- 1 y
I get it , you want to date and yeah why not but let’s be honest how many people your age end up marrying their partner years later … I’d say it was a very very small percentage. My advice.. having lived through it.. just have some fun and take no relationships seriously until you have your life on track and you can be completely independent in every sense of that word
00 Reply
Most Helpful Opinions
- 1 y
Yeah. You’re 18. There is literally no need to rush into that. Just relax, spend time figuring out who you are (if you’re like the rest of us you probably won’t really figure that out until your mid-to-late 20’s.)
Have fun. Travel. Focus on friends & definitely family, more than dating. When It sort of just happens naturally, it’s the best anyhow.00 Reply
- 1 y
I mean you're under 18 what would you expect? You're dealing with boys not Men. I'd say focus on your studies, friends and family for not. You got plenty of time to date when you're older.
00 Reply
2.4K opinions shared on Dating topic. No. A person's dating experience reflects more about them than it does the opposite gender.
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What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
26Opinion
- 1 y
You are the one who picks these men. Why don't you try picking a guy who is different from the guys who have been pumping and dumping you. Maybe take a guy out of the friend-zone, because your best orbiter is the best man you qualify for a long-term relationship with.
56 Reply- 1 y
It’s not their fault that the men they’ve dated are bad men. A lot of toxic relationships start with someone acting all lovey-dovey and gentlemanly and then further progress into making the other person feel trapped in the relationship.
- 1 y
@thatshydork there is a saying: if you meet one asshole a day, chances that person is an asshole; if you meet ten assholes in a day, chances are you are the asshole. The only common denominator in all these different relationships is her. She is chasing Chad and Tyrone which ignoring the decent guys who would treat her well because they aren't hot or exciting enough.
- 1 y
Ok so let me ask you this; if a guy is charming and sweet and gentlemanly in the beginning but an asshole later on, how is she supposed to know when a guy isn’t just trying to fool her into thinking he’s a nice? Oh wait, she can’t. Also, you have no idea why she’s rejecting the other men, so stop assuming that it’s because she “doesn’t think they’re hot or exciting enough”. Sometimes you just don’t vibe with someone, no matter how they look or how exciting they are. I know I’ve rejected quite a few guys just for the sole reason that I didn’t know enough about them. It had absolutely nothing to do with whether or not they were hot or exciting.
- 1 y
@thatshydork you just told on yourself by saying "it wasn't my fault, how should I know they were going to be assholes?" followed by "I reject guys all the time because I don't know enough about them". You are picking the wrong guys, I know you have at least one guy in the friend-zone who would be a good boyfriend to you but they aren't Chad so you never give them a shot.
- 1 y
Never said “it wasn’t my fault, how should I know they were were going to be assholes”. Maybe that’s what you inferred, but that’s not at all what I said. Also, just an fyi, the guy friends I have are either gay or already in a relationship or both, so no, I’m not going to take any of them out of the friend zone. If you’re referring to the guys I’ve posted questions about on here, I’m not friends with any of them. We might get along, but I wouldn’t consider them my friends because I don’t keep in contact with any of them.
- 1 y
Dating is lesrning about yourself and others. If you have repeatimg pattern take break and learn and stsrt over. We all have to do that.
The hormones and lack of experience spell disaster for a lot of relationships.
If you didn't grow up with them and they lacked good trainkng then there's gonna be suffering00 Reply - 1 y
No, you just need to improve how you choose men to get with. I don't know if taking a break makes you better at this but it may be helpful to reflect and rethink your previous choices to see what you can do better. It's like learning to ride a bike. Falling and hurting yourself is part of the process.
00 Reply - 1 y
Perhaps go into yourself. See if it's your preferences that are keeping the bad decisions of dating these men or if it's just the men you pick to be with. Not all men are bad but not all men have the best mind when thinking about girls. If you'd like to, feel free to PM me and we could go more into depth with this
00 Reply - 1 y
Be very deliberate in your selection of men. Contrary to what people at your school think or do do not take it lightly. Your young but don't fall into the category of what every other girl does.
Be extremely cautious/slow in your behaviors with boys and ultimately that will show you which ones are genuine and real.
