How many people have you dated before you found the one / current husband/wife/ final partner?

Question

How many partners did have before meeting your current partner? How did you meet your current partner?

Lliam · Answer

I've had quite a few dates but seven actual girlfriends before I met my (future) wife.

I was 16 when I met my first girlfriend. I had four long term girlfriends all together in high school and the first half of my 20s.

When I was 26, I was handed a great job. It required me to cut my long hair and start wearing a suit. I no longer fit in with the kinds of people I used to hang out with, but I felt like an imposter being a suit. I didn't recognize myself.

The job was really hard at first, so I was stressed out. It was also sedentary AND I got taken out to lunch almost every day to good places.

Long story short, I wound up gaining about 50 lbs by the time I was 29. At that point, I didn't like myself and didn't want the kind of girl who would like me. So I went about five years without a girlfriend.

When I was 34, I went on Weight Watchers, lost the weight and got back into good shape. By then, I had gotten my job wired and had also become comfortable being an adult.

I started dating again - asking women out.

The third one was when I was 36. She was 30. She is the first woman I ever loved with my heart and soul. She loved me, too. We lived together for over a year. But it turned out that we weren't destined to be life partners. We separated for reasons that are complicated but had nothing to do with cheating or anything mean. We still loved each other.

I felt like I was going die without her. It is the greatest pain I have ever experienced. It took me over a year to pull myself together and move on with life.

When I was 39, I heard about a dating org called Great Expectations. This was pre-internet.

Once you enrolled, you went in for a photo shoot, then you chose the photo you wanted in your profile. Your profile consisted of one page with an 8"10" photo on one side and your profile on the other.

There were rows and rows of ring binders full of profiles organized alphabetically by first name initials. Blue binders for guys and pink binders for women.

If you wanted to meet someone, you submitted a card to the front desk. They would let that person know that they had an invitation. If they accepted, the office would give both people each other's phone numbers. You could submit up to five requests a week.

I went on several dates.

I met one lady at a restaurant. She was really pretty and our conversation was effortless. At some point, I felt something bumping my foot and realized that a waiter was vacuuming under our table. We realized that the place was empty and they were closing. We had been there for a couple hours. Time had just flown.

We walked out to our cars in the parking lot out back and continued to chat. When we were ready to leave, we realized that someone had locked the gate. So I hopped over the 6' high, cinder block wall and got someone to open it.

Before we left, she stepped forward, looked up at me adoringly, then put her hands on top of my shoulders, rose up on her tip toes, and gave me a tender, lingering kiss.

Two days later, she called. I was surprised. She said she had been offered two tickets to a Rolling Stones and Red Hot Chili Peppers concert and wondered if I was interested.

Of course I was interested.

She knew I was a rocker and I knew she wasn't. I don't know how she actually got those tickets. But I admired her initiative and courage in calling me.

We went to the concert and began dating exclusively after that.

We got married two years later.

MiddleAgedClimbee · Answer

My first real girlfriend occurred in high school, and we dated my senior year into my freshman year of college. It ended because we went to different universities and it just didn't make sense. I met a girl a couple years later the junior year of college. She was my first sexual relationship. it ended due to a bit much clinginess on her part, and honestly we were happy together, but I activities and interests are not common. Fast forward several years and lots of dates. I strolled into a restaurant, after being single for over a year, I had just turned 26. The lady that I have been with for over 20 years if you count dating was my server. She was chatty and bubbly, just like me, and a brunette, which I've always preferred for whatever reasons :-). I was at the restaurant for a couple of hours, the food wasn't great, but her company and kindness kept me there. We never exchanged numbers that night. I gathered up the nerve to return to the restaurant several times during the following week, but I never saw her. It took the prompting of a friend to go back on a weekend to see if she might be working. Sure enough, after two weeks from our original meeting date, she was there , we saw each other and she walked up and handed me her number, telling me "I should've given this to you when I first met you."

The rest is history.

strateguy632 · Answer

great question. i dated many. i met current by friend network and suggested

How many people have you dated before you found the one / current husband/wife/ final partner?

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