Do girls settle for looks more often than men?

[HonestHannah]

I notice a lot of beautiful women with average looking men. I also know a lot of men who prioritize how a woman looks. Do women settle look wise more than men?

[Anonymous]

Yes women can be flexible on this. You can argue that is a benefit to men. On the surface I guess it is

However there men are held to a much higher standard in multiple different other areas when it comes to dating. Several that you probably take for granted. We are expected to have our shit together to our careers, not be boring, know “the game”, tolerate and handle occasionally unfair behavior from women, take risks and stick our necks out, tolerate being shit tested, etc.

If an average looking guy can pull it off then good for him. In fact I was that guy with last girlfriend a few years ago. I have been told I was an attractive 35 year old but she was an extremely attractive 21 year old fitness model. When it came to just looks in itself she was beyond me. I wasn’t a sugar daddy either. She liked me at the time because i fortunately approached her in a way she wanted from men.

However average looking guys have very little wiggle room in all the other standards women have for men. If he’s broke or has other issues she won’t stick with him for long. She has a lot more options then he does.

[Anonymous]

Both genders care equally about looks.

men are just more open about saying that they care about a woman’s looks. funnily this has also let men to delude themselves into thinking their own looks dont matter and that you just need game and money and status, probably as a way to keep themselves emotionally safe because they know how much looks matter.

women dont talk about looks as much in a man but they absolutely care as much as men do. And funnily for women, most think that their looks is all that they need to be with a man.

see the polar opposites?

[AmyHew1tt]

I noticed that too, and apparently you're right. Though honestly, I don't think I could settle in looks. I'm not judgmental or anything and I don't think all guys need to look like models, but if I want to be romantically interested in a guy, he needs to be physically attractive to me. I don't get the money thing either, like how a woman could settle for a meh-looking dude just for money. I don't know if there's something wrong with me, because money is the last thing I consider when interested in someone.

That said, good looks only stay good-looking and attractive if the guy has a good personality as well. And a good personality can make you look more attractive anyway. I don't know if guys are the same way, or if they'd contentedly date a girl who was hot and a vapid jerk.

People are interesting.

[monorprise]

@HonestHannah
Everything is a tradeoff, what you get in looks you will lose in loyalty, and possibly usefulness.

That we men don't generally care if a woman has an income instead invest that savings in her looks department as biologically we are programed to value her ability to give us children first and foremost.

Likewise given a man's limited role in the child-making process, loyalty is also similarly less valuable to a man.

A smart woman would likewise do exactly the opposite given the huge investment she must make biologically in the relationship. Yes Looks matter, but they won't matter in a year if the man is useless or disloyal.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

I’d rather have a man with best looks, all men can be idiots, I might as well like the idiot I am with.

Personality wise a nice guy doesn’t exist, that’s just a strategy to get into your pants, we’ve seen women heartbroken by nice guys as well as not so nice guys.

My ex was the nicest guy in the world, but I was the one who got heartbroken in the end.

So, here’s what I learned, I will refuse to settle for anything less than great, if I risk being heartbroken in any case, I would rather risk it with someone I find the hottest.

[Pinay_ako]

I’d lie if I am not physically attracted first before I fall. Or get serious.

[Summeroflove]

Maybe because there’s more to love than just looks

[Poppymarie]

I have settled in the past, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t care about looks. Physical attraction is important to me, but sometimes I can be attracted to someone because of their personality. Basically, I wouldn’t date a guy who I thought was just plain ugly, but I’d settle for one who was below average if we got along well. Thankfully, I didn’t have to settle with my fiancé; I got the best of both worlds!

[Anonymous]

Being wealthy is a curse because if a guy or man is dumb enough to “attract” women that way, she’s a gold digger, or her main purpose is to marry, wait it out, has something scheming in that fucked up mind of hers and divorce him to take more then half. I don’t trust women nowadays, I blame modern day feminism for that — not sure why angry femcels have this I want to be rich like a man, pull the im a female innocence card but take the accountability of a child. I’m not an angry simp/incel. To be honest I don’t care about sex and pussy, there’s nothing pleasing to me sticking my penis for something that’s been used by other dudes. I’m old school/traditional chivalrous guy but nowadays young women find a good gentleman to be a major turn off because he’s “desperate”. When the smoke clears and 30-40 years pass, women will realize their mistakes, same with guys, I don’t want to make it seem like guys are perfect, males fuck up big time to.