00 Reply - 1 y
Big emphasis on "boys". emotional intelligence is near nonexistent, in younger people... and even in many adults, but younger people tend to focus on sexual impulse. Not saying to go after thoughs over the age of 17... due to obvious legal reasons. But look for red flags and dont let them pressure you. Getting to know someone before relationship is really important.
00 Reply - Anonymous(36-45)1 y
Most guys your age aren't ready for a relationship. Taking a break from dating isn't a bad idea.
36 Reply- Asker1 y
But I don't know how to just be bymyself, do you have any tips?
- Opinion Owner1 y
Having a good friend group is helpful.
- 1 y
I agree with anonymous. You're under 18, take this time to learn how to just be by yourself, you might find that you like the person you are, or maybe you won't like who you are, and this would be the perfect time to make yourself into the person you want to be. That process may take you into learning new hobbies, or going on amazing adventures, and in that process you may just find the perfect person for you.
- 1 y
Not knowing how to be by yourself is a good indicator that you might need a break from dating for a while (not trying to be rude, just trying to provide some incite).
- 1 y
Lots of older lads aren't ready for a relationship.
- Opinion Owner1 y
True, but by 30 it starts to turn around.
- 1 y
you're dumb if you really think a whole gender is all bad. and you're under 18, you're NOT going to find serious relationships at that age
10 Reply - 1 y
No, not every man is a bad man. There are a lot of bad men out there, but not every man is a bad man.
10 Reply - 1 y
you're a child, so yes. Tale a break. Dating at your age is a joke. No one is mature, everyones still growing, you're living under your parents’ rules…. Wait til you're older
00 Reply Shouldn't you be focusing on your education and career? It says you're under 18, how many relationships did you have?
00 Reply- 1 y
There are plenty of good men out there, but if you've had nothing but bad experiences, take a break. It's rather easy to. Just hang out with your friends if you feel lonely.
00 Reply - 1 y
Why are you picking guys that don't treat you right?
27 Reply- 1 y
It’s not their fault men have been treating them badly. Don’t blame them for men’s bad behavior.
- 1 y
@thatshydork first off it is her not their. Secondly I am not blaming her. Read the damn text again it is a question. Why would I ask her why she keeps picking guys that don't treat her right? Hmmm let's think... oh maybe because by her own admission it is more than a couple. So it implies that for some reason or another she is more drawn to guys that treat her poorly even though she doesn't like it. Her answering that question is the first step in her being able to change whatever is causing her to pick shitty guys. Hopefully she is capable of more accountability than you seeing as your first reaction is to immediately absolve her of anything and everything that may have lead to her having this experience. Think damn it think!!
- 1 y
First, you don’t know that, so don’t act like you do. Also, their/they’re can refer to anybody. Second, when you phrase something “why are you”, that’s accusing someone. Third, I know I’ve met my fair share of men who act all kind and innocent at first but turn out to be complete and utter assholes. Fourth, I’m not absolving her of anything, I’m just giving her the benefit of the doubt. Fifth, maybe try putting yourself in other peoples place before speaking. Then maybe it wouldn’t be so hard for you to comprehend the fact that maybe these guys are making her think they’re all nice and sweet but they’re actually assholes. Think damn it, think!!
- 1 y
Sorry meant to put they/their/them/they’re
- 1 y
@thatshydork thank you for proving my point. Once is understandable cause you got tricked 2+ times? So you learned nothing from the first time and fell for the same lies and fake personality. Yeah seems like you benefit from the exact same question why are you picking guys that don't treat you right. Why are you is not accusatory is one of the basic starts of a question. Who, what, when, where, why, how, and many other words all function as being the start of a question. Accusatory would be this "you are the one picking guys that don't treat you right" notice the lack of a question mark changing it from a question into a statement... perhaps you should look up the definition of an accusation. You really shouldn't try and be clever unless you know what you are talking about. Lastly try putting myself in her shoes I did hence my question of "why are you picking guys that don't treat you right?" If as a guy I dated a toxic woman people would go "fair you made a mistake" if I did a second time or a 3rd or a 6th etc they would began asking me "why are you dating toxic women if you don't like how they treat you?" Their are many different kinds of people so the question focuses on why that particular type of person.
