feels but at the same time your gutless to admit your own feeling or to even ask him out yourself. Why should the guy have to do all the work.

Well good luck to you but don't come crying if he gets annoyed at you playing childish games

[In_Trance]

Why would you?