Why are women so jealous of each other?

[Anonymous]

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I think woman who victimize themselves are the ones like that. They believe that they're in competition with other woman for all the deseriable guys.

And they buy clothes and get injections and fix their nose and do drugs, all because something in their head is going

"it's a contest, it's a race, he's looking over there, why isn't he looking over here"

One thing I noticed dating a bunch of times was that woman would get crazy jealous of my dates and try all sorts of things to fuck up our relationship while trying to flirt with me. Or the flirting would stop when they saw I wasn't like that and then all of a sudden their friends were trying to cause issues.

I think they can't stand the thought that there's anything they need to work on except looking like a porn star because it makes them feel better to be able to be like "men are simple, they just need something to look at"

And then they see a woman who they decided doesn't look as good as them with a more deseriable man and it pisses them off.

Not all woman, but certainly a lot of the ones in New Jersey

[Oncewildtwiceburned]

Women like that at least tend to love sex and you…just a little added benefit…or detriment later if you grow tired of them/fall out of love/in love with someone else. I feel bad

[Oncewildtwiceburned]

Their instincts like these can lead them for into a lonely life

[blueonblack22]

It’s partially biological. Historically women had to compete with each other to be attractive and viable to high value men. For most of history having a high value man who could protect and provide for a woman could make or break a woman’s livelihood (even survival).

But it’s also societal. Women get a lot more leeway to outwardly to show negative emotions (fear, jealousy, insecurity, etc.) without losing face compared to men. We both know that all men feel those exact same negative emotions but we got to internalize them and deal with them via other means.

Women may “say” they are okay with men who express their negative emotions but they really aren’t. Women see emotional men as just more relatable and less threatening (because subconsciously they see them as just acting like another woman) but they don’t see that as romantically attractive. Again feeling relief around a man is NOT the same thing as feeling attraction. In fact it’s a huge romantic turn off for most of them whether they are willing to admit it or not.

[Anonymous]

Women are set against each other and people want for us to compete. I am not gonna lie and say i don’t feel jealous because i do. But i don’t do anything about my jealousy like i don’t hurt other people because of it or show hatred i just internalize and have a conversation with myself about how i should center my focus on myself and on only myself not other women not other men not my negative feelings but just myself and that gives me a lot of peace. For example i have a lot of jealousy and self hatred issues. I also like a guy at work but everyone ships him with another girl because she looks the best. So i felt very intensely about this today i stood infront of my mirror and i just said to myself i don’t care about him, i don’t care about her. All that matters is me. I should worry about just me. This helps me navigate my jealousy if anyone is interested.

[JFelix]

That's really mature of you to realise that, and two things, firstly don't try to bottle everything in trust me it's not worth it because one day it will have to come out, secondly don't worry about what others say about that guy that you like, just because others try to ship him with her doesn't mean he's just got eyes for her, try to throw him some hints, plus in the end of the day if he doesn't like you I'm sure someone will, you seem to be really mature and kind

[jennifer_bloom]

I don’t get jealous of others. I am happy for women who succeed. The exception being those who delight in my problems. Or those who try to glorify themselves instead of God.

[Summeroflove]

Things get passed down through genetic memories, there once was a time where polyamory was a thing so as you could guess, you can find stories in the Bible even if one woman getting all the love and affection from the husband, while the other wife was a hated.

Back during these times when men married many wives, these wives had to compete with one another for the love and affection of her husband. There’s a reason why women are attracted to men who have a lot of women around them. Then they compete with these women.

People may play what seems to be really stupid pointless games to which they are, but it can be a good thing to know where it comes from. That’s why women are often jealous of each other.

[HawkPerception]

Both men and women are jealous of each other and it's because of competition in terms of dating.

It's usually only the immature ones that tend to get jealous.

Although I do admit I am jealous of dudes with bigger dicks 😂 If I hear my partner was with a dude bigger than me, then I can't help visualizing 😅 Other than that though, I don't care if a dude is better looking or better off financially than me.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Spotted 🤣

[HawkPerception]

Ahem ahem... mine's a decent size, but not a monster so... it can be a topic of insecurity 😂

[Crimsyjo]

Extremely common insecurity. Maybe as much as women worrying about their breast size. Or thighs.

Thing is... I've been learning that guys don't notice as much or care as much about our flaws as we imagine. Majority of men are happy with a range of breast types and size and equally the majority of women are happy with the majority of penis sizes out there!!

