New boyfriend is 18 and I’m 24 next month but he sounds so mature. Can we make it work still?

[Paulalove98]

Updates

+1 y

He is more mature than most 18 year olds I've met and he has a decent job,& cares about his family

[RomanticRealist]

I side eye age gaps like this, tbh. You're an adult and he's just out of high school.

Having said that, I get it. I've been involved with younger men and at your age I had situations of what I called "puppy dog crushes." I wasn't open to those potential connections because I was closed off on serious relationships in general. Their ages would have been issues for me, but who's to say I wouldn't have done it. I can think of a couple where I was into them back, but had my walls up.

And if you're already together, then you need to choose whether or not the age gap is a deal breaker for you. If you don't accept it and trust him and the process, it's going to be a point of anxiety and concern for you that will wear on you mind and may disrupt your connection. If you think the connection is a problem that can't be overcome, you should break things off. If you want to put your all into it, I think you're going to have to become more comfortable with the idea and confident about your situation. Age may affect your relationship, especially as he grows up and changes. But for now, you can only choose to trust him, nurture a strong connection, get to know who he is on a deeper level, and see what happens. None of our relationships are guaranteed. If only those crystal balls did work! Alas...

[KelleyNice]

Do you think he might look for someone younger?

[Paulalove98]

To be honest he said he tried dating girls his age but they didn't take him seriously and he thinks an older girl like me will and honestly I will because i want something serious and have experienced those life experiences and relationships as I've gotten older. He said his limit with dating was up to women 45 years of age

[KelleyNice]

If the relationship survives a few years, the age difference will not matter. My only concern is his dating age limit. I wouldn't be concerned if it was 25 and not much if it was 30. However, if his dating limit is 45, in my opinion, something is not right or at least that would make me wonder. However, perhaps 45 is just talk and his true limit is more realistic.

[KelleyNice]

Thanks for the MH.

[hahahmm]

In my experience, if a relationship doesn't work out it is because the woman started acting nuts -- I'm not saying all women do but the point is that most dudes are easy going & not THAT demanding. Question is if you are going to make him question his own sanity or not.

The other thing is you'd be wise to become an expert in keeping healthy, being fit and that sort of thing because in the long run your competition will still be 18-25... even when you're 35. Those numbers don't look good for you unless you have way, way, way more to offer than the other 4 billion women out there. Every bit helps.

I didn't mention character because you seem to already be aware of that side of things.

[Paulalove98]

I plan to take care of myself very well as I have been now and in the future. I also have good genes in my family and stay active as possible! I appreciate the input. My sister actually found love at 43 after a divorce and her boyfriend is 37. My current boyfriend says he will still like me and find me attractive even when I’m 30 in 6 years and he said he would’ve went up to dating a woman who’s 45 lol.

[DenizLikesTennis]

Hey there👋

I am confronted with the same situation but only I am 26 and she is 19 - sounds mature, the chemistry is super great etc. You can feel it. I met her at work. So I am thinking like to keep her as a friend without to be suspected.

And I have texted her that I'd make her feel very uncomfortable because I am like 7 years older - the gap is huge. And she said: "as long as we're friends and not official, then it's all good in the hood".

Well I guess, there is your answer. BUT YOU ARE LUCKY! Why? Because older women and younger men is tolerating. So yeah

Enjoy spending time with him... who the heck cares these days. Unless he is 12-13 years old.

[OlderAndWiser]

There's only one way to know for sure.

[RangerBlue22]

That’s not very common but if your both happy then I don’t judge.

Some younger men can be more idealistic and pure when dating women. But similar to women they can get bitter/pessimistic when they encounter setbacks. But it sounds like he’s a decent kid.

[RangerBlue22]

Also for age gap relationships I would recommend waiting at the bare minimum 2 months before you say this is “official”. More likely 3.

Reason being there are some unique challenges here for both of you. But if you can make it past 3 months then there is something solid.

I dated a 20 year old when I was 34 for nine months. I did not expect it to last in the beginning given the age gap. But she stuck with me and fell in love (for a time). I was nervous about announcing it as official. I felt a bit nervous about people judging me. Although older guys with younger girls relationships are more common modern society often likes to trash men as “creeps”. But it worked great while it lasted.

I recommend you DM me if you want more advice.

[ZackBan]

Yeah you could. I was also one of those early to maturity guys who always spoke older than my own age and honestly I've dated older girls before the age was never a deciding factor.

If or not you work depends on what you're both looking for and willing to go for in a relationship.

[Caps_d_ed]

You can. It can get difficult at times depending on what you want from life at the moment, but he's mature enough and you're mature enough not to ruin it for stupid reasons, why should it not work!

[Paulalove98]

He said he's been with girls his age but most of them haven't treated him maturely enough and he wants a girl who will take him seriously so he likes that im older and thinks i would do so and i definitely have experience and want something serious too. He also has a steady job for his age he's just saving for a car.

[Caps_d_ed]

That sounds great then. To some extent, I can relate to what he said as well. It sucks when people your age do not treat or value you like you should be.

[tzdc21]

Sure you can make it work. So what if you're older than him? Big deal. Real important things you should be asking is, "Does he care about me?" "Do I care about him?" "Do we both want to make this work?" If the answer is yes for those three questions then that's all that matters.

[SnowedIn]

Yes. It has nothing to do with how he sounds and everything to do with both of you choosing to communicate and choosing mature responses to each other. You can absolutely make that age gap work.

[Th3ft]

I mean if he is mature and you do really like him then it could work. Don’t know. Good luck though!!

[thisluvv]

Let’s be real. If a guy said he was 24 and dating a girl who isn’t even 18 yet, everyone would call him an pedophile, creep, etc. so why is it acceptable when a female does it?