[VikingWarLord]

For dudes MONEY IS KING

He can be old, fat, bald, etc.. but if he's rich, he can snag hot models.

[HonestHannah]

So women probably settle because they want money more than attraction?

[VikingWarLord]

It can be equal depending. Many chics will get with dudes who are unemployed if they're hot enough and/or have a big D.

I remember about 10 years ago a chic said she only liked me because I had a big D and I was super hot, which is rare to find. She didn't care what I did or how much I made, etc.. she just wanted my body and big fat D

[HonestHannah]

True!

[red324]

I think a good personality makes up for looks, but at the same time she needs a personality too for his personality to shine. A comedian won't do good if his only audience is a peg board.

[TonyV]

I don't think so, I think it just seems that way cause every woman thinks they are a 10 when in reality they are mostly 4s to 7s, you know in or near the average range.

Body positivity is running wild, if you believe the internet apperently lizzo is well above average instead of a 3 or 4.

[strateguy632]

probly the "ten" men are rare so if he has other qualities they will "settle" for average looks. we guys prefer the prettiest and often overlooked other qualities prioritising how they dress. reference "you belong with me" song.

[Shamalien]

What does a man want in a woman? Primarily, beauty.

what does a woman want in a man? The #1 thing is not looks I can tell you that

[HonestHannah]

I wonder why though?

[HighValue]

No. If that was the case, there wouldn't be so many short men complaining about being rejected for their height. Women care about looks more than men do. The majority of men are okay with a partner that is a 5 or better in looks as long as her personality and morals are compatible. The majority of women are only okay with a partner that is a 7 or higher in looks.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely.. Men are way more shallow (They call it being visual; I call it being shallow) about looks compared to women.. Think about it: how many couples where the girl was older or less attractive than the guy have you seen? Even if a girl educated, rich, stylish, kind, funny, have a PhD from Harvard, a pilot license, guys don't give a damn, unless she's hot...

[bushwookie]

Shit it’s hard to even find a woman that’s worth a damn around here. Women are much more judgement with looks than guys where I’m at. If she thinks she’s hot she only goes after the guys that all look the same and treat her poorly and then blames all guys for how they are.

[Vegasrunner]

I would say yes and the reason is because men have to bring much more to a relationship than women. A rich ugly man will always get more women than a broke attractive man. On the other hand men don't care about a women's success so they have less ways to compensate for being unattractive.

[This_Is_My_Opinion8]

Is not that they settle.

In a real world, finding a person that is perfect, absolutely perfect, is not realistic. Mostly because that person does not exist.

So what is worth more? Looks? Personality? A mix of both?

Let's say they find someone more attractive than their partner, but their personalities don't match as well. Or vice versa.

Ether option, will look like a "settlement". When in fact it isn't.

The perfect person doesn't exist.

[OfMiceandMen]

Quite often the average looking guy with the beautiful women is probably brilliant/talented and worth a lot of dough. You see it all the time in the music industry and actors who are not that great looking, yet have a model on their arm.

[Lionman95]

No I'd rather say that there are more attractive women than guys. Therefore women have fewer options in that regard. Guys and women look for different things in a partner and it's not always good to date a good looking partner.

[monorprise]

@Lionman95
That may be the case as a result of the same reason why women will settle more on looks in favor of uses-fullness and loyalty.

It basically comes down to ideal mating strategy. The huge investment of pregnancy and child rearing women must make in a relationships compared to a man who might otherwise get that from a 1 night stand.

Means the smart woman has to prioritize uses fullness and most of all loyalty over good genes (looks). Where as a man can do well by betting everything on the youth and good Genes (looks), and indeed gets nothing from a woman who is too old.

