Does your mother have an influence on your dating life?

[Lexusbocht]

Met a guy on Bumble. We started speaking online, and after a month, we attended me to his sister’s wedding. This was in his hometown, a small traditional town, where I met his entire family. From his mom to his uncles. Even was a part of the family drama about a partner one of the girls was dating & brought that the family did not approve of. We spent four days with his family. His family were excited to have me, as I was the second girl he’s ever brought home. After the wedding, he went back to his country of residence.

I asked about our relationship, he said he liked me a lot but wanted to stay friends.

Recently, now a month - after the wedding, his family published a family video on YouTube & he was so excited that I was included in it. His mother told him to show it to me and she also inquired about my well-being as her “daughter-in-law". He then went on to say how he thinks his mother likes me. Since then he has started being more affectionate and telling me how amazing I am etc etc.

Side note: His family is very traditional. He’s 29, and I’m in my early 20s, so I think that maybe the age is what's stopping him. But I really like him. Despite his statement about staying friends, I'm not sure what we are doing is just being friends. I'm not sure if I should bring up the conversation again or just go with the flow.

[MrOracle]

Other than the basic morals and values they instilled in me growing up, my parents have never had any direct influence in my dating life. Or much else, for that matter. I've always been independent and forged my own path. My dad wanted me to follow his career and even offered to pay for college if I did so (which he couldn't afford to do), but I payed my own way and did my own thing.

[meepmeeperton]

That seems unusual that he would do all that and just be "friends"... it seems like he did special things for you he would not do with just friends. 8 years isn't the craziest age gap ever, and it tends to work out better when the man is the older one due to how fertility works with the sexes. I doubt a traditional family would have a problem with that...

As far as your question goes, no, my mother does not have an influence on my dating life. But she does love my girlfriend a lot and is exited for us to give her grand kids some day. She would just be happy that I'm with any girl who treats me right.

[SueShe]

No, nobody has any influence on my dating life because they know better not to interfere with my wishes. I did make it clear to my family that my life is my business and nobody else's and if I made a mistake, it is my responsibility.

That being said, I don't date and I am not in a relation. Thus it does not even matter if my parents would interfere because there is nothing to interfere with.

I have decided to set my priorities and those priorities do not involve a relationship, simply because I do not want to divert my full attention with something that I do not find important at this point.

[butterly248]

She used to. Before my current boyfriend, she never found out I was dating. It wasn't anything much in high school and college.

When she met my boyfriend, she didn't like him. After a few months of dating, she persuaded me to go onto dating apps. This caused issues with me and my boyfriend.

When we did repair our relationship, my mother found out we had set before marriage and kicked me out of the house. I stopped speaking to her last year and never felt better.

I'm now in a 6-year relationship with my boyfriend and we live together ♥️

[butterly248]

Sex before marriage *

[TommyMountainFigure]

Let's say you're happy going 'with the flow' and he keeps on saying you are 'just friends,' at some point it sounds like he's going to break things off with you. Are you prepared for that? If not, then you need to re-define the parameters of your relationship.

And to answer your question, my parents tried to decide who I should and shouldn't see when I was in my teens. That all went very wrong, so since then I have made my own decisions!

[Lexusbocht]

Thank you for this.

May I ask why you think he's going to break things off with me?

[TommyMountainFigure]

Of course. If he sees you as just friends, that is not the view of someone thinking long term.. it is nothing more than would be described a fling.

[Lexusbocht]

Hmm I hear you. However, I would like to point out the fact that flings are mainly focused around sex and no emotional connection. Our relationship/friendship is not focused on sex. Er are not having And we do have an emotional connection😅

[TommyMountainFigure]

Sorry, yes 'fling' was a poor choice of word, but the premise of the term 'friend' was what I was referring to. I wasn't suggesting anything change either within the relationship, only the term 'friends' status should be altered to something more meaningful.

