Boyfriend Isuse?

[Anonymous]

After 2 weeks of being distant with me, with the expression “I want to do something with the pain I have and invest it in me”, my boyfriend started going to the gym. It’s so weird, as before he never went to gym, actually he hated even the idea. Now, he’s obsessed, he is looking in the mirror nonstop and so on… also, he wants more and more sex. I know that I should talk to him, but he seems so disturbed every time I ask…

[PrettyPriya]

What exactly is the question and what is the problem? I don't really see one other than him not communicating with you. Sounds like he is trying to better his health, which I would view as a good thing. Self improvement is positive.

Perhaps what he was saying when he said "I want to do something with the pain I have and invest it in me” was that he had mental (or physical) pain and he was going to make a change in life to better himself by going to the gym.

As for the looking in the mirror, guys that work out do that. Hey, girls do that too. Constantly make sure we are not getting out of shape and self critiquing our bodies. I look at it the same as that but perhaps more proud that he made a good change.

The increase in sex drive is probably due to the better health and more positive body image he has of himself. I would think that is why he wants intimacy more often. Just a guess but you really have to communicate with him, however you break through to get him to open up.

[Asker]

Thank you so much for your answer! Means a lot! 🤍 I was just wondering, as he hated going to gym and now i think that he wants to go to the gym to get more attractive and eventually attract a new partner

[PrettyPriya]

Nah, I don't get that feeling. I think he finally realized that he needed to make a health change and get in shape. He is doing the right thing and from my opinion, I think he is probably a little vain right now looking at all the good progress.

That happens if he spent years out of shape and unhappy with his looks and then put in the work and effort and made a change. He is proud of himself. I would not jump to him doing this to find someone new. There would be other signs.

I know you said he was distant for a bit, but that doesn't exactly mean he is looking for someone else. He may have just been focused and engaged getting in shape and you misread it.

[Asker]

Well, it was the fact that he said that since some weeks he kept in him the fact that “I’m talking ironically to him” and wanted to break up with me, but I told him that I understood his problem and I’ll try my best to understand him every single time, so this distance was caused by this… I don’t know what to say anymore, but I just help that this is gonna turn good

[Asker]

And I mean… we have a long distance relationship and during the day we do not talk that much, and in the we used to talk more, But now with him being at the gym, we are not talking anymore, i don’t know, i simply do not feel allright… I think that if i will Tell him this, he will Say that if i do not like it, he will not change it

[Guy13]

Let him work out without advisement and meddling, however, keep a casual and inexpressive eye 👁 on him.

[Asker]

Do you think that he started working out for other girls? Or to help him detaching of me?

[Asker]

I even asked him what with the sudden change, and he told me “ I feel deeply sedentary”

[boobliker]

DUMP and run not worth it!

[Asker]

Why?

[boobliker]

if your here asking that's why

[In_Trance]

Dump him

[Asker]

Why?

[In_Trance]

He can't even communicate with you. What kind of a relationship are you going to form with that?

[Asker]

You are right. Thank you!