As a result women will invest far more in looks, while men invest more in resources and social gaming (to convince women of their loyalty)

[Uenvy694u]

I would say yes. Reason being 2 a MSN looks are not everything. A woman with a good personaity and being caring goes a long ways. Remember looks aren't everything beauty is only skin deep. Other attributes about a woman can make her look attractive.

[Anonymous]

Yes, because for women the highest priority traits in a mate revolve more around function and resources, whereas for men highest priority traits in a mate revolve more around procreation. It's not necessarily a conscious thing, it's coded in our DNA.

[brandon1122]

Cause they've met many creeps. They want to be with someone who is committed and won't give up on them.

[Haha456]

i wouldn't even say average looking guys, i would say unattractive guys. but i always see super attractive guys with at least average looking girls.

[BCA6010]

I'm inclined to say yes, but I can't think of any specific women I've known who ended up with unattractive men who didn't bring significant monetary security with them.

[WanderingLoveWizard]

I don't think they have a choice to be honest. The selection of truly good looking men is much lower than good looking women. Which is why women look for so many other traits in men than just looks

[WanderingLoveWizard]

Which is also why the men women do find attractive aren't really all that good looking in reality

[Anemone978]

I think so.. my husband I wasn't even attracted to, it was just he loved me, we had lots in common and he was loyal.
When I left then I only cared about looks..

[monorprise]

@anemone978 Sounds like you were a cheater.

Everything is a trade off, what you get in looks you lose in usefulness or loyalty.

Caring about looks (genes/age) is only a good mating strategy for a man because a 1 night stand is enough for man. Therefore usefulness or loyalty is of relatively little value to a man, and the cost of poor looks can be higher.

A women on the other hand have the exact opposite ideal mating strategy precisely because the enormous amount of biological investment they are expected to put into such a relationship via pregnancy and child rearing.
As such looks don't mean much to a woman if the man is useless or dumps her with the investment.

So women who adopt the man's strategy are ultimately just accepting defeat either in forgoing a biological future (whats the point of the relationship?), or forgoing any aid in raising children. thus doing everything themselfs.

[Anemone978]

@monorprise I wasn't a cheater, I only been with him and sort of one other guy.. so not a cheater because it was when we were separated..

Literally not looking for advice.. I talked to plenty of dudes, and yes the hottest guys are usually not good for the long run but they are fine to mate with because you will have the best looking kids lol

[monorprise]

@anemone978 Kids which you then raise alone leading to all sort of other issues for said kids.

[Anemone978]

@monorprise Oh well I ain't actually gonna mate with anyone.. lol
Men are all a waste of time.. If they can't give me bags of money why bother to put up with the headache of them? I rather make my own money and just not deal with them.

[monorprise]

@anemone978 If its money your looking for then, then you also need loyalty, as such how can you afford attractive?

[Anemone978]

@monorprise I had loyalty.. I just I got sick of his shit for 10 years..
What are you talking about I never cheated on my husband? Are you dumb..
As such I can make my own money... lol

[monorprise]

@anemone978
You do know what the word loyalty means right? It means you stick together thou sickness and health. You learn to deal with unpleasantness aspects of the relationship and remain faithful.

I'm sure you can make your own money although I'm starting to wonder how seeing as you just got done telling me however a man is only worth something to you if he pays you for your "valuable" company via giving you bags of money.

[Anemone978]

@monorprise Yes.. but when a man drives you to try to kill yourself there is no need to be loyal anymore.. I tried my best for as long as I could handle..

Yeah that is all men are worth.. men are annoying as fuck, they want us to take care of them like we are their mother and they are just plain useless besides to give us money and fuck us... I honestly could do without and have been for quite some time now.

[monorprise]

@anemone978 I see, you know there is a word that describes your abusive attitude about men which starts with a W.

I don't know what your marriage or husband was like, but typically women who come to feel that way about their husbands do so because they had chosen to stop respecting him. If the man notices at all (and much of the time he doesn't because no one tells him) he will notice her abusing him and treating him like he were a mere child.

That you openly regarded him as such, and think he demands it of you. Is really just illustrates your one-sided view of the relationship, the same inflexible view of life that you likely lost respect for him over not agreeing with.