[Lexusbocht]

(I apologize for the typos in my previous response)

Well thank you Tom. This was very insightful. Have a great week :)

[TommyMountainFigure]

That's Ok I never noticed any typos, and you are most welcome @Lexusbocht. Have yourself a great week too :D

[Purpleronnie]

I told my parents straight growing up that my choices were mine and I could either have their support or do it without it was their choice. I think they admired me being forthright but didn’t really like it but they did accept it. Nothing worse than overbearing parents trying to live again through you so listen to them you should , as they have life experience that’s given them understanding but ALWAYS MAKE YOUR OWN CHOICE !!

[thatshydork]

I think culture plays a big role in this situation. If he’s from another country, this kind of thing might be more normal there than it is in the states.

[CrabCakes11]

The only thing my parents influence when it comes to dating is whether or not I tell them if I’m dating. Due to their track record, they do not know about my boyfriend

[DreamLife7]

🤣🤣 you seem like u aren't able to make healthy decisions. Why are u going online for dates instead of going out like a normal person. Second ur calling a man u don't even know ur boyfriend. Yeah u have issues girl

[Lexusbocht]

Leave it up to an illiterate person to come online, leave tons of rather silly opinions then call themselves normal😂😂Pfft lmaooo you're a joke.

[DreamLife7]

Aww your rebuttal for being desperate , insecure and unattractive because you can't go out and meet people like a normal person

[Lexusbocht]

😂😂Look who's talking...

[DreamLife7]

Yes , you 🤣

[BetaBucks]

This is only acceptable if he's middle Eastern or Jewish. My mom's white so she never give af about my dating life.

[sheikalana]

My parents never had any influence in my dating life.

[Iron_Man]

No she lets me figure it out, but she always gives me an opinion later on she’s very wise

[TommyMountainFigure]

She DOES sound wise.. so what happened :P (please please realise this was me jokin' about)

[Iron_Man]

@TommyMountainFigure That was a long time ago. The girl was a bust from the dog track when I was in my 20s. She worked there I owned racing dogs

[TommyMountainFigure]

I started off by being curious about how that relationship went, but you raced Greyhounds? That is far more interesting

[Iron_Man]

@TommyMountainFigure Thanks well, I was a greyhound owner and I helped out and I also did some stuff behind the scenes helping out the kennel plus doing some training but the kennel actually trains the dog, and feeds the dog and the dog stays at the kennel when not racing

[Iron_Man]

That was before now they completely shut everything down in Florida no more greyhound racing

[TommyMountainFigure]

That's crazy.. Why did they do that? I mean many have closed over the years here, but we still have a thriving Dog Racing Sport here.

[Iron_Man]

@TommyMountainFigure I believe it was due to mistreatment of the animals, and sometimes they would put the animals down when they can no longer use them, but I was never a part of that and I didn’t want any part of that. And I have never seen that. I always kept and took my dogs home when they retired

[TommyMountainFigure]

@Iron_Man. As would I have done in your position.(re- the dogs when they retired) I still don't get why instead of closing the whole thing down, they couldn't find ANYONE in the entire State to come up with the idea of having an official body to legislate how it was run?

[Iron_Man]

@TommyMountainFigure I don’t know, but if you’re really interested, try to do some research. It’s all shut down all over Florida.

[Iron_Man]

Why is greyhound racing ending?

In 2022, the RSPCA, Blue Cross, Dogs Trust and GRW each changed their policies to call for a phased end to the activity. This is because we firmly believe that it is impossible to ensure that each and every greyhound has a good quality of life before, during and after their racing careers. Jun 2, 2023

[Iron_Man]

@TommyMountainFigure

There are only two operational dog tracks remaining in the United States, both in West Virginia. Commercial greyhound racing is illegal in 43 states.

[NathanDavis]

nope... not at all

[IslaTheWitch]

lol... nope, it's my life not hers :D

[Theodoricus]

To be honest, yes. Because I trust her maternal instincts.

[SkatPak392]

my mother completely derailed my dating life as a teen.

[Theraingoddess]

My mom controls my life so much like it even bothers her who or what I watch

[Fatal96]

If I did have a dating life, the answer would be no. My mom is pretty cool.

[RebelinSteel]

Nope not since I was 13

[LiamJHayden]

She would if she were still alive.

[impalabill77]

No my mom died when I was 12.

[Anonymous]

All my loved ones do.

[slatyb]

No, never.

[jahaims]

No lmfao