[HawkPerception]

Yeah honestly boobs size doesn't matter and I speak very bluntly on that. Dick size (no matter what women say) on the hand, does matter to an extent 😅

[Crimsyjo]

Haha you can so easily say with such conviction that breast size doesn't matter but not accept that I can equally say the same with conviction too?
I know media, tv and a certain amount of tik tok and Instagram "influencers" perpetuate the idea but I can promise you that ordinary women are not so shallow. And yes like there is a certain freshold.. like below 5" is gonna be difficult unless width makes up for it. And over 8" or 9" is gonna have issues. In my opinion anyways. But the large majority of men I think and in my experience fall with the range of 5" to 8" so absolutely no problem. If looking for a relationship, there are many many more important qualities and any lack (which i doubt there is) could be made up for with different techniques, toys, oral, foreplay. Men just place SO much worry on one thing. I understand why but as a woman we can't help shaking our heads. Just like you guys scatch yours at the absurdity of a lot of our worries lol

[HawkPerception]

But that's the thing. It's the threshold I'm talking about. And you just said it yourself.

Anything under 5" (which a lot of guys are... not me luckily) is usually considered too small for many girls. And between 6 and 8 is where the size difference can matter in bed and where the competition is.

Anything over 8" or 9" (meaning some girls actually prefer 8) won't necessarily have issues, because at least they know they'll be able to fill the girl (maybe just not put the whole thing in).

It's more competition for the perfect dick size whereas boobs are beautiful in all kinds of sizes.

[HawkPerception]

It's not like boobs have to satisfy anything on a man. Sure they're fun to watch jiggle during sex, but other than that they're there to look good and get fondled, licked, and sucked.

[HawkPerception]

https://badgirlsbible.com/does-size-matter

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Listen to Crimsy for she speaks truth usually unheard from mortals !

[Crimsyjo]

Well some guys absolutely don't like a girl under a C cup and some like small breasts that fit in the hand like a A or B. And many like a big boobed woman over a DD. So not all men accept a range of boobs just like there are women who have specifics with wanting a 9" or whatever. But I don't believe these are in the majority. Or they don't know what they are talking about and are influenced by TV and what they think must be best.
I personally would hate for the cock to not be able to slam all the way in and nice and hard. I think i cd make it work with almost any cock. I say almost because I'm sure their are exceptions and I'm always hesitant to say a definite "all" over anything in life.
But as I said I think there are other ways to make sex enjoyable and the best.
Do you think a majority of men are under 5"? In western cultures? I'm not sure where or how accurate statistics on this would be but I've only experienced one cock in life that was "too small". And that was based largely on no width as well as no length. An absolute accurate depiction of the phrase "pencil dick".. .. I swear it's rare tho! Really rare!

[thearchjoker]

Evolutionarily speaking men and women evolved differently under differing pressures. Men had to survive hunting in pre history and wars once we got to history. This means men's traits evolved to make them survive combat work in a tactical group and self improve. This is why sports and the gym are so attractive to so many men. Women on the other side had evolutionary pressure not on surviving combat but being selected by the best mate. Their weapon was not the spear or the sword but the word of mouth and reputation. Many women enjoy gossip because evolutionarily speaking it is a very useful tool. It can be used to gather information, spread rumors on ones rivals and allow one to make herself appear more valuable. Men evolved to kill instead of being killed women evolved to select and be selected by the best partner available. Neither is superior or inferior men and women are different and have evolved under different pressures thus behave differently. once you observe your question through such a lens the answer should be easy for you to understand.

[Dongie]

Smart little shit.

[StyngRay]

This is not actually how evolution works.

[Crimsyjo]

I can actually resonate with this better than the other equally interesting opinion of @summeroflove - tho both are identifying a similar theme of being about selection and competition. As women's resources used to be dependant on the male it makes sense that the "favoured" female got the best pick of resources.
I like that.
I am a jealous type and I do want to be 1st and best in my man's eyes. And I also believe in making him my number one priority and best too. I'm used to men being jealous around me too and I kinda like it. As long as it doesn't become controlling to the point I can't be me and then lose my attractive power (for instance men will be attracted by the way I dress but then jealous and want me to dress differently. Which then ultimately makes them less attracted to me!)

It's a mixed up world now tho because men are reluctant abd even bitter about women who want resources from them. And a lot of women pride themselves on having their own, equal or greater resources than man! So how does this work anymore?