[Anemone978]

@monorprise What does my feelings of men have to do with you tho? It's not like I am mean to men I just don't want to fuck them or waste time on them lol

The thing is men try to make you "bend the knee" to them.. and I will never do that for a man ever again.

[monorprise]

@anemone978
I didn't suggest you feelings have anything to do with me, we are talking because I really want to better understand your point of view.

Why you feel the way you do, and what brought you to this position. I question you to better judge the origins and nature of your disposition.

In learning about your point of view I better understand the world as a whole.

[Anemone978]

@monorprise But why? It is just my point of view..
I have grown to feel this way because men have always disrespected me, bullied me, treated me like shit, called me names <-- these things just because I wouldn't dress like all the other sluts to give them a boner..

Then when it comes to dating guys they always try to tell me how to live my life and what to do.. its annoying.. If I needed a father I would go live with my dad lol

[monorprise]

@anemone978
So now your telling me that men treated you, like how you feel your husband expected you to treat him.

Is it not common for men to desire to see women dress attractive? Why would you let this bother you so much? Why would you not simply handle it better by simply saying no?
If they bully you, or treated you badly why would you not simply set your terms?

There is more here going on than I think even you yourself know.

As for the value of your point of view, beleive it or not your an individual, who has clearly lived a very different life than me with very different values. I try to get to understand the point of view of all such people when I have the chance to get a broader understanding of the world beyond my eyes.

[Anemone978]

@monorprise Yes, they love to tell you what to do like a dad.. then they want you to feed them, pick up after them like they are children and all this bullshit.. (this is men in a nutshell)

And these were just random guys I would walk by at school and in public.. they would say mean or rude things just because I dress in baggy clothes (im a tomboy).. they would do it because I wasn't tempting them by dressing attractive like all the other girls. Had I dressed like how guys liked they would have been nice and tried to get into my pants.. because when I dress attractive now men are always nice to me... this is one of the main reasons I do not like men, it's almost disgusting and makes me hate them.

Okay, but I don't think I'm gonna give you a broader understanding lol

[monorprise]

@anemone978
Sounds like a lot of your issues with men relate to the fact that your a tomboy. If that were really the case why didn't you find a husband who could simply be your friend with shared Interest?

The word broader refers to being wider in range in a relative sense. The fact that your experience and point of view is soo different from mine makes it broader, even if it seems diamond to you.. If I were to tell you my story and how I feel you would likewise be enriched with a broader perspective on life.

This is the point of theses conversations.

[Anemone978]

@monorprise I know what broader means but considering you want to reply to me like I am dumb, I guess that is the end of this little conversation.

[monorprise]

@anemone978
I would like to apologize I was not intending to imply you lacked intelligence in defining a term, I find quite a lot of people have different understandings of words which makes correct commutation very difficult.

We need not continue the conversation regardless if you have nothing more to share about yourself. I just prefer you didn't feel I felt you were dumb.

[Rockstarrrrr]

Yeah lol... There's way more attractive girls than guys.. They kinda have to xD... But most women go with the flow and embrace being just a trophy wife / girlfriend.. so, they don't have to be really attracted to the guy...

[aoihewgf]

I would think so. Looks are important for both men and women but since women's preference list is longer than men's, it's only logical that they have less percentage to put in that category.

[genericname85]

no, women prioritize looks just like men. it's just not about beauty so much but more about masculine traits. facial hair, wideness of the shoulders and hight.

[Anonymous]

not to be all stereotypical, but maybe because THEY TREAT THEM RIGHT. in the end, we just want a guy who respects us and treats us amazingly, regardless of looks.

[Berethor]

Maybe, men are strong, women are pretty trope, but many women have fake looks nowadays.

[Christoff92]

Yeh. Few of my girlfriends would always want to surprise me with their looks after doing their makeup. They didn't wear any makeup then would look aways.

[UniquelyBasic]

Probably but even then I don't think women settle for looks that much.

[MementoMori777]

All I know is this world is fucked smh

[HonestHannah]

for real

[fonduegirl]

Yes. People settle a lot.

Because men are "visual creatures" or some shit.

