Opinions on this?

Question

He always tells me that he likes me and that he wants me and enjoys spending his time with me.. that said he’s been chasing me for almost a year now and overall we’ve been talking for two years almost BUT I don’t feel it I don't know if it’s because we’re long distanced or not but I tried to believe his feelings and when I’m about to tell him “yeah maybe I have same feelings for you” he ruins it right before me confessing my feelings he ruins it with his delayed ass messages that don’t even do much bc of how cold they are.. he never posts new pics of him although I ask him to do so and he just plays it off cool saying he doesn’t have any new ones which I certainly don’t believe.. He never asks me questions that show how much he gives a damn.. Never to dive deep down into the conversation.. never sends me gifts or something sweet such as a reel on Instagram expressing his damn love for me and it goes on and on… Y'all tell me if I’m tripping or he doesn’t love me like he claims!! Mind y’all I did once hint about me starting having something for him so he should know and instead of ruining it every time he should know how to win my heart! On the other side, he kinda cares when I ghost him he’s always the one to text first saying how much he misses me and how he can’t complete his day without me and when I did no contact with him he still came and left messages saying hope everything is alright and even shared food pics with me as he usually does, not to mention when I tried to push him away from me he insisted that he would never give up on me and blah blah blah I don't know but I’m hella confused!

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Uhm girl be for real. You’ve talked to this guy for 2 YEARS, he’s always the one who had to initiate conversation and you give him nothing - you even say you try to push him away. And you’re holding it against him that he’s not doing enough, is not expressing his love and not SENDING GIFTS? Why tf would he do any of it if you show him you don’t want him? Why, be for real, would he go and express his love and send gifts to someone who ghosts him and try to push him away? Tf. What do you want? Him to come riding on a horse and sing love songs outside your window whenever you ignore him? All while you don’t want to let him know you might feel something too because he took too long to respond? But yeah you’re right, he probably doesn’t love you that much anymore as you’ve spent the last 2 years being an asshole to him. The ship has sailed so to speak and you’ve created a situation where this could never lead anywhere because it’s too late for that now. At this point it’s been so long that he knows (or thinks) it will never go anywhere between you but keeps messaging out of habit and boredom. Next time, if you want to date someone or see where things could go with a guy then actually make some sort of effort and contribute to your relationship. You can’t expect anything coming from sitting in your home and ignoring the guy and push him away, clearly making it seem like you’re not interested. If you want romantic gestures you need to give the guy some sort of clear sign that you’re actually interested and his efforts could be appreciated and result in something good.