What can short men do to significantly increase their dating pool on dating apps?

[Anonymous]

I'm 5'6 and I went to Arizona for a while. When using dating apps I very quickly go through the women in the whole city on that app while my friends that use the same apps are still finding options to no end. Immediately I assumed that it was my height being filtered out. And it's not a matter of getting off the dating apps. Dating apps is how people meet nowadays, if short men can't move in the modern times then something is very wrong and something has to change about it.

[TommyWiseau69]

Don't try. Instead of looking for a woman have a woman look for you, seriously. As short men we don't have the privilege of being picky about preferences we have with women and it will never work in our favor. You have to lower your standards tremendously. Don't expect a super attractive cute woman to want you. There's a chance that plain average women will go for you, you can't be picky though. I find that average women have better personalities. Leave all the attractive and cute women to the tall good looking guys, but just note that their personality might not even be the best. Never judge a book by its cover. As a short man I'll take a below average looking woman with an amazing personality over an attractive woman with a shitty one any day.

[Asker]

Bro, I'm sorry but you have to have a standard. You can't just set yourself up with the very first person to say they don't mind your height. I'll give you lowering your standards a little bit, but if you have to lower your standards tremendously, what's even the point. I may be short, but I'm not a beggar by any means, and I live by my standards, which by the way have very little to do with a woman's physical appearance. If you don't have a standard, then women will walk all over you, but they don't mind your height so it's all good! Right? Wrong. Please don't think you aren't entitled to a standard or a preference just because of your height. I see so many short men end up in relationships they would have never been if they were a few inches taller, but they tolerate to not be alone. Do not be that guy.

[TommyWiseau69]

As a short guy you can't. For example as a short guy let's say you want a really attractive woman. Do you know how many guys that aren't short especially tall guys will be hitting on her? There's no shot. The attractive women will pass up short men like trash. I would say at bare minimum short men can probably get 5 - 6/10 women like just average. If you really wanna set standards and go for attractive women you better have all your shit together, amazing personality and be probably slightly above average looking yourself being extremely good looking will get you bonus points. Attractive women can go for non-short guys that are just average all around, but don't expect attractive women to just give you a glance if you are lacking in many areas or all. Shoot your shots, but you won't land a bullseye on a babe unless you practice improving yourself, a lot.

[Asker]

But see that's where you're going wrong because first of all you define a woman's attractiveness based on how she looks. Hypothetically if a 7/10 gave you attention, you would accept anything from her and tolerate everything from her just because she's an 7/10. Then she would lose respect for you because you don't have a standard, don't have a plan, and you're just with her because of how she looks. Versus the 4/10 you get with that realizes you're only with her because you had no other options and then loses attraction too.

[Ironic_Method]

Be funny. I'm 5'10" which isn't "short", but I've been called short many times for some reason, but in my experience the good ones will fall for a sense of humor. That, and nice hands.

[Nikki1989]

Being on dating apps is a far bigger problem than anything related to height. That is just a weak cop-out.

[Smashingdoozy]

1. Don't make your height your entire personality.
2. Actually have a personality.

[inhua]

people's looks are their personality

[Smashingdoozy]

@inhua that's not a personality. Nobody is going to stay with a hottie if they have no other decent qualities

[msc545]

Women do this all the time if the man has money.

[Asker]

@msc545 No they don't. They're attracted to a man's resources but they're not attracted to that man.

[Smashingdoozy]

@msc545 not really... Nobody is ONLY with another for money. Unless it's specifically agreed upon.

[inhua]

nobody cares about anyone's personality unless they find attractive them to begin with. that's just common sense. none of this PC bullshit about how personality is so important when some of the most successful people ever had bad personalities

plus personality can be faked. looks, height, money etc. are much more difficult to fake

[Asker]

Not true though. If they're physically attracted to you, there's little you can do to make them displease them. If they're not physically attracted to you, there's nothing you can do to please them.