[scooogy]

We're some shit I guess 🤷

[Anonymous]

Yeah cuz we're not dumb like men to value on physical looks, we're smart enough to go for rich and committed.

[monorprise]

Its has a lot more to do with biology dictating a different ideal strategic mating options for men.

Mating/Evolution is all about producing children. The huge investment of pregnancy and child rearing women must make in a relationships compared to a man who might otherwise get that from a 1 night stand.

Means the smart woman has to prioritize usefulness and most of all loyalty over good genes (looks). Where as a man can do well by betting everything on the youth and good Genes (looks), and indeed gets nothing from a woman who is too old (thus ugly as far as he can tell).

As a result women will invest far more in looks, while men invest more in resources and social gaming (to convince women of their loyalty).

My wife find this idea shocking but its true, the player in nature is in fact a winning strategy for a man. It only doesn't work in communal species where the offspring of players get neglected or killed.

[Shy_Steve]

Us Guys just judge Girls on looks and Personality, Girls judge Guys on Everything that's the problem.

[monorprise]

@Shy_Steve
Look at it from a strategic point of view of best mating strategy.

Mating/Evolution is all about producing children. The huge investment of pregnancy and child rearing women must make in a relationships compared to a man who might otherwise get that from a 1 night stand. Means the smart woman has to prioritize usefulness and most of all loyalty over good genes (looks). Where as a man can do well by betting everything on the youth and good Genes (looks), and indeed gets nothing from a woman who is too old (thus ugly as far as he can tell).

Now what has changed in the modern woman to make them behave more and more like men?
Well that would be the welfare state, and wide spread female employment, and its promise to let women support children without a man.

Hence we see the demographic change that follows, granted such women and the state which enables them are creating huge problems that come from children raised without fathers.
They are also choosing lives that will be far more diffiuclt for them as well.

But their alternative is to wast far too much time navigating the extremely hostile and unpredictable dating market in a state of ignorance to find a 'good' man.

[Grond21]

Gorls don't settle for looks more, they just prioritize them less.

[smartman12]

Because women have more options than men, they rarely settle for average or below average looking men unless they meet a unique one through friends.

[Anonymous]

They do when they realize that to the top 5% of men (the ones they are interested in), only want them for a pump and dump.

[Anonymous]

No. It's about even. Maybe at one time. But women today are much more aggressive and superficial.

[shades777]

women settle for guys over 6ft with 6 figures with 6 toes

[Tellme]

I have no idea, but that’s an interesting question!

[msc545]

I think they do - appearance is very important to women.

[Anonymous]

Girls settle for money, wealth etc. Irrespective of looks. Almost 98% girls go for that

[Anonymous]

Yes, women go for money and stability, and men go for looks. It's already heavily established.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely. But then women don't have much options of good looking men... so they would either have to settle for an average or uglier man or choose a beautiful looking woman.

[DarkLegacy]

Other way round

[Enochian]

Yes. If they didn’t I wouldn’t be single

[BrookeS]

100 percent yes

[peedy]

No they settle for money

[Josef_89]

Hellow

hat kind of art do you do

[Anonymous]

because men are more often shallow

[monorprise]

If you want to understand the nature of what draw people to choose mates. You need to look at it from the point of view of best mating strategy.

Remembering that mating/Evolution is all about producing children.

In this regard the huge investment of pregnancy and child rearing a women must make in a relationships, forced the woman to prioritized usefulness and loyalty over good genes (as judged by looks).

A man by contrast in an environment where he can expect a woman to raise the child successfully on his own would do better with a player/1 night stand strategy. Even thou this strongly disadvantage's the woman who must have and raise the child alone.

As such usefulness and loyalty matter little to a man compared to youth/genes (as judged by looks).

The male strategy only collapses into monogamous marriage, in situations where there is no support or security for out of wedlock children. Thus forcing him to stay and help protect them rather than make more with other women.

Hence you can see why we created the player problem with the welfare state.

[Opinion Owner]

@monorprise so men are shallow

[In_Trance]

they rarely do

[NATesque]

Yes they do

[Miraçaydn]

girls look for money