Is the idea of an opposite sex roommate good/bad/neutral?

Question

My guy friend and I have been talking about getting a house together? We’re both 23, working in science fields and we get along pretty well

Datboi65 · Accepted Answer

My first couple of years in uni I had male and female flatmates. I'm someone that minds their business and doesn't go out of their way to talk to people if I don't feel like it, so I would say it worked out alright for me. As far as the girls are concerned, they were OK with guys being there, but I sensed like they didn't like each other (there were 4 guys and 3 girls in one apartment).

Two girls were very close and the 3rd one was always with the guys. One of my flatmates asked her straight up why she didn't talk to the other two, and she basically started talking about how she knew them from another university (they're all exchange students) and that one of them was cheating on her boyfriend with a guy that's a n*zi (mind you these are some wild allegations, and I met the guy that she was "allegedly" cheating with and he seemed like a nice dude) among a bunch of other nasty things I cannot disclose here. They had a big fight one day, and then the 2 girls stopped coming to the apartment while that other girl was still with us. I felt bad for them, even though I never really knew them that well.

The girl that made the allegations was a typical "party animal", so my exact opposite. Drunk, loud, tattoos and piercings, and more of a tomboy. She invited 12 of her friends to come over to visit her without asking the other flatmates for permission, and for 3 days I had to wake up every night to the sound of drunk 20somethings coming home at 3AM while I had to prepare for classes the next day. Meanwhile, the girl she accused of infidelity and her friend were more reserved and seemed very responsible and respectful.

Towards the end of her lease, I snapped and yelled at her for paying music on a loud speaker when I had to study for 2 final exams (anatomy and biochem) the next day after asking nicely multiple times and even offering her my airpods. That was definitely the last straw for me. Funny thing is, she tried to flip it on me and act like I was the villain, when she got a ton of noise complaints from neighbors too. She left a couple of weeks later, and so did the other 2 girls, and I never heard from them again. Since then, there were may be 2 more that moved in who were far less dramatic and fit well with the rest of the flatmates.

Overall, I would say I was lucky that it wasn't worse than that. The guys were very cool, and none of us really flirted with any of the girls. It was more of a family setting if anything, and I can say I have some fond memories from that time. I think with the right people you can make it work, but boundaries are extremely important, and it definitely helps having separate rooms.

I have since then moved out into a studio apartment and I currently live by myself. There are definitely some perks to being alone as opposed to living with other people, but the same could be said about having roommates. I would say what helped us best was probably that we didn't know each other and were mostly introverts, but if you are moving with your best friend then you probably have to lay some ground rules.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I couldn’t do it. Most men befriend women they want to screw. Not all the time but a lot. Two, just in my experience, not every woman, but the girls I’ve know, the women, they’re dirty. Clothes all over, don’t clean. Their cars are even worse. I came out of the military so I like a clean living space. Plus as a man I can’t do what I want to do in my own place w out having to wonder if she’s there or not. Like walk into the kitchen naked to get me something to eat or drink. Not to mention what if she invites a number of her friends over. I don’t care for all that noise, cute or not I don’t want a handful of girls there. Just the same if I was like that I don’t think she’d want my rowdy friends over. Most people are never truly happy unless they’re in their own place to do as they please.

TsundereMatrix · Accepted Answer

I think it’s fine if you have boundaries set and everyone is okay with it.

WhitneySnow · Accepted Answer

A house is fine as long as you have separate bedrooms

ohsheeT · Answer

You could work out I mean but you have to have rules and you have to have respect. I mean I don't think you're going to like 10 of his friends over there every night or every other night staying there until whenever but yeah you can work out you just have to have common courtesy and respect each other that's all

AviatorTom · Answer

It depends on the roommate but it can be very good. It's a good way to meet members of the opposite sex, friends of the roommate.

WindAtMyBack · Answer

I've done it multiple times. It was never a problem. Of course you can run into the same kind of problems that any room mates can have. The only thing specific to a man and woman being roomies is if one of them is a creep and won't leave the other alone. But if you trust the guy to not be hitting on you, then it shouldn't be a problem.

You need to be compatible with things like noise level, temperature, how you will deal with food, how clean/messy you are, etc.

MikeTheBartender · Answer

Not bad at all. As long as neither of you want to fuck each other. There will be no problems. However this sounds a little odd? Is this a roommate situation or are you buying a house together? Buying a house with a friend is much different from renting with a friend.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Even if there is no attraction, other problems can occur. One is a slob, the other is a clean freak, for example. If you do this, even with another girl, make sure you are on the same page and understand each other's boundaries.

Telekinetic-Potato · Answer

Just make sure you have enough toilet paper that's all I'm gonna say

RingOfFire · Answer

Can't recommend it. I've seen a lot of problems with that in your age group. Better to find another female. It's hard enough that way, but when you add in male and female complicates it even more.

EnjoytheDay777 · Answer

It's fine. Tons of people have both gender roommates.

Anonymous · Answer

It depends if you're dating your roommate. I'm assuming you're not. And if not that could definitely be a problem if you date a guy.  All this kind of hinges in your relationship to your roommate.

SuchSightsToShowYou · Answer

There's a better-than-average chance that this guy will sooner or later try to bang you.

the29thhuman · Answer

Separate rooms, both names on the lease, use legal papers and not a verbal agreement

Nifrayu · Answer

It's a good idea for the most part. Sharing a residence can significantly reduce the strain of the cost of living.

Raaj4you · Answer

Bad idea. Why do you want to live with a person of opposite sex? Is he your boyfriend? Or do you want to have a live in relationship with him?

art84 · Answer

I couldn't do it especially if my roommate was attractive.

Tomisworthless · Answer

I doubt you guys have never had sex given you live together

Anonymous · Answer

I had a girl roommate for a couple of years. She was great.

jjj101010 · Answer

Housemate or roommate? Sharing a room may be strange but a house not so much

woahhh152 · Answer

You both will end up having sex for sure

FunkyMonkee · Answer

I did it a few times. Once with two girls.

Ladsin2 · Answer

Why not start with dating?

Shq1pe · Answer

Lmao. Y’all are banging sooner or later

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

Makes no difference

Saggitariusdiva · Answer

it depends.

Radiate143 · Answer

Bad idea.

TheCaller · Answer

Good idea

Anonymous · Answer

Bad idea

Walksbehindtherows · Answer

bad idea

Hotboy_booblover · Answer

Great idea

Is the idea of an opposite sex roommate good/bad/neutral?

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Is it okay to have a roommate of the opposite sex?

Is the idea of an opposite sex roommate good/bad/neutral?

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Is it okay to have a roommate of the opposite sex?

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