Why do some girls avoid the question of intimacy while dating? Why do girls want a relationship without sex?

[Anonymous]

[Finchie40]

Because most females’ need to feel respected , she doesn’t want to just be considered a piece of ass , she wants a guy that likes her for her , her heart mainly, Not just what’s in between her legs , When a girl feels valued and appreciated by a guy, she will have no problem having intimacy and affection with him , because she feels safe and protected by him. She doesn’t want to be with a guy that just wants to fuck her , she wants a guy that listens to her and talks to her , has deep conversations with her , opens his heart up to her. She needs to feel that connection and chemistry with him before she even considerers having sex with him. If she just wanted to get laid? , she knows she can easily go get laid and knows a bunch of guys’ will gladly fulfill her wants. If she wanted to be a whore? She would just go be a whore.

[TonyV]

Well my take on it is...

If they are dating you, and they are dating to marry, then they plan to have sex with you.

That dosent mean they plan to have sex on the first or second date and they don't need to here you talk about it so early cause it makes you sound like all you care about is getting in their pants and not getting to know them.

Basically they want it to be unspoken, so you will be better off if you set s time limit that you don't tell here about, 3, 4, 5, or 6 months and if nothing has happened you break it off.

Long story short they ignore the topic cause you bring it up too soon.

[WintersDaughter]

Because there's more to a relationship than sex. Sex isn't even in the top ten most important things in a relationship.

If a man doesn't want to be with me because I don't want to have sex with him, then he's not the kind of man I want to marry and raise children with.

[Asker]

I am a MAN. I need sex. I am not ashamed of it. I can't have a relationship with a woman who refuses to discuss about intimacy or refuse to check sexual compatibility before wedding.

[WintersDaughter]

"Sexual compatibility" is a bs excuse to have sex. Just because you're a man doesn't mean you need sex, you don't need it. You want it. There's a difference.

Discussing the topic is fine and should be done, actually having sex can wait until marriage.

Some of us have standards ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

[Asker]

If she doesn't want sex before it's her choice. I respect that. I don't force her to sleep with me. But avoiding the topic of sex is immaturity.

[WintersDaughter]

Avoiding it can be, depending on why they don't want to talk about it.

If she's already told you she doesn't want to do anything sexual until marriage, there's not really a point in talking about it again and again unless something new pops up.

If you just started dating, avoiding it is fine.

[Haraklus]

Sex is easily in the top 10 most important things in a relationship. Probably the top 5. If you're not having sex, you're just friends.

[WintersDaughter]

@Haraklus Sex does not define whether you're in a relationship or not 💀.

Do you kiss your friends? Hold their hand? Are you vulnerable and intimate with them (intimacy isn't sexual most of the time)? Do you discuss settling down and raising a family together with your friend?

Sex is at the bottom of the list on what's important in a relationship. The very bottom.

Also, you can have sex with a friend and still be just friends, so your logic is already flawed.

You do realize that married couples can go years without having sex, right? Sex doesn't make or break a relationship, if it does then you're shallow as fuck.

[TheRealPepperPotts]

I can see wanting to discuss intimacy and clarifying expectations. But the consequences of having sex without security are too great for many women to risk it. And sex, like most things, is a SKILL. It takes practice and learning and vulnerability and giving. I don't read anything but selfishness and entitlement in your remarks. "I am a MAN. I need sex". Well, sir, go find a hooker, then. Masturbate, then. You can have sex all you want. You just may not get to have it with a woman who actually cares about you.

No quarter for the entitled "I am a MAN. I need sex" types; no quarter.

[Haraklus]

I actually went through about 2 years of a dead bedroom in my marriage, so yeah, I'm aware. But let me tell you, it really sucked for both of us. It wasn't ever our #1 priority, but it was also never not a priority. But because we love each other, we worked through the issues that were causing it, and now I don't know if I could be happier. And I'm almost certain she couldn't.

That being said, I would -not- have stayed if we didn't start out as magma hot lovers.

As far as kissing goes -- that's basically sex lite, so no, I don't do it with my friends. It is an inherently sexual act by nature. Unless we're talking about a platonic kiss on the cheek or something, in which case I wouldn't rule it out in a friendship necessarily. Hand holding -- eh, I have held the hand of a couple of close friends a couple of times in my life. Kind of in jest, but grounded in companionate affection, and being very happy to see them after a long absence, or having achieved something significant together. Vulnerable and intimate? Absolutely. Mostly around a campfire deep out in the woods. Try it. It's such a wholesome experience to be vulnerable with your friends.

