Is a 19 year old dating a 16 year old fine?

[Anonymous]

I asked a girl to starbucks and she said let me know what time. i told her i was 19 and she said “ah shit, im 16”. Then i said thats fine. Then she said okay.

Updates

+1 y

@_Maya_ How is that not a good sign

Updates

+1 y

where i live age of consent is 16, but I just want to date her not fuck her

[Tiamatisme]

I'm in a similar situation I've kinda realized that girls want older guys probably why a lot of people our same age are dating guys a couple years older than them I've talked to a few people about it they seem to think it's fine.

[Asker]

many girls at age 18 want a guy thats like 22 or 21, not all though.

[In_Trance]

Yeah

[AviatorTom]

Going to Starbucks together is fine. Be careful doing anything more serious though.

[Avicenna]

No, and I would avoid it even if it is legal where you live.

[Anonymous]

Yes it is, at the same time it isn’t. I say yes because legally you’re considered an adult, she isn’t as you already know. But now in a few years when she’s 18 and you’re 21 it’s fine. If you continue to talk to her, to see her, take her out, you need to abstain from sex, all forms of sex. I’m not sure it’s a chance worth taking because if something goes wrong even if you feel you didn’t do something it only takes her opening her mouth making a false claim that could land you in hot water. Even if you are found not guilty you’re pretty much labeled. I used to work in the prison for 8 years, a few young men your age came to prison for similar situations. One kid told me he was dating a 16 year old, he had just turned 18. Parents knew they were dating. He cheated on her, she didn’t like it so she told her parents he raped her. Of course not all these stories are true, but he’s turned out to be true but it was too late by then. He served X amount of years, nothing happened to her for making up a lie.

[_Maya_]

Alright so I don't blow up @snowedin's opinion I'll put my own. So there is a big gray area when you flirt with the 18 year old line. In my opinion it isn't worth it no matter the gender with exceptions. One would be you turned 18 and your girl wasn't going to in almost another year. You're already dating and was before you turned 18. So the why is it bad she said that? Well she either knows it is not good because of your laws or because she knows that gap at that age range is way bigger than the number suggests. 16 and 19 is much different than 26 and 29. Just looking at those numbers most would agree. I can go on and on why but I think people understand the difference at younger ages versus older ages.

[SnowedIn]

This. Times 10.

[_Maya_]

@SnowedIn thanks buddy. I just think about how he is two years away being served by me or partying with me and how that is closer in gap than the younger girl. In my head I go "nope" to that idea of the 16 year old who us 5 years away from doing those adult things. Hope that makes some sense to the asker or gives perspective.

[SnowedIn]

Exactly exactly.

[Asker]

age of consent where i live is 16 anyway

[thatshydork]

The age of consent maybe 16, but you’re at a very different point in your life when you’re 16 vs when you’re 19. When you’re 19 you’re either in college or getting ready to go to college, you’ve likely already gotten your drivers license, are generally more mature, generally have a more developed brain, are generally less naive, can vote in the US, and possibly even moved out. When you’re 16, you’re still in high school, still living with your parents, might’ve just gotten your license, still very much naive, your brain is less developed, and can’t even vote yet. Also, your brains are usually at different stages too.

[Losalt]

If *she* is okay with it, sure.
But thread *carefully*.
You're older then her and that's going to naturally put you in a position of authority to some degree, but at the same time she's vulnerable and needs to work these things out herself.
Make sure that you do *not* push her in any direction.
It might be a good idea to just keep it to shared activities etc for now.

[ShellyB]

I would not recommend it, for two reasons, first and most important it's really a pretty big gap as far as where you usually are in life. When you are 29 and she is 26 it is almost no gap but at 19 and 16 it is pretty big. The second reason is how people will perceive it. I think it would just be better not to. However I am not saying it can never work, I am sure sometimes it does. The gap is pretty big but not enormous so it's possible but just more potential problems. JMO!

[ShesRad80]

nope, its a problem waiting to happen. though still teens- you are both at very different places in life. if you are that into her, go ask her parents.

[madhatters4]

uh is it legal? i think you have to find that out to know if it is "fine". then if you're asking it does suggest you have some personal questions about the matter. if that is the case choose the decision (the legal one) that works for you

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Yes it is. Love is always legal!

[madhatters4]

@HippieVeganJewslim yeah i don't think that nice thought will necessarily hold up in a court depending on where you

[HippieVeganJewslim]

If you assume that sex equals love, you need help.

[madhatters4]

@HippieVeganJewslim bro. do i make the laws? laws trump feelings

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Laws cannot dicktate dating, mate, just can dicktate sex!

[slatyb]

It's a long way from 16 to 19. Presumably she's still in high school. If she's dating you then suddenly high school activities will no longer be interesting. That's a bit sad, isn't it? Would you be happy to take her to her prom? If you would not, would you want her to miss it,?

[RingOfFire]

It gets really weird at your age. You are only 3 years older than her but on the other hand in some states I think it could theoretically get you in trouble. When I was your age I dated 16 year olds but back then everybody did. I think these days its more of a potential issue. I would look for someone 18 and up.

[Anemone978]

Yeah you are only 3 years apart.. its not a big deal..

[Apple1996]

Nah in 5 years she will be complaining how you groomed her so don't go through with it

[SnowedIn]

Big giant flashing red light man.

Stay away from that.

[_Maya_]

Agree and when she goes ah shit that ain't a good sign either.

[SnowedIn]

@_Maya_ Yeah.

[SnowedIn]

@Zachgoat308 ... I am thrilled that you took the initiative with a girl. That's awesome. And, yes, you'll find me all over GaG and in real life saying there's no issue with age gaps. Which is true. EXCEPT over 18/under 18. And you may tell me "but we're not going to do anything" and the other gent is right that in Europe and elsewhere this might be nothing.

But you're in the US and you have already told us in your 763 other questions that you're one horny goat. That's a bad mix for you and someone under 18.

Just stay away.

[SnowedIn]

Regarding your update: are you not reading what we're writing?

[Levin]

Depends what part of the shithole world you're from. If you're from the US you're a paedo. It's fine in Europe.

[FunkyMonkee]

Yeah, as long as 16 is legal where they are. If not, the 19 year old will have to wait about 2 years.

[sheikalana]

You're still a minor at 16 so I guess is not fine yet. Wait two more years.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

Zach is 19.

[BigDog1989]

In my state, it would be. Age of consent here is 16, however, you'd have to wonder why the 19 year old, is going so low

[Anonymous]

i was with a lot older guys than that when i was 16

[HippieVeganJewslim]

As long as there’s no sexual activity, all fine! I dated an 11-year-old lass whilst being 16.

[elontesler3]

not in USA. you ll meet chris hansen of dateline nbc

[Anonymous]

Dude, I think it is perfectly fine. The age gap is not too large. Only 3 years difference and people want to complain about that shit? What has this world come to?

[Sonorous]

Depends on the maturity level of both.

[exitseven]

Yes, but no sex.

[Lyndsielee666]

Not it champ

[MementoMori777]

I don't think so

[shortster]

Not really

[Jmmmfi4]

Bad idea