How to find out about his past?

[katestar]

How to find out the truth about him?

[DaveJord]

First off I will say this, if you feel you absolutely have to find out the "truth" about anything when it comes to dating or relationship, then I say move on he/she is not the one. Your better off not knowing or going down this line of thought.

I say this because it implies that you can't just ask him/her because you already have this sense that they are not telling you something or being honest with you. If you can trust the other person, then it really doesn't matter what his/her past is... you need to move on and end it.

At this point your instincts are telling you something so you should trust them. Anything you find is really irrelevant to that fact. You find what you are looking for then what? Your feel vindicated so you end it, right? You don't find what you are looking for, then what? Will that be the end of if or will you just keep letting eating away from you. Even if you find the truth or don't find it, do you see yourself letting go of these feelings you are having or will that anxiety be forever present?

If you can't let it go now without trusting the person, then you really are never going to trust this person regardless, because you don't trust them now. And if its not this thing it will be something else later down the the line.

[katestar]

Well. If I have to move on. I don't get to ask him some questions. And I don't get to tell him that I'm in love with him. And besides that. I think that he's a sweet and funny guy. And he's honest.

[DaveJord]

Then why do care about his past, if he is all. those things to you... then talk to him, ask him. Other than asking him, listening to him and accepting what he tells you... why do you care more then that?

[katestar]

Because I care about him. He's just a friend.

[katestar]

He's more than just a friend. I'm just trying to figure out how I feel about him. I'm doing this because I care about him.

[DaveJord]

Okay I took it as if you were already dating him, but you're not?

Just talk to him, say hi and start a conversation... and then ask him the questions you want to know.

Other then talking to him, don't go around snooping him on social media or asking others about him. I mean that stuff gets back round to the person, and dudes find it creepy AF when chick's do that.

[katestar]

Um. Okay. I'll do that. And he will be my boyfriend soon

[DaveJord]

Good luck, but with guys and women when you choose to get involved with someone, your are doing that based upon the person they claim to be and are as of today. You become to hung up on their past and it puts women and men off. People like me have no problem being transparent about my past because I have nothing to hide, but with that said some women wanted to get hung up on it... then she can take a hike because i don't need that type of person in my life.

So take it slow and go easy... do not come on too strong or push to hard at first give the relationship time to breath and then over a few weeks you should know everything you need to know. Then if you are not happy with his answers or can't feel as you can trust him, go back to my very first response and move on.

[katestar]

I won't move on.

[DaveJord]

Then his past is irrelevant honestly so don't worry about it, if you will not move on regardless of the chase... then it does not matter. That's my point, it doesn't matter so don't stress it.

[exitseven]

Use the internet, if you have a friend in aw enforcement see it he has a criminal record. Follow him home from work sometime to see if he is married of has a girlfroend.

[katestar]

He's innocent

[exitseven]

How do you really know.

[katestar]

Because I know him better. I grew up with him. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He's single He's sweet. Funny. thoughtful. Talented. Caring. And really handsome

[exitseven]

so why do you want to find out about him?

[katestar]

Because I care about him

[exitseven]

Thanks for the MHO😎

[Anonymous]

Ask questions

See if he has any social media accounts.

[katestar]

He did Facebook and Instagram.

[Reddy4it]

Discussions…trust…relationship

[katestar]

Really?

[katestar]

That's a good advice

[Reddy4it]

Thank you…

[clampfan101]

Get to know him and other people that know him well. Ask questions. Trying to learn in secret won’t be good for either of you.

[katestar]

Or his grandmother?

[clampfan101]

If she’s someone who knows him well I don’t see why not. You’re going to want to try to get to know him directly before anyone else, though.

[katestar]

He's single.

[clampfan101]

That’s good, but it doesn’t change any of my advice. lol

[katestar]

It doesn't

[msc545]

It seems as if you don't trust your own judgment, which means you won't trust any man. Get some help.

[Heolurt]

Become a detective or join a government secret service.

[katestar]

I'm going to be a detective.

[katestar]

So. Um. Why did you help me with this?

[Heolurt]

Well in that case, you're not going to be a good one if you couldn't see the answer right in front of you.

[Anonymous]

Ask his friends, and talking to him could help.

[katestar]

Really? That could help.

[Opinion Owner]

Sure it can.

[Berethor]

Hire a private investigator. :)

[katestar]

Or maybe I should just do it

[Jennz6]

Goggle him?

[katestar]

I've tried that. It says that he's a actor.