What is the dating hierarchy?

[Anonymous]

Let’s say not your attractive and people say you should go for unattractive women but what if you are rejected by them too

[meepmeeperton]

I don't think a succinct hierarchy exists. Sure, there are women who manage to sleep with guys who are more attractive then them who just want sex, but that isn't exactly an enviable position...

I would say girls who are "mid" and shy/dorky would be good for you to date because they won't have experienced a lot of male attention and won't be overly focused on looks.

[Asker]

I get rejected by them too when I say no women are attracted to me I mean literally none I’m practically invisible

[meepmeeperton]

How many women have you asked out and how did you ask them out? Like did you get to know any of them at all before asking them out, did you do it in person or on dating apps, etc?

I'm not gonna lie to you and say being unattractive isn't a big disadvantage, you've probably been through a ton of crap in life and that sucks. But I was the same way for the majority of my life--no female attention at all or girls actively teasing me that I'm too ugly and quiet to get a girlfriend--and I still found a loving girlfriend.

[Asker]

So I don’t actively approach any like I said I’m mainly ignored and even with not approaching I get zero matches on dating apps so I must be hideous

[meepmeeperton]

How are you ignored? Do you have a job with female coworkers or go to social events where women will be around and they just don't go up to you? I wouldn't really count that as rejection, you have to actually ask a girl out and have her turn you down to be rejected. Lots of men do terrible on dating apps, they suck and are not a good representation of how women perceive you.

[Asker]

Yeah I have female co workers but I have largely always considered that I’m rejected because they don’t talk to me or approach me

[meepmeeperton]

Women are rarely gonna be the ones approaching... I mean sometimes they'll make excuses to talk to you if they like you but a lot of the time you'll have to initiate the conversation and make them realize you're an interesting person.

[Asker]

Yeah I don’t really talk to anyone

[meepmeeperton]

Well, that'd be a good place to start.

[Asker]

But the thing is you can tell if people are open and receptive and most women appear closed off towards me

[meepmeeperton]

Women have a way of warming up to men sometimes. If you gain some confidence and have a more dominant or assertive energy, more women will respect that and be interested in going on a date even if they weren't initially interested just from looking at you.

[Asker]

No women would warm up to me

[meepmeeperton]

You didn't even try brotha...

[Asker]

Because I don’t want any accusations made against me

[meepmeeperton]

What--like you're a creep or something LOL. I mean that could be an issue at work but elsewhere who gives a damn women start rumors all the time about anyone they don't like.

[Asker]

The problem is if you have autism or anything that impacts your social skills people quickly attach labels to you

[meepmeeperton]

Yeah that's just life for an autistic dude. It sucks but you can make your lack of social skills paired with intelligence seem eccentric when you play your cards right. Everyone gets BS labels attached to them too.

[Asker]

Yeah I always believed my strong attributes would find me a good relationship because I’m very intelligent, I’m loyal, hard working

[meepmeeperton]

That will find you a relationship, but unfortunately it will require more work of actually initiating conversations with women, which will be hard for you. But it will pay off.

[fhaofhrnwpalxbr]

Maybe you went for girls who may not be the most physically attractive but really smart or got great personality or anything else. And maybe they didn’t think you were on their level on those other aspects.
Also many people can tell when you approach them thinking they’re “unattractive” and you’re settling for them. That’s a major turn off as it communicates that you don’t have a genuine interest

[Asker]

So I’m also really smart and I have a good personality so what do I do I’m not being desperate I’m just staying within what people tell me

[HappyWoman34]

I read your comments about your fears of being accused as something bad. Most women are nice, as long as you approach them respectfully.

[Anonymous]

here's the hierarchy and it's based of rarity aka supply and demand

rich, famous, handsome men are at the top and have the most options

beautiful women are next in line

average women are next in line

average men are way down next in line on par with ugly women

ugly men don't even exist on the hierarchy

[BetaBucks]

Agreed, and you left you out ugly women. Who are also above average men.

[4ngelic]

typically people go with people around the same level of looks

[CrabCakes11]

That’s subjective. Trying to making a subjective thing objective never works

[Anonymous]

I date for everything

[Asker]

What do you mean

[Opinion Owner]

I did a girl that’s got good moral values that I want to be around and enjoy her company. I don’t think about I want to get in her britches.