Why do people not answer all the qs on dating apps?

[Monalisa77]

Why leave out if you smoke or have kids... Seems dishonest as if they hsvr something to hide?

Updates

+1 y

And just saw my typo lol *have

Updates

+1 y

Now im being told people can put wherever they want on location red flag if theyre gonna lie?

[wiltingrosepetal]

Either A, they're aware their answer is a deal breaker and would rather the person figure it out in time (cough... short guys who hide their height... cough)
B, they don't have an answer. No job, too young for kids, no current school- no response. They may not know their MBTI or star sign either.
Or C, they don't think their answer changes anything, so they don't bother

[Anonymous]

Common sense. The less you answer the less women have to judge you on. It's OK if some women find it dishonest. I wouldn't want to date a woman that approached with that negative of an attitude anyways. She can can keep it moving.🙂👍

[Monalisa77]

So its not fair if i want to know if u smoke and or have kids, how is that negative?

[Opinion Owner]

No it's totally fair. It's just not easy. You're going to have to put in some EFFORT to find out that's all. If you don't want to do that then you don't DESERVE to know.

[Monalisa77]

I worry i come off too pusby or judgmental, so ud be fine if i asked u that?

[Monalisa77]

there's other things id put the effort in for, if u said yes ill just unmatch n be a waste of time

[Opinion Owner]

Well I gave you the biggest key. The single biggest turnoff of a woman on a dating site is NEGATIVITY. I don't hide ANYTHING I'll answer ANY question asked so long as I trust the motives for asking it.

My advice to you is above all have a positive attitude.

[Monalisa77]

But is not wanting to date someone who smokes and or has kids negative? U didn't answer that q

[Opinion Owner]

Because I can't answer that for you. I would call them baggage.

[Ironic_Method]

I don't always feel comfortable putting all my information on display, such as how much I make or where I work. Hasn't been an issue.

[Monalisa77]

Nah im not bothered about that but id like to knkow if u smoke or have kids before i get invested

[Ironic_Method]

Agreed. Fortunately those are very easy questions to ask and answer.

[Monalisa77]

Exactly

[Monalisa77]

I just feel tho like id be pushy ans judgmental asking its much easier if they just had them in their profile

[Ironic_Method]

It would certainly be easier and less time wasting.

[TheSpaceGnome]

I don't know, but if they aren't willing to answer everything and fill everything out, they should just leave the app/site.

[love_conquers_lust]

You answered your own question. Or laziness.

[Monalisa77]

Yeah I've got anxiety so always wonder if what i say is true lol

[love_conquers_lust]

I remember. I’m confirming your suspicion can be a valid one. You’re not being unreasonable:

Do you feel that your standards for the opposite sex are high or low? ↗

[Monalisa77]

I dont know what to say to get to know someone when they haven't put much up i feel like i could be seen as too pushy for info by asking

[love_conquers_lust]

The conversations will have to be rehashed in person anyway. So I wouldn’t worry about it. Just ask.

[roy_ricky09]

Don't you think dating apps is one of the biggest problem

[Monalisa77]

Im chatting to guys so its helping me with confidence

[roy_ricky09]

Stupidity is all

[TheSpaceGnome]

The problem isn't dating apps/sites, the problem is people who don't use them properly.
Logically, it would be the fastest way to find a pefect match if done correctly,

[roy_ricky09]

Seriously?

[TheSpaceGnome]

Yes, seriously. Apps/sites that allow long bios, multiple image uploads, have personality, lifestyle, morality, belief (or lack thereof), hobby and interest related questions, and have a detailed dealbreaker and profile fill that includes memtioning any bad habits or wanting kids or not, allow for much better matching than any other dating method. But most people don't fill all of that out, let alone fill it all out honestly.

People often use it to get one night stands/hookups, or to date but they put only a sentence or 2 in their bio and leave lots of things about them blank. Doing it that half assed way makes the app/site useless, as not only will the right people not be able to find you, but algorithms that match people together will fail as well. Do yes, the problem is how people use them.

[TheSpaceGnome]

mentioning* So yes*

[TheSpaceGnome]

Also apps like tinder which do not allow that sort of detailing, are not dating apps, they are hookup apps, and those are a problem.

[roy_ricky09]

What happened to the conventional ways of human interactions?
Get out of the house and meet the real people.

[Monalisa77]

U dont think icw not tried that a tmy age? I dont pick up the right signs anx or get told ur reading things into it too much :/

[TheSpaceGnome]

@roy_ricky09 The ones on dating sites are real people.

And that way of meeting people dissapeared when high end video games became cheaper to run at home, arcades started to dwindle in number, game rental stores started to die out, digital became the norm over physical copies, and online multiplayer became the norm over couch co-op. There simply isn't anywhere for me to go to meet a likeminded woman.

I only date atheist women who are artists and gamers who are into science, sci-fi and fantasy, anime, etc, and don't drink alcohol.

All of them spend their free time at home just like I do, I'm not going to find them at a bar, club, church, or other out of the home place.

If I went out, I might meet women, but they aren't going to be that kind of woman, so I'm not going to want them.

[roy_ricky09]

Wow. You need to grow up bud. 🤣

[TheSpaceGnome]

I am grown up, you're just boring.