And if so, how and when should I ask her?
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Should I ask her How she feels about our relationship?
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A few details would be very helpful. How long have you been dating? How old is she? How old are you? Have either of you previously been married or have children? How serious is your relationship? Do you live together? Spend weekends together? Is the relationship sexual? Did you have a conversation about dating exclusively?
Absolutely. This is a crucial question especially if you're invested in the relationship. I suggest you take her to a nice dinner and ask her openly.