How do you know you’re ready to date again?

[KittygosMeoWW]

Is it possible to become too used to being single? lol I don't know but I’m feeling a little too comfortable in the idea I will never be in love again.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

For me after my worst break up (we were actually engaged to be married), I really thought I'm done with dating. So I gave up trying to date completely.

Still, I wanted to have good friends so I made a bunch of friends, more than I ever did before. Then hung out with them all over the place: home parties, picnics, barbecues, weddings, birthday parties, hiking, camping, traveling to new places together (rent giant hotel rooms and share them), etc.

I met my wife through that experience at a picnic. She was a friend of a friend. After a year of hanging out, we were so into each other and constantly at the edge of the parties wanting to talk to each other while our friends would have to shout, "Hey, you two are missing the party!"

Then one day our friends all left early leaving us alone in a bar. So we started to dance and she kissed me and I kissed her back and after that, it seemed silly not to start dating. So I asked her on a date.

Still, I think it helped that I stopped looking for a date and even somewhat allergic to the idea. So I think it might even be healthy to quit dating completely as long as you socialize and meet new people a lot and spend a lot of time in good company. Then you might still discover your perfect date even though you weren't looking for one.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

As for when I knew I was ready to date, it's when my wife kissed me at that bar and I kissed her back. In the process of dancing and making out, I realized I want her too much. I wanted to start spending more private time with her and not just together with all of our friends. That's when I realized I was ready to try dating again.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

I think when we're actively trying to date, our standards plummet. Even if we try to maintain our standards, we have a tendency to compromise a lot. When you absolutely don't want to date and have given up on dating as I did, you maintain your highest standards and that's why I think it's a healthy mindset. You only consider dating in the most exceptional and extraordinary of cases as I did with my wife.

[Jamie05rhs]

@GuyAnswersGirls123 That's a really good point. I think I know what you're saying.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

@Jamie05rhs Cheers! 🤝

[NathanDavis]

I've actually quite comfortable, still...

but, I've never really seen it like that, if the moment happens and I meet someone that's truly interesting and intriguing for me... I know very well that I will be all up for it

although, I am not actively looking for dates... never done that, really

[laly520]

depends on how fast u will heal
some take weeks some take years
healing journey isn't easy but manageable

[DoggyDude]

For me, you know when a smile from someone carrys you a way to the point your so distracted by it everything feels pointless without the smile. Then your ready.

Putting it another way, if your asking yourself if you should date again I'd say your not ready.

[MikeTheBartender]

You don't truly know till you throw yourself out there ;)

[KittygosMeoWW]

Ew I’m a throw myself back in my house, I don’t want anyone’s crusty evil son.

[ChicoFromThe305]

You should know when, seems like you have found peace being by yourself tho

[KittygosMeoWW]

I think so, I don't know or I’m still too traumatized. Got hit in by a really cute guy at the store and I just mean mugged him the whole convo he was funny and I was so uninterested lol I was more interested in st pattys socks.

[ChicoFromThe305]

I think the funniest part of your story is that you found it funny lol

Either ways tho kitty I think the real question is do you care to be ready for dating again or nah? 🤔

[KittygosMeoWW]

I feel like I should want to try to find that person one day and tbh I’d like for my daughter to have a good male role model but the thought of wasting time on someone who’s not 💯 or is mentally/emotionally unstable again scares me

[ChicoFromThe305]

Yea I can most definitely understand that, mostly when it's not even about just you anymore but your little duckling as well, you gotta think for two now, but I'm with you on a good male role model being a good thing for the little one, I think you should just be patient but open to the idea of it, you have experience on bad men, you can use that to detect good men from the crowd, fear can be a roadblock sometimes and It can stop you from something great for your life and your ducklings life as well, it's something worth thinking about, til then I don't recommend stabbing people with your eyeballs 😆

[KittygosMeoWW]

I’ll stab anyone I want with these 👀👀👀👀

[ChicoFromThe305]

Well at least I tried to save society from them 😂

[Sevenpointfive]

what's stupid is that there is a calculation for this. but girls need very little time to regain their resolve

[KittygosMeoWW]

Wut…….

[Sevenpointfive]

it's true. i believe guys need 3X the relationship time and girls need 3 days lol

[Nice222]

For me I got very used to and happy being single. It was at that point I met my wife. “The perfect woman for me”. For awhile I actually rejected the feelings. And her interest. But eventually I excepted her and it has been great ever since.

[Bklynbadboy12]

Sure you be in love again your only 28 you still have a lot of living to do plus falling in love is the one thing we can't control

[noohair]

The memo.