How often do you come across attractive people who radiate joy and acceptance and are more than their looks?

[DeJjjj]

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

I find a number these days but I've learned the places to look for the best company. Also I've kind of learned to tell as I studied more about philosophies like Stoicism and Buddhism as to who puts such ways of thinking promoting inner peace and joy into practice in ways that go deeper.

[DeJjjj]

Do you believe that bribing more to the table than just your looks comes with age and maturing? Like how likely is it that you’ll find a 20-21 year old who radiates joy and acceptance? Considering at that age you’re still figuring things out.

[DeJjjj]

*bringing

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

I think it requires a more conscious effort for some of us. At least it did for me. Some people might do it naturally but I was prone to think negatively at times in ways I had to consciously challenge and correct, taking into mind teachings like this:



So whenever I started to find myself thinking negatively, I had to reframe it. For example, if I thought a day was "stressful, awful", that would make me feel stressed and awful. So I learned to recognize that and reframe it with words like "challenging". "Challenging" doesn't stress me out and make me feel awful; it fills me with motivation.

I suspect professional therapy can really accelerate the process for those who have difficulty thinking positively and productively all the time. I never managed to get it (although I wasn't allergic to the idea) since psychotherapeutic techniques aren't popular here in Japan. Yet I learned to become my own self-therapist learning about Stoicism, Buddhism, and later Cognitive Behavioral Therapy which is inspired by Stoicism.

I'm not sure if I radiate joy and acceptance all the time (still a student) but learning about it also helped me to spot people who genuinely do.

[DeJjjj]

That’s a wonderful way of perceiving things and efficient in changing the way you view life thus helping you radiate joy and acceptance.

[DeJjjj]

I believe we all have it in us. No one is not by angry, upset and worried but it takes certain experiences to bring it out.

[DeJjjj]

*No one is born

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

Very much so. I do think it's at least hypothetically possible for a 20-21 year old to think this way and radiate positivity. I think he/she might have to be raised and educated though to cultivate very positive thinking patterns.

Actually if I had my way, I would make at least Cognitive Behavioral Therapy a prerequisite course in public schools since it can really improve our mental health just learning to recognize our negative thought patterns for a start.

My parents and teachers taught me nothing remotely like this so I used to have lots of anger issues as a boy and teenager and I thought there was no way to fix it. I didn't realize the way I thought could influence how I feel and didn't realize I could improve my mood substantially by just challenging the way I thought.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

My wife is a master of this. I sometimes think I married a Zen Buddhist monk given how positively and productively she thinks all the time. When I first started dating, I was in disbelief how patient she was and how difficult she was to upset.

Actually to my embarrassing and guilty admission, after a year or so of dating, I was still in disbelief that she had not become upset a single time. I was starting to think maybe she hides being upset from me at least sometimes. So I immaturely tried pushing her buttons a bit just to see if I could see her get upset. and I had to really push repeatedly until she finally lost her patience. Then I realized, "Okay, at least she's human! It's possible to make her upset, but man, it takes a lot of work!" After that I apologized profusely and explained why I did it and never did it again.

[exitseven]

Hardly never. Most armttractive people are pretty self centered

[laly520]

very rare