[Summeroflove]

@Crimsyjo yeah I think it’s a mixture of things. But I think that at some point people realize they want something more fulfilling.

It’s normal to want to be the only person in somebody’s life male or female. If people don’t walk in the flesh, then they can find someone truly amazing. Especially if they aren’t lead away by the lusts or their hearts

[Summeroflove]

@Crimsyjo and I think it’s a mixture of what I said and what this comment said. There is genetic memory that is passed down and passed down.

Men have stuff too it’s not like it’s just women. But I think this comments very valid too.

[RavVid]

A female academic psychologist at University of Melbourne, I think on Chris Wiilliamson YT channel, made the point that another women's success makes other women feel really bad. In contrast, men tend to respond good luck to him, he earned it.

Usage of the words jealous and envious varies between US and UK (& Commonweath?). Jealousy is sexual to me and envious is of possessions.

I think it comes down to beauty. A woman's beauty is her coin in more than just sexual ways. Beauty also gives intra-sex power. A very beautiful woman could find a younger woman arising to exceed her beauty. Beauty is ephemeral, it and the power it gives has a short life.

Of all the possessions a woman has her beauty is the most personal - it is her.

Despite the meme "we are all beautiful", women are innately aware it is not equally beautiful and never has worked that way.

[Crimsyjo]

Very true. But seeing less attractive women doesn't make me feel better. But seeing more attractive women knocks my self esteem and confidence big time

[RavVid]

@Crimsyjo It shouldn't though because it is just skin deep

[Anonymous]

My best friend (kinda my only close male friend) has a step niece whose family died when she was a teenager, she has cousins and lived with her aunt. She was the prettiest woman in that family, maybe ever. So even though they felt bas it was truly difficult for her. I could tell my friend’s heart was broken for her, and he’s usually pretty cold to such things. He showed her kindness whenever he could, I’m not saying her family didn’t either, it was usually under duress of obligation instead genuinely.

People treated his sister like that and she ended up with a multi-millionaire that loved her like no tomorrow.

[noohair]

It is cavewoman brain. When the guys were out hunting the women were gathering food. That is a competitive process where one person finds more and some don't find anything. Women have been competing against one another for 100,000 years. It has not changed.

[Crimsyjo]

I don't know if i see food gathering as competitive? I'd imagine the men way more competitive with who was the better huntsmen. And in the old style way back days of hunters gatherers I think women were much less competitive and much more supportive of eachother. Mothers and grandmother's helping with the younger women's pregnancy and birth. Passing down wisdom. Maybe the younger ones were more competitive for the best male to provide and father their children? But I feel women used to be more nurturing to eachother and understanding. I imagine it's when the need for co-operation became less and everyone began to think of themselves that it changed. Maybe more to the later era where like the others said a woman needed a man for support and survival instead of a communal survival and so the best man was highly sought after.

[noohair]

@Crimsyjo Hunters have to cooperate as a group to get the most game. It was sticks and spears and the group was better that alone. Women were competing for limited resources. If a woman found good food, she did not call over others. She took it all for herself. That makes her look better in the eyes of the men. I am Talking 100,000 years ago.

[Crimsyjo]

I'm not expert enough to base this on archaeological fact but... I thought the whole point of gathering was to take back to share. Maybe a little nibble here and there but generally a much more communal survival instinct. Just as you say with the hunters. Everyone played their part and pooled their resources for the good of everyone not individually.

[noohair]

@Crimsyjo Ok, then where does the Jealousy come from? They did share but one finds and one does not.

[Crimsyjo]

I don't think jealousy started then that's all I'm saying. I think as people evolved to not hunt and gather (start building towns and farming and growing crops so people could settle and not move around) I think jealousy maybe waa born from the ending of hunter-gathering. Nobody had to be jealous back when it was understood that to survive you pooled resources. Now suddenly the concept of "yours" and "mine" was born. With that concept I think jealousy was born. And it just got worse and worse as humans needed eachother less and consumerism grew. The more items we gather that is not related to survival the more jealousy there is.