To say sex is at the bottom of the list... I mean... I feel sorry for your partner if you genuinely feel that way. Sex is inherently an enormous part of being a living eukaryotic being. I'm sure that for a small minority of people it's at the very bottom of the list, but for the vast majority of us humans, it's much, much higher, at least until we get pretty old.

[WintersDaughter]

Well I'm glad that worked out for you.

I only date Jews, so yes sex is at the bottom of the list for me and for every man I've been in a relationship with. Because we know how to actually have a relationship.

You do realize that sex psychologically does something to your brain... right? It unconsciously creates an intimate bond with the person, which is why "sex buddies" almost always ends with someone catching feelings.

More people than you think don't care about sex.

[Juxtapose]

This is total garbage. My mom told me very firmly when I was a prude myself that you want to check sexual compatibility before marriage and you shouldn't be afraid to talk about it.

Also what separates friends from lovers is physical intimacy.

[WintersDaughter]

Sexual compatibility is nonsense. It was made up so guys and girls had an excuse to have sex.

You shouldn't be afraid to talk about it, but that doesn't mean you should do it.

Physical intimacy isn't the only thing that separates friends from lovers. You literally have sex with random people, that doesn't mean they're a lover.

How you love your friend vs how you love your partner is completely different (even tho some are similar). The actual love you hold for each other is different, the way you view each other is different, how you talk and interact, the fights and arguments and conversations are all different.

There's more to love than sex.

[TheRealPepperPotts]

@WintersDaughter Totally agree. I think people sometimes forget that sex takes practice, and who better to practice with than the person we are spending the rest of our life with? Sex is not an automatic and seamless activity that we just know how to do perfectly. That's another reason I agree that the compatibility thing is nonsense, too. Basically, guys want hot sex without effort or investment. Even if we are "compatible", what on earth will a guy do when his perfectly compatible wife is suddenly not compatible postpartum?

[laraWM]

Some migt want it. But also it's not the first thing that should come in mind when dating someone

[Princesspd]

We want sex as much as men. We are just more conservation and being cautious so we don’t get label as easy.

[Asker]

I understand that. If we don't talk about intimacy, sexual compatibility and kids. How do I know she is the right woman or not? How do we are check sexual compatibility? I hate it when women call me pervert or creep. I wanted to discuss that topic not sleep with them right away. It's was just a conversation.

[Haraklus]

In my experience, women are actually more receptive to having sex early on rather than talking about it.

[Asker]

@Haraklus It's hard to understand women. They want to talk about finances but not sex. I told many girls if you talk about finances then I will talk about SEX.

[captain_voidwalker]

Because in this day and age this is a woman's ideal partner

[Asker]

All women want to discuss about property, cryptos, stocks, money 🤑💰 and finances. But they want to discuss about sex or check sexual compatibility before wedding.

[DishLady]

It’s not that we don’t want sex, it’s that we want a RELATIONSHIP, which is about more than just the sex. The sec can be nice with the right guy, but the other factors are more important.

[Asker]

Whenever I use the word sex with girls, girls started over reacting and shouting at me as if I am going to rape them. I want to discuss about sex like a mature and civilized man. But they treated me like I am a big sex offender. It's not my problem if they are not comfortable with it. Why not discuss it openly if girls want sex too?

[boggboss]

Because many fear its the only reason a guy wants to date them

[handsomelad70]

Lots of women believe being too desirous of s*x may make a man think her slu*ty, or she may find s*x physically or emotionally difficult.

[Asker]

But I believe that if she is not comfortable with the topic of sex then she doesn't know about sex, she is not interested in having sex and she is not going to serve her pussy after the wedding.

[ProbablyClueless]

Immaturity and generally not understanding how to emotionally connect with men.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you are dating the wrong woman? Or doing something consistently which is putting them off? It might not be woman.

[Juxtapose]

Stop dating prudish women who are frigid ice queens. Go for women who are hornier and can handle an adult conversation.

[DextroShade]

They want a relationship with Billy Betabux to not have sex but still have him do everything else while they fuck Chad and Tyrone.

[Jackblue]

aren't you a little old to be repeating incel ideology

[thisAppIsGarbage]

Do they? I've never experienced anything but the opposite. I can't find a woman that wants anything but sex.

[elaphe]

Some want to wait for marriage. Some guys do, too.

[HelpfulWoman]

a relationship is more than just sex.

[Asker]

I agree with you but the relationship depends on the sexual compatibility. If she is not good in bed then I can't stay in that relationship.

[HelpfulWoman]

okay, but thats what you're prioritising. its not the same for other people.
not understanding that is a bigger flag to me

[Seo-Jun24]

Ah dostum sadece korkuyorlar, onlara biraz zaman vermeliyiz.

[Fromdusktilldawn]

they are clearly not attracted to you