How do I get a teen girlfriend before I hit 30?

[Anonymous]

I am inching very close to 30. I really want a teen girlfriend. Or at least in very early 20s.

[D_Bone_Steak]

My kid told me to go on Instagram. You could just hang out at High Schools and look cool smoking behind buildings. Bring vodka in a water bottle and some weed. If you want to go all out you could buy a big white van.

[OfMiceandMen]

You would likely have more in common with someone 25 to 30, I would think? 18 to 20 or so seems a little young.

[LazerBean]

@SouthernWhiteMan the only way a teen girlfriend would ever want someone of your kind is if you have a crap ton of money, which you don't. So better get to work.

[Jamie05rhs]

She's actually not being mean. She's telling you the truth. She's trying to help you.

[Asker]

@Jamie05rhs No, she has been a bitch for a long time towards me.

[Jamie05rhs]

Well, she's giving you good advice this time at least. I would take her advice.

[Asker]

@Jamie05rhs I am a long way off from becoming extremely wealthy, lol

[LazerBean]

The truth hurts, and I'm being nicer to you than you deserve.

[Jamie05rhs]

@Asker You can start somewhere.

[SnowedIn]

You may want to amend that to say over 18. And, yes, if you're about to tell me that it's X age where you live, fine. My point is that all the users in places where the age is 18 are going to think you want a kid as your girlfriend.

[Asker]

18 is the lowest I should go at this point.

[FunkyMonkee]

Start hanging out at high schools and colleges. Don't forget the long raincoat.

[Asker]

I am talking about 18 and 19 and maybe very early 20s.

[FunkyMonkee]

So am I. Some girls turn 18 before they graduate high school and they tend to be in college from 18 onwards.

[Drumlin2001]

Why you want a teen girlfriend? What's the benefit over say 25yr old or 28yr old? Do you not want to settle down any time?

[Sasha0426]

Yeah, that doesn’t sound creepy at all 🙄

[Asker]

Younger women are flawlessly beautiful and haven't been through the wringer emotionally and sexually (usually).

[Asker]

I like that you have never had a boyfriend, but physically, you are just really unattractive. Sorry. I am not trying to be mean but honest.

[Sasha0426]

You’re not the first one 🤷‍♀️ I call myself ugly all the time so it’s cool.

[Asker]

I am not the best looking right now, but I am shedding weight. I look great when I am thin. Sadly, I don't know if I will be able to find an averagely attractive woman without a romantic past.

[Sasha0426]

Nope, you never will. You’re attractive enough.

[Asker]

Why is everyone so adamant I will not find a young woman that had never had a boyfriend or first love? I know my dating pool is much smaller, but I don't why it is impossible if I really seek that.

[Sasha0426]

Actually, I don’t see you finding anyone at all. I’m getting creepy vibes from you.

[Sasha0426]

Also, I meant to say you’re NOT attractive either. No woman wants an ugly man such as yourself. Especially, a creepy one.

[EtherealWriter]

Disgusting.. 🤢

[ryancg]

You're doing a bit or something right?

[Anonymous]

You have to pay for it.

[In_Trance]

Cringe

[Asker]

But why? They are beautiful, fertile, and attractive.