How come girls don’t like to lead relationships?

[chris_987]

It’s seem like a lot of girls are waiting for the right guy to come and sweep them of there feet. Wouldn’t it make more sense to be more active in finding relationships. Cause I don’t feel compelled to put in more work in a relationship than what a girl is putting in. If she put in zero effort then I put in zero effort. I think that’s why a lot of girls reach there 30’s and there disappointed with men because men never put in the effort she thought they where supposed to put in.

All I can say is that I’ve never been asked by a girl or even had a girl text me first to get to know me. So whatever effort I put in it’s based on the lack of effort they’ve given me.

[ThongQueenFlirt]

From some of the opinions I read, you all would say I'm silly or crazy. But trust and believe I'm not either one. What's wrong with women taking lead sometimes? There are times, men love when a woman takes the initiative. Especially in the bedroom. I let them know from jump street That I like to be in control at times. But I always say I don't mind sharing that control. They would have a very big smile on their lips, that I make the first move. I lead them the way I want it to go. He knows when to take the lead. When it's time for the orgasm he knows what I like, while he enjoys it too. I don't lead in everything. I just want to know when it's my turn lol.

[chris_987]

It’s odd to me that women say men should take they lead but they don’t treat us like leaders. Like when you at work and your boss tells you to do something you don’t question there decision. But in a relationship women don’t look at men like there the leaders of the house hold. Society tell women that men can’t survive without them and that we have and ego and make bad decisions all the time. So to me the answer is simple if women are being told not treat men with respect anymore. Then you should only be with a women for selfish reason because they’ve already been brainwashed to not treat you like your the leader of the home.

[MzAsh]

Most women prefer a man to qualify themselves to her first and then she reciprocates the effort afterwards.


If you want a woman to lead in asking you out then you should expect her to want to be the leader throughout your relationship too, because those are the only type of women asking men out. A woman isn’t going ask you out and then be cool with you trying to act like you wear the pants. So first you need to figure out if you’re ok with that.

[chris_987]

But your logic is flawed, because no man once he gets a women can lead her, she is never fully submitted to he his leadership that why she test him all the time. So to me the only option men are left with is to cheat lie to the girl and then dump her once he’s bored. Because ultimately the amount of effort she put in can’t compare to what I put in

[MzAsh]

I don’t believe most women want to be lead in the same way men want to lead, and the two sexes aren’t seeing it, so they end up with someone incompatible.

[chris_987]

So then I was right. A man should just use a girl for sex because she will never put in as much effort. So we should decide what we want from them.

[MzAsh]

If you’re a low quality man who never wants a decent woman, sure. But that’s not what I said.

[chris_987]

But I wanna know what makes a woman decent? And what makes a man low quality?

[MzAsh]

A quality man and woman will both put in effort, but it’s rooted in biology that men prefer to pursue women first, and that women prefer to be pursued.

[chris_987]

Biology is something physical, what you stated was a preference not biology

[MzAsh]

It’s the way the brain is wired in men and women.

[chris_987]

No you could argue that men only pursue women because women are afraid of men thus leading to the proving that he isn’t a treat to her.

[MzAsh]

Women aren’t pursuing because they’re afraid of men. It’s because women are wired to select the strongest masculine man who can provide and protect her and his potential family, and him pursuing her is part of the vetting process. If he’s not willing to ask her out, she’s thinking oh boy, what else isn’t he going to do?

[chris_987]

That assumes she gonna play her role and follow his directions. You can demand that men lead you but then not treat him like he’s competent

[MzAsh]

Some might not, but some might. That’s why it’s called dating. You get to know to someone and find out if they are going to be a good fit for you.

[chris_987]

No your missing the point women and men are changing. And society is telling women that men are stupid so if more women believe that there not gonna think your average man can make good decisions. But I’ve made my point so I thinks we are done here.

[MzAsh]

Some men are stupid. But so are some women. Smart women know which men are smart and which men are dumb.

[chris_987]

Ok well thanks for your input

[MzAsh]

No problem

[Anonymous]

Women evolved an attraction to socially dominant men, because dominant men are more likely to be able to provide for them and their offspring. Cave girls who liked betas that need to be helped through life, ended up starving to death.

One of the many ways women naturally filter for these dominant men, is by letting men lead the relationship. Weak, submissive men, and to a lesser extent, equal men, don't do nearly as much approaching because they don't feel like they deserve women.

[chris_987]

If that the case why would they test dominate men? If a woman’s natural instinct is to test men then ultimately the more power you give women the more there gonna take away from men. You could make the argument that when men had all the power there where more dominant men cause you could just divorce you wife without any repercussions, and if she got out of line you could hit her. There would regularly show a man hit a women that wrong him back in the fiftieth. But now the only dominant men are criminals and serial killers. Which is why 50 shades of grade and other romantic works are so popular with women, cause our society has taken away all the power from men and now your average man doesn’t hold that power anymore. So that’s why I said it makes no sense for women to expect men to lead when we’ve become less chivalrous and more equal overtime.

[Kaneki05]

I have never lead to ask anyone out. And yet i have had exs. So it does happen :) Just gotta find someone who likes you and will try to spend time with you. Eventually it comes out that she likes you or you both like each other. But yes i did wish more women would do it but then again all my exs have so... Lol

[Aliceinwonderland22]

If a guy wasn't willing to put effort in a relationship, I'm not interested. If they can't be bothered, neither can I as I'm not putting effort in and wasting my time either.
Assuming all women wait for prince charming is a big assumption, and if you haven't shown any intrest in someone do you really think they would show intrest I'm you?

[OliviaZoey]

I wouldn’t care honestly. It will always be his lost. I know my worth, so technically if a man is lazy and shows no effort then we will never be and I’m fine with that.

[chris_987]

What effort do you provide?

[OliviaZoey]

None whatsoever

[chris_987]

Most girls don’t so your not special

[OliviaZoey]

To you I’m not special. But that’s all

[chris_987]

No your not special because you act like most girls

[OliviaZoey]

Uh huh.

[scarlett774]

I’ll definitely put in effort but I’m just scared of being rejected or him not having the same feelings as me which is why I tend to be a little more reserved when making the first move

[andreasderjuengere]

But that's a downward spiral?
Think of it like this: to 'surrender' own claims on leadership, and to 'follow' others loyally takes a lot of personal effort and quality.
As much as a ship needs a captain - it needs -qualified- sea-men as well.

[WowwGirl]

Becaues we assume a man would want to being he's a man and all. If we wanted to lead we would just get a girlfriend

[WowwGirl]

Which many do

[chris_987]

Why assume such things. Isn’t that like men assume a woman would want to cook and clean for her husband

[hellacray]

If they lead it means they need to start paying for stuff.

[NorthwestRider]

My fiancée leads our relationship and I prefer that

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Because its not natural for a woman to lead a man in a relationship.

[chris_987]

I should be if women say it not natural to take care of her man

[Anonymous]

I like to feel the red pill community has changed my perspective on this

[Sevenpointfive]

Same. i need to be earned as well