[Smashingdoozy]

@inhua I don't disagree. Looks attract someone to you but personality is what makes them stick around. Personalities can only be faked for a small amount of time. Sooner or later your true self is exposed.

[inhua]

only certain situations expose a fake personality. people have been known to live entirely separate lives from which their friends, family and spouse know nothing about

[Asker]

Then how would personality help to attract people if personality is just what makes them stick around?

[Smashingdoozy]

@inhua that's not a different personality... It's not pretending to be someone you're not it's just lying.

[Smashingdoozy]

@asker I'm imagining your dating profile to have your height basically first thing in your bio which is unattractive whether you are tall or short. I'm sure you have far more interesting qualities which attract people that you can write about. Your pictures are going to draw people in to read your profile, I personally would immediately dislike you if I see your height in your bio.

[inhua]

you underestimate how easy it is to fake a personality and maintain it. there's a reason why people get really upset over being betrayal because it blindsides them completely

everybody likes to believe they are a good judge of character until their trusted spouse runs off with their trusted best friend whom they've known since pre-school

[Smashingdoozy]

@inhua yep what you're explaining is a lie and that facade falling down. Like I said you cannot keep up a fake personality.

[inhua]

the point still remains that personalities are malleable whereas looks and money are more static.

humans will always favor the static first over the malleable. take buying a car for example. people go for the car they like the best based on aesthetics first before worrying about the price because the price can be changed and negotiable. the appearance and functionality of the car is already set however the cost needs to be agreed upon by both the buyer and the seller

[Smashingdoozy]

@inhua you're seriously comparing cars to humans 💀💀

[msc545]

Nobody? Bullshit.

[Smashingdoozy]

@msc545 are you talking to me? If so you missed the actual key word. Which I put in caps for easier understanding.

[inhua]

it's a metaphor/analogy

[inhua]

perception can't be changed when it's biological hardwired in women to want to seek out tall men. best solution would be the try and increase men's heights which is easier said than done but comes with a lot of drawbacks

a short guy could always undertake leg lengthening and spine lengthening surgery to increase his height but comes at a cost of his mobility and lifespan. is it really worth increase one's height for a woman who wouldn't have accepted the man had he been shorter? that's up to the short guy to decide

[msc545]

Legs can be lengthened a little at great cost and pain. Spines cannot be lengthened.

[DrKrieger]

So you're lacking in the physiological realm. Now make money or relationships your strong suit. Money is hard, so I'd recommend going the status route - build your network and be someone people want to be around that'll open doors and draw girls to you

[thatshydork]

I don’t mind short guys (in fact, I tend to prefer guys who are closer to my height or shorter), it’s just that if they’re a certain height where they’re like eye level to my boobs, that’s awkward.

[BlackJeep]

You will have much better luck in the produce section of any grocery store than on a dating app and you will find the women much better. You will have very little competition. You will need to speak to them and if this is a problem you are SOL

[Boomchakalaca]

Wow u very quickly go through women 👏🏼 thats ur case

[Asker]

I didn't mean it like that, I meant I went through the women swiping.

[Anonymous]

The worst thing about short guys is they blame all their lack of success on their height, while never stopping to consider their personality is the real problem.

[Curmudgeon]

OK, but would *you* date such a man, or even help coach or advice such a male friend with respect to dating? No, you wouldn't.

For the record, I am 6 foot 5 inches tall or almost 2 meters for the metric people, and although I was an outcast and a dork, I was a TALL outcast dork, so I managed to escape that to that extent at least,

[Chthou95]

Get off dating apps. Those are for losers. And work on your finances. Work on your building yourself

[msc545]

Go to southeast Asia where the women are shorter and much nicer.

[Anonymous]

Lie. That's you best bet man. Or don't mention it at all.

[Anonymous]

I know short players. Height means nothing in the real world.

[msc545]

Accept it does your limited experience is notwithstanding

[Anonymous]

It can't be changed because those preferences are coded in our human DNA.

[DextroShade]

You have to compensate by being fit and wealthy.

[Anonymous]

It can't.