[Paulalove98]

I wouldn't say he's a pedo unless he's like above 30 like 35 and the girl is a legal adult cause if he's that old then yeah but you hear about it ALL the time literally older men with younger women and people are like ehh at this point but gee are some of the haters possibly intimated that the older woman can still look hot at 28 or 30 even my age and pass for 18 just happening to fall for someone that age?

[Paulalove98]

Sorry not sorry i just happened to be attracted to guys with younger faces and im not hurting anyone by doing so as long as he's an ADULT thats all that matters & no before you try to call me out again lol.. i dont just like younger guys for sex, thats why i waited a long time to do it. I literally just dont want a man whos 30 and not attracted to men with facial hair or partied (been around) majority of the time when do you hear about a genuine love story of a man THAT old really loving a younger woman besides the stability such as money and sex in the relationship? I can go on so go ahead:) I actually desire the emotions and passion of a relationship with a guy a few years younger because i like video games like a 19 year old would, i like amusment parks, the arcades, fairs etc and age is literally only a number as long as their adults even if i am 24 and the guy is even 21 for example. Have a good day

[Fireguy17]

It can, it's only 6 years.

Granted women mature faster than men, but as long as you have stuff in common it shouldn't be an issue.

[Avicenna]

Maybe. Your ages aren't what matters since you're both adults- it's your compatibility.

[Guardian45]

Sorry, but I am skeptical. Although there is only 6 years between you, those years span eons in age differences usually between the genders. So, I'll say Good Luck and I wish you the best! I'll pray for you.😁

[TT1227]

I mean he is an adult after all so I don’t see what the problem is.

[FunkyMonkee]

I don't see why you can't. My first girlfriend & I were in the same situation (ages reversed)

[FunkyMonkee]

Like I said, she was more mature than most 18 year olds I knew back then.

[BLP11520]

I think you might , keep your head. You are more mature and understand life more than he does at his current age.. I am on your side , hope it works.

[Datboi65]

Maybe you wanna google Brittany Renner and read her story, because it's very relevant to your situation.

[Sixgunsound]

If you stay together long term, that difference will matter less as you both have more years behind you.

[loveslongnails]

"Can" it happen? Sure, it's possible. Is it "probable"? The smart money bets against it, but so what? Doesn't mean you shouldn't go for it.

[art84]

You should give it a shot and it might work out.

[OddBeMe]

Sounds like you are.

I generally say no to that large an age gap (as if I have any authority)…but sometimes it works.

The issue really is 25 yr olds getting young teens to date them because their pervs.

[Anonymous]

My brother in law is 8 years younger than my sister and they've been together for as long as I can remember. He was always very mature. We still joke that he's been 30 since he was 17

[Robbey]

If you like him and you feel he’s mature, then why not give him a chance?

[ohsheeT]

That's going to be up to you guys you get out of it what you put into it

[Twalli]

Yeah. 6 years isn't a huge difference. My girlfriend is almost 5.5 years older than me.

[AddylynnNightingale]

Has the age gotten in your way so far?

[Jong1995]

I don't think it will be an obstacle in a serious love life, I wish you happiness until the last days of their lives unless there are big numbers. 🙏

[AddylynnNightingale]

@Jong1995 No. She needs to answer. People have to learn to think for themselves.

[Jong1995]

Of course, I think he hasn't seen it, he has to answer when he sees you're 🙏 right.

[Paulalove98]

@AddylynnNightingale no it hasn't.

[AddylynnNightingale]

Then just keep doing what you're doing.

[Paulalove98]

@AddylynnNightingale he wants something serious like me and doesn't mind me being older than him, he thinks Ill take him more serious than a girl his age.

[exitseven]

If the both of you are happy then that is all that matters

[fonduegirl]

Of course. Don't let age gap define your relationship.

[TheSpaceGnome]

An age gap that small will have zero impact. What matters is what you have in common.

[glennos89]

Only time will tell once you get to know eachother better

[BJP21]

Steady as she goes, hold coarse until he pops the question. If you're both happy let him put a ring on it. Happy life.

[Havthrills]

You can. Are you having an issue about his age?

[Hardworkingguy]

I believe that maturity comes differently for everyone so the age does not determine how intelligent or mature you are so it's worth giving it a shot

[chocomilk99]

Damn who approached who

[Paulalove98]

He approached me.

[chocomilk99]

And u said yes

[chocomilk99]

I think i am living in old times... n everyone else is moved forwad lol

[Paulalove98]

Haha maybe? But he said he really really likes me and hasn’t felt this way about a girl in a long time as I haven’t felt this way about a guy in a long time either.

[hafinjun]

Maybe but I think the sex won't be enough, good luck to you both

[Fromdusktilldawn]

Lol believe me, guys do anything in that age only for sex. But you'll find out soon enough

[MiseriaCantareAFI]

no. i don't even approve of it in the first place

[Anonymous]

Yes it will work! If not I am waiting in the wings for you :) that's a promise!

[Wise4myage]

Of course, why do you think it can't?

[Wise4myage]

That sounds good.

[Pleaznhim4me]

Can you bang him? Then yes!!!

[pizzalovershouse]

If you have enough in common

[Blackcupcake]

yes you can

[Celticwolf78]

Nope because he wants to have a body count

[maximumpower]

Why not?

[AllGoodNamesRGone]

Hbday in advance 🎉

[Jamesshinobi]

i doubt it.

[Jamie05rhs]

Maybe.

[Luopio27]

Go for him.

[Debbie14217]

yes for sure

[Dinosaursandanime65]

Of course you can

[jimmy2]

Yes you can