Do women undestand how difficult dating is for men or do they just not care?

Question

I know men aren't entitled or owed anything so please don't assume that's what this question is about. I just want to know if women are aware of how hard the dating world can be for men. From getting rejected a ton and ton of times to getting mixed signals to having comepete with other men for a woman. It gets so chaotic that some men just decide to give up and not try anymore. They figure it's not worth it. With all that being said, do women understand or do they just not care since it doesn't effect them? Which is fine

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It's not that they don't care but a women unless she's already dating a man her needs to her will ALWAYS supercede that of a man. So if you tell a woman how hard it is for you her first thought is of all the difficulties she has and how it's harder than a man's.

Now I'm not trying g to have a pissing match here. That helps no one. But if there's one thing I wish women understood and that's something you highlighted, which is the communication aspect. All women think they're just this irresistible thing to a man. And all the guys need to do is really understand her. And he'll be hooked. He'll want no other woman. And good men DO only want one woman. But the problem is we can't divine whether you're that woman in 5 minutes. It takes time, it takes effort. Effort that many women simply do not want to give.

I wish women understood that a man take 10 times the emotional blows a woman does. How does that work. Men have to ask out 10 women to get one yes. I know, women consider this a man's job. I don't have a problem with that. But women don't understand is that is just the FIRST hurdle for a man. Even after than 1 in 10 chance pans out. That doesn't mean a relationship will. And guys have just as much invested emotionally in it as woman does.

What I'm trying to say is if a woman was ASKED to do what men do in the name of love, they wouldn't even do it. They'd just stay single. AND they would be BITTER about it.

As anon pink said, "dating can be difficult for both genders". And I'll agree it sucks to be a woman and feel you have to wait for a guy to approach you. But women need to understand it's just the ILLUSION of choice for a man. A man never really gets to choose who he dates. Most guys date who they're relegated to dating. And many of them women don't want to date him either. They just want him as her confidence builder.

morganherrel · Accepted Answer

No they really don't get it lol

They don't understand that the difference in difficulty between dating as a man and dating as a women is like night and day

They probably think men who struggle are insecure or have major issues, because that's what it would take for a female to have difficulty (although even insecure women with issues can find a boyfriend with comparative ease)

I think a large number of men are structurally pushed out of the dating market, and no amount of helpful intervention/support/guidance for these men can change that ratio much.

On the other hand, nearly 100% of women are capable of having success with men. There is no excuse for them, really.

Account · Answer

Bro, at least there are less risks of getting raped or murdered during a date compared to being a woman.

Stop complaining please. You might have it bad, but not that bad.

I haven't met a single woman who hasn't been sexually harassed at least once in her life. Let that sink in.

coachTanthony · Answer

It's not difficult if you are a man. Let that sink in.

SuckOnThisOpinion · Answer

Guys I'm not in your shoes so it would be rude of me to say I "understand" but like I listen and I have an idea of that it can be bad.

I'm personally rather dominant when it comes to dating and like to be in control. I'm also very open/easygoing and usually just approach people, so I don't wait for men to make a move and often actually tell them straight up to just give me the space to do my thing and I'll go for them if I feel like, because in the past men that I was interested in have made a move too early, kinda putting me off and "ruining" the buildup of curiosity. I know this sounds rough and I'd prefer for my feelings to not be that extra, but I didn't chose it you know. And I think plenty of women have similarly hard to predict-patterns when it comes to developing interest. So like, I swear we don't do it on purpose as many of us too have the goal to just fall in love with ya know.

That being said, my behavior sparked many conversations with dudes, also them appreciating me being so direct which encourages them to open up about their usual struggles with the whole part of figuring out when and whether and how to approach someone. How they're scared to cross boundaries but also scared to miss opportunities, and that there's not really a safe way to do it - you may turn a women off by asking, or by asking in the wrong way, but you may, even worse, accidently fucking assault her so it's either a 90% chance of getting rejected or missing chance after chance after chance, or a punch in the face.

To me, this is very obviously due to the patriarchy and to be solved with feminism. Like which idiot came up with men having to do all the approaching work and be dominant? It just makes for women not being able to explore their sexuality, thereby not enjoying sex as much and being insecure so they are less interested in men, and men have no clue what they like because it's neither communicated nor represented anywhere bc they don't know and would get shamed, EVEN BY THE MEN WHO WANT THEM, by actually exploring herself. And then they're supposed to go "convince" (which is an idea that's often implemented in boys' heads as well, I know because they have said it to me in my face several times as a teen) women to be interested in a sexual or romantic relation with them. What. The. Fuck. In which dimension is this gonna work? As you all know, surely not in this one.

I'm all for polyamory in women being normalized and me being officially allowed and respected for having like 5 boyfriends and teaching them all how to life while also teaching my female friends how to enjoy themselves and approach men. I believe I also learned a large part of it from my ex-best friend who is a man-approaching queen as well.