- 1 y
First off, I never said I was the one who fell for the tricks, I just said I knew a bunch of guys who would act all nice and shit until they trapped the other person in a relationship. Maybe you’re the one who needs to stop acting all clever. Second, I don’t know a single person who wouldn’t take “why are you choosing bad men?” as nothing but accusatory. If you don’t see it as such or how someone could take it that way, then I hate to break it to you but you’re indeed not putting yourself in other peoples shoes. You can barely see past your own nose if you can’t understand that it’s not someone’s fault if someone else is being toxic to them, no matter the amount of people who have done that to them in past. I suggest you try wording it better next time you try to ask someone a question like that because while you might not think of it as accusatory, a lot of people do. We hear it all the time as an accusation hidden in the form of a question. “Why do YOU choose bad men?” how about instead you ask men why they choose to act that way? It’s not the victims fault if someone is being toxic to them.
- 1 y
@thatshydork Let's break it down shall we nice and slow. Hypothetical scenario. You want a good relationship.
1 you go out you look for a guy
2 you find a guy you like
3 you go on a date or several
4 you find out he is toxic you end things
5 repeat step 1-4 x times.
Alright x guys in and you have only had toxic guys so far. You are the one picking the guy of course. Obviously you aren't picking the toxicity but you are picking the guy. Note the difference. So if you have picked 7 guys in a row and all 7 have been toxic. The common denominator is you. Therefore the logical approach is "am I missing something that would clue me into these guys being toxic before I go on dates with them?" At no point is it your fault how they treat you. Which is very clear in the formation of the first question and the clarification second comment. But that does not change the reality of the question. There is some part of you that is either attracted to or ignoring the signs that the person is toxic and as she doesn't want that she would have to identify what it is causing that. If you are to began finding the guys you want you need to be able to identify what it is that is causing you to end up with shitty guys. Again it is not applying fault (which you somehow don't understand) it is asking what is causing you to be attracted to the guys that end up being shitty. Are you attracted to the way they talk or dress or is it because they are in certain places that you frequent etc. Many many variables that could factor in to why one is attracted to people that end up being toxic and at no point does it mean they are at fault. Do you understand it yet? Or do I need to find another way to explain it?
m
1 ySome are, some are not, you are best taking a break, do schooling and then consider later on.
00 Reply- 1 y
No. While I have my negatives -- like my laziness and my sarcastic and snarky personality -- I'm neither an abuser or a cheater? A liar? Mostly just to annoy... Or, if my room is messy.
00 Reply 3.2K opinions shared on Dating topic. you've encountered some shitty boys indeed.
00 Reply- 1 y
Be careful, there are a lot of peeps on this site.
02 Reply- Asker1 y
Wym?
- 1 y
@Asker There are creepy people on here over 18 who might try to talk to you and dm you. Dont do it. Even if they swear there under 18.
- Anonymous(18-24)1 y
Take a break. You’ll be doing the right thing.
00 Reply - Anonymous(45 Plus)1 y
Yes. If you repeatedly have the same problem at some point you have to accept the problem is not THEM, it's you.
00 Reply - Anonymous(25-29)1 y
At this age both girls and boys at terrible at relationships
00 Reply I’d say take a break and try to focus on whatever is important
00 ReplyAll are not same. There are only few boys who are shitty
00 Reply- 1 y
You're too young , please don't be a femcel
20 Reply How many men did you dated at this young age?
00 Reply5.1K opinions shared on Dating topic. You're a child don't worry about dating.
30 Reply- 1 y
What are the terrible experiences?
05 Reply- Asker1 y
Got played, cheated had to fight one of their hoes (I won 😜), got ditched and I done some bad things for them
- 1 y
You won, good job. Well the best thing to know is do you love yourself? If not then take a break from dating and work on you. If you do love yourself then keep dating and learning.
Have you learned things from those experiences? - Asker1 y
Yess definitely
- 1 y
Best to keep reflecting and learning then. If you feel like you can be a benefit to someone then why not date?
- 1 y
Can you be by yourself for a while?
Yes. they are. I feel sorry for you.
00 Reply2K opinions shared on Dating topic. The boys you deal with are clueless.
00 ReplyI don't think you should generalize
00 Reply- 1 y
No it's you
00 Reply a lot are
00 ReplyNo of course
00 Reply- 1 y
no..
00 Reply
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