Is it approp. to buy a girl something, if you're not even dating yet?

[Anonymous]

I'm debating getting something small for her, that she might enjoy, but, im not sure what sort of guidelines there are when it comes to that sort of thing. I know girls appreciate when men do it, but, like, im not sure

Updates

1 y

Just so y'all know, we are going out on a date this weekend. Well, it's not a date, but it's not not a date. Hard to explain.

[Anonymous]

As long as your not co-workers especially you own female Boss because my ex boyfriend actually has lied about buying "just gifts " multiple times & then goes purchases all these different items from Bath & Body works which included very nice scented candles, even some perfume which I was shocked when he met me up and didn't even give me the perfume which I was like looking at him like what the heck? Because I asked him who are those for and then he questioned said aren't you happy with the candle. Lol 🤣 which I was never believe he would tell me that, It was only for his co-workers and had the whole audacity when I question him after he left me that if a guy gave me any jewelry would have him would he be upset and on all truth he actually said yes If it was in jewelry and anything romantic which I didn't think candles wouldn't be romantic especially those nice perfumes that I didn't know his female co-workers needed to be showered since they all like boyfriends or fiance's because one of them actually was getting married that year Nice wedding gift right 👍

[Anonymous]

There are no guidelines to dating because everyone is different and all the same things for one relationship won’t always apply to another. Treat her like a friend right now since thats currently still what she is and deserving of the same casualty right now. Would you buy something small for a female friend because you thought she’d like it? I think you’d at least be more open to it than when you tell yourself it’s for a crush.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't. I was told by a woman before I ever started dating. You NEVER bring a woman flowers on the first date (this kind of falls under that heading). Why? Because you've set unrealistic, unsustainable expectations right out of the gate. You have to give her that to work for. So when you do it it's appreciated.

[Dongie]

Do you know said girl? If you don't leave it alone.

[Asker]

yes!

[Dongie]

Well, buy her something then. Why do you feel the need to ask?

[Dongie]

There's nothing wrong with it if you two are friends.

[DishLady]

Some guys do go to the trouble to buy a smell thing as a show of interest. I’ve gotten a couple of very sweet gifts over the years and it’s simply to show appreciation, though with the intent of going out. It’s something traditional guys will do as an initial signal of their attention/affection.

[Asker]

Yes, sort of. It's believed that the original idea of a man buyiing a girl something, was because he wanted her to like him and all that, but, these days, it's sort of changed. I went ahead and bought it, I just, was, debating it.

If you'd like to know what it was, it was just a $20 ish (with shipping) mug, that says "I work all the time, so i can buy expansion packs for my sims". She's a sims streamer. She plays it online, and i guess streams it or whatever. She works a lot too, so, I figure it would be funny and cute. I'm just not sure if I should have bought it this early on. I told her I did have a surprise for her, and she said "ooh, i like surprises", so, it's not like it was a bad thing, just, curious what she's going to think about it

[DishLady]

LOL. That’s actually pretty cute. (Sorry for the typos by the way. I’ve had a really bad day and rushed a few posts.)

Girls like to get little gifts. Just not anything heavy-handed. Some guy once offered to buy me a condo and I gave him such a look bc it made me feel like some cheap thing, so I refused it and didn’t see him again. But my FAVORITE guy gave me a funny bday card if Van Gogh with an ear in it. (If you knew the story, it’s nerdy-hilarious.) I still love that gift and appreciate the thought behind it.

[Asker]

I wanted to just show i was listening. I know girls don't expect us to "fix" things, or "do things like this", but, i wanted to show i was, so, i was like, hm, she'll like this

[DishLady]

(Secret between you, me and the walls? Sometimes we DO want our man to fix and do things and just make us feel safe and warm, like everything will be ok… Go figure….)

[Asker]

Then why say you don't

[DishLady]

(I don’t… you’d have to take it up with the particular gals who say that.

[Asker]

hmmmmm

[jennifer_bloom]

The main thing is, if you want to buy a girl something, you have to first make sure she is single and not in any kind of flirtation with an interested guy.

[avery58]

I mean if you buy her gifts even small ones so early on then she might keep the same expectations later on? I'm not saying it's her case cause I don't know her but some girls have no problems asking for gifts or money from their boyfriends.

But it's your choice.

[Asker]

yeah

[Truthatanycost]

Quite often the guy isn't trying to buy her a gift, he is trying to buy attraction...

[Asker]

It's there already, i just feel like it might help it

[Nikki1989]

Absolutely. My friends and I are buying each other things all the time.

[the29thhuman]

If you’re consistent at getting her little gifts, then be prepared to keep up with that. Guys typically stop the good treatment once he’s got her as his girlfriend.

[Billlewis]

Sounds good to me;)

[JamesRandiDebates]

Never ever ever spend money on a girl until after you have drained your balls into one of her orifices.

[Asker]

lol, wellllll, while it's not exactly, false, it's not exactly true either. I'd have to explain later

[DaddyDiablo]

Sure if you like her n won't use it against her or be dumb n try n use it in a sleezy way like so long as it's with pure intent it should be fine

[In_Trance]

I'm sure whatever you buy her she will share with the guy that she's fucking

[Asker]

she's single. and isn't dating anyone

[In_Trance]

Whatever helps you sleep at night

[Anonymous]

Don’t buy her shit until you have been dating for at least 6 months to a year.

[Vegasrunner]

You're making a huge mistake and are risking being placed directly in the friendzone.

[RedInnocent69]

It depends on the relationship. For a colleague or friend, sometimes.

[Gabriel-Chicanito]

Nae. It just means, you're trying t' win'er!

[Asker]

what?

[Anonymous]

A little something is fine. Just don't go too crazy.

[OddBeMe]

I spent 5 mins on approp. Give me my 5 mins back.

[Asker]

what?