Girls: how would you feel if you planned a date with a guy and he didn’t even mention going on that date the entire day of?

[Anonymous]

[DevikaButts95]

Kinda depends on context, but some people don't like to share their moves so I wouldn't really care.

[Asker]

So you wouldn’t be upset if a guy you were going on a date with , that same day never mentioned or asked what the plans were for that date?

[DevikaButts95]

Ohhhhhh that's what you meant.
I mean did you try and talk to him? Does he know you're planning it?
Does he know what time to meet you?
'Cause it's still dependent on factors and context.

[Asker]

We both decided to do something this past Saturday. I initiated that conversation days before and then Saturday shows up and he didn’t even remotely mention a date nor apologize for disregarding our plans. I didn’t mention it to him because I felt like I shouldn’t have had to considering I initiated the idea of us even seeing each other this week

[DevikaButts95]

If someone did that to me (from like his perspective), I might think they lost interest personally. Usually if I make plans, I reiterate the plans like a day before.
I mean there's a whole slew of reasons he mighta just not responded.

[Asker]

I took it as disinterest honestly. We haven’t seen each other in three weeks.(for two weeks he was sick)

[DevikaButts95]

It's not necessarily disinterest though, there's a whole slew of reasons. Especially if they're younger too, I find younger tend to think like this.
I mean did you try to contact him day of?
'Cause I don't know, a better signal that someone is disinterested is they never make any initiative to make any plans with you, or ignore you day of if you contact them, but if you initiated and then never brought it up again they might have wanted to see you and there was just miscommunication.

[Asker]

We messaged each other back and fourth a few times that day. He didn’t mention anything even once of us seeing each other that day. I’ve been the one initiating our plans and finally hat past Saturday I chose not to bring it up first.

[DevikaButts95]

So you didn't bring it up at all?

[Asker]

Nope didn’t feel like I needed to. I feel like interest in seeing each other should be mutual and not just solely on one person asking all the time

[DevikaButts95]

That's true if you always do it then I think just going quiet and seeing if he messages you anymore is a good play.
BUT I will also say that again, if you made the plans and didn't mention them at all on Saturday, I might also just not say anything thinking you forgot.

[Asker]

Too late, I ended things between us. I took him making me initiate the plans all the time as a sign of disinterest. I’ve told him before that inconsistency in my point of view is a sign of disinterest

[DevikaButts95]

Oh then yea power to you! New and better awaits! And good that you told him, he'll learn and move on.
How old was he, if I may ask?

[Asker]

He was 24. I’m going to be 25 in two weeks.

[DevikaButts95]

Well I hope the next guy puts in better effort towards you!! You deserve it!!

[Guy13]

That’s not very smart of him. You sure you want to have babies and family with that guy ⁉️

[DevikaButts95]

The fuck?

[Asker]

He’s right though. Why would I want to have a kid with someone like this?

[DevikaButts95]

It's just a really fucking weird way of wording it.

[Asker]

Ehhh not really. It’s a truthful thought. Why would I want those things with someone that doesn’t show up for me right now?

[Guy13]

Thanks for getting what I am saying... I am assuming the other girl disliked the post.. Did the date work out?

[Asker]

No it didn’t lol I ended up telling him we should just leave our situation alone and he flat out ghosted after shifting blame on me for him waking up to that text when in reality he ignored my text up until the morning

[Guy13]

At least you have good sense and can walk away from Trouble... You ever do www.meetup.com

[Flower7]

I would bring it up.

[Asker]

I ended up telling him we need to leave our situation alone lol

[Jamie05rhs]

This is a dumb thing to worry about.

[Asker]

No it’s not. It goes to show whether or not a guy actually cares for you and puts you into priority of his time and thinks about you.

[Jamie05rhs]

No. I call bullshit on that. If the guy was messaging you the day of, you would be calling him "clingy."

[Asker]

No I wouldn’t because he’s been messaging me everyday for the past 3 months. I don’t like to play games with people

[Jamie05rhs]

Okay. That's good. You must be one of the sane ones.

[Asker]

Yeah unfortunately

[Brando10222]

He's not into you but just sees you as a friend

[Asker]

I asked him if he has lost interest in that way and he said he didn’t

[Brando10222]

Always remember one thing that actions speak louder than words.

[Asker]

Absolutely but he has had chance after chance to also say how he feels. I’m open to honesty.

[Brando10222]

Read your question again. You have your answer. If he was into you fully he would have replied. Cause guys love when a girl plans the date or asks for it.

[Asker]

I asked initially but left it up to him to bring up and ask what we were doing on Saturday. He did say his stomach was hurting him but I’m disappointed that he never even mentioned the date that day. Yes I am aware he isn’t fully interested and that is why I left him behind. I’m leaving it up to him to fix things if he truly wants to, or I am moving on.

[Andinara]

then you can mention to him

[Asker]

Nope. I shouldn’t have to initiate the idea every time