[Oncewildtwiceburned]

@Crimsyjo sharing? People were individuals with familes to feed or mates to impress just as today

[Crimsyjo]

@Oncewildtwiceburned I don't know how far back we talking but I guess looking at tribes that still exist today the men went off and women seemed to enjoy being together, supporting eachother, talking and working together. Children (families) were - and still are in less individualistic societies like American/Uk - a more communal effort. Not my family your family. Aunts uncles, cousins, neighbours, friends, all helping and aiding eachother.
I've seen on TV a man living in what we call poverty go struggle work all day and come home to his shanty town home and say he was happy. Of course TV may lie. But I think jealousy mostly exists due to the society we have created and the mindset to push other people down to raise oneself up.
I'm guilty of jealousy too. I'm just saying even when a part of it and stuck being a part of it there is still awareness that we are a selfish lot of people these days. And the more selfish others are the more selfish we have to become to survive it. Like ever heard expressions like "charity starts at home". We are born and raised to think 9f ourselves and our immediate family first. Which doesn't feel wrong. But yes jealousy arises from the differences around us in wealth and status.

[Oncewildtwiceburned]

@Crimsyjo okay, well native women here stab each other

[Crimsyjo]

@Oncewildtwiceburned where you from? America? That like my country and a lot of Europe is one of the individualistic countries. The American dream is all about having not giving.
I mean today jealousy is everywhere. But I think women in Eastern countries like China and India are less jealous of eachother? Maybe. This is all speculation and my opinion of course.

[Oncewildtwiceburned]

@Crimsyjo i have experience with Asian families they are no exception whatsoever! Its less of a violent but just as insidious as other races, women are JEALOUS from the shores Tripoli to the hills have eyes

[Crimsyjo]

@Oncewildtwiceburned haha ah OK. I can't argue with your insider knowledge and experience! 😄

[missindiana93]

Because we hate what one has. Rather be intelligence or looks.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

What makes you think it doesn't affect all genders? Look around 😅

[avery58]

Aren't guys the same way? Hence why they don't like comparing dick sizes etc

[Telekinetic-Potato]

We don't talk about that because there are so many other ways of measuring someone's worth as a man that guy's actually care about. Most guys who brag about their dick are seen as unmanly and empty. It's not out of jealousy. It's out of having a good foundation for self worth.

[JFelix]

Comparing doesn't mean men are jealous, half the time it's just a joke or curiosity, men even joke about their small dicks, and I don't think any man actually deep down envies another man for having a big dick, so I wouldn't call it jealousy

[Telekinetic-Potato]

@JFelix there are definitely men who get mad that people don't get jealous about the fact they have a big one though 😂

[Apple1996]

Can't say I've ever been jealous of another woman

[beefcakebradybatson]

Women are historically socialized to compete for men, and since the Women's Rights era, for job promotions (the "Queen Bee" syndrome).

[Crimsyjo]

Queen bee... yes. Its defo a thing!! Tho I think it is better when a Queen finds her King. Then the security that gives (if he is stable and loyal) leads to a woman happy to help her female companions rather than be jealous of them.

[Nikki1989]

The same reason men are. It is a human trait that most of us have.

[Kingofkings1992]

Lol, that’s not true

[Dongie]

Nope

[Oncewildtwiceburned]

Men are jealous of attractive dudes? Sure but not very often. Not to the extent that women are jealous of attractive women. We get more jealous when we see an ugly fat jerk with a job he got from his dad with a beautiful woman that he treats like crap

[Dongie]

Sounds like an actual happening @Oncewildtwiceburned

[Oncewildtwiceburned]

@Dongie yep, just another Monday

[Dongie]

Rainy days and Mondays always spark my imagination.

[Oncewildtwiceburned]

@Dongie me too, I think of a northern coastal town by an old lighthouse and people wearing yellow rain jackets for some reason.

Im more jealous of decked out new 1 ton pickups with loud whistling diesels with a slight lift rear and front steel bumper steel grill installations. Even though my pickup could go more places off road with me behind the wheel

[Dongie]

I like that imagery. Maine, with a few giant boulders getting pounded by rough seas.

[Radiate143]

I would LOVE to know! Following this question.

[LiamJHayden]

A lot of people are jealous of others because humanity is filled with fallen, covetous people.

[Damaged00]

Because they see other women as competition.

[Nerdvana]

Because they are insecure about themselves, and take it out on others.

[Dongie]

They're caddie shrews that's why!!

Right girls?

[PrettyCrumblBb]

I have never been jealous of anyone. I lack that emotion. 😂

[art84]

Women like to compete against each other.

[Ladsin2]

They're in competition for mates.

[libralove]

Why be jealous when u can support other people

[Anonymous]

Status and competition.

[Anonymous]

Women are like that

[Radiate143]

We aren't a monolith.

[Crazzyyworld]

Golddiggers