Anonymous · Answer

Women and girls don’t give a shit in my opinion. The common argument women today feel is their view of the past or even the current is a male dominated hierarchy and anything that breaks, discourages, hurts a guy or man will feed her ego, I’m just being blunt. You can be a great guy and buy nice dinners for her but she won’t care. Women go based on emotion and often times it’s irrational emotional not sound emotion, judging on the circumstance. Yes, there are men and guys who are lazy, disrespectful/rude, physically or verbally abusive, cheat. I think women and girls are confused/disappointed with males today — if a young woman has or had a bad relationship with her father and dated some awful guys her world view of guys will be to automatically reject them. I’m in my 30s and I still don’t know what women want, y’all are different it’s not that straight forward with guys. A guy could be 5’7, make $65,000/yr, has his own 2 bedroom condo, good credit, in shape, handsome overall, good morals and ethics but a girl or a woman will say, “ahhhhh he’s not good enough” she’ll keep him on the side for her own enjoyment/loneliness and that’s a POS move.

If a guy even defends himself now he’s labelled as an incel for not taking her sh**. Women then will say I want a man or guy with confidence who’s not gonna agree with everything I say. I’m sorry but this is some straight up immature, manipulative, bipolar disorder shit. I blame feminism for having such warped ideologies.

As a guy, let me be perfectly clear with females reading this, you can be strong like WWE’s Chyna, you can be a great athlete like Catilyn Clark in the WNBA, you can be smart like the best female doctor or lawyer in the country, in all for female empowerment but ladies, don’t get it twisted y’all disrespect me I’ll clap back and disrespect back I’m not gonna be a little b**** who’s so dumbfounded by p****y. I’ll give credit where it’s due, I don’t ever want to force a girl to like me or feel bad but don’t waste my time because of your loneliness.

I want to live in a somewhat equal world, I say somewhat because I know there are obligations guys and men have to do and same goes for women and girls. Guys and men will have advantages and disadvantages and so will women. But it seems to me women and girls want it all but you ask a girl or a woman to clean a sewer, fight in world war 3, be 500 ft in the air doing electrical work that girl will pull the female card very quickly. End of the day I just think females have such high expectations or absurd demands she’s not gonna get everything she wants.

Guys in general would rather marry a 5’2 girl who has a high school diploma, simple admin job that pays $40k, she’s a 6 or 7 in terms of looks but she’s super sweet and super caring rather then a woman who’s a 10, arrogant, bitchy and rich…that’s the difference ladies, us dudes aren’t keeping these high expectations. This independent, work for a shitty company and shitty boss will wear thin with women when they never cared much to have a meaningful relationship with a husband and kids. A female could never be on dating apps or get rejected as much as guys do and still be strong minded, girls break easier then guys and that’s no knock on females but if I try to sympathize if she feels hurt, then I want females to do the same. I want guys to know their value and worth but also to treat a girl or woman right, if she says no, fellas just move on and her be and find someone else don’t stick around for months expecting her to change.

Screenwriter · Answer

It's according to who the woman is and how she was raised. There are women who ARE entitled, and believe they are god's gift to men and there should be a line waiting for them at their door, begging to date them. And they DO NOT care. It's men's jobs, they believe.

Then there are women who think it's as much a woman's job as it is a man's to get the party going. Women have to start conversations, ask men out, pay sometimes, get rejected.

It's happened to me and I move on.

I do believe it's harder for some men than for others for a host of reasons: Finance, personality, looks. Whether they have confidence, senses of humor. This unfortunate situation developed because of gender roles, but there's no reason it has to continue to exist.

I think it should be a mutual adventure. And remember, it's just as hard for women to wait for someone to ask them. A move to the middle of asking being asked, rejecting, being rejected is the best idea. Gives everyone a break. And develops equity in the dating scenario.

errorgoodnameunfound · Answer

"I know men aren't entitled or owed anything so please don't assume that's what this question is about."

Just having to put this disclaimer says SO MUCH about women these days. But I can't blame you for doing so.

I think men are slowly waking up to it. Women CAN turn the tides. But damn, they need to REALLY turn down this egos ffs! Men need to stop simping and fueling those egos too. It's so ridiculous that when men talk about this they LOVE to resort to "WE DON'T OWE YOU ANYTHING!!!" Um. Neither do we. I hope the same women yelling that have money in that purse and gas in their car cause it's a two way street.

But honestly my man, it's pretty unlikely the average woman would ever understand until it's too late or they become trans. They are spoiled af by some things just by having a vagina and they don't realize it. Half of them could NEVER stand the loneliness so many guys push through on a daily basis.

There is a VERY good reason the Joker movie did so well, especially among men. Women and simps ofc didn't understand it. It was the closest thing to the anime "Welcome to the NHK" in recent times. (Which by the way, HIGHLY recommended!) That anime is specifically popular with men for a reason.

LazerBean · Answer

It's not difficult for men. Every adequate male I know could get a girlfriend in a heartbeat of the wanted. Unfortunately, an increasingly large percentage of males are so poorly raised and so emotionally unstable that they are never able to reach adequacy.

MisterWack · Answer

Asker: “I just want to know if women are aware of how hard the dating world can be for men. From getting rejected a ton and ton of times to getting mixed signals to having comepete with other men for a woman. It gets so chaotic that some men just decide to give up and not try anymore. They figure it's not worth it. With all that being said, do women understand or do they just not care since it doesn't effect them? Which is fine”

My Answer: Yea, women know however they won’t talk about it because it isn’t their problem since they have their own set of issues while dating that they spew rightfully onto the world to get things off their chest to feel better.

integrale77 · Answer

I don't think so from experience us guys spend months with an empty inbox on dating sites after firing off multiple emails and getting no reply which feels worse than rejection. No reply means no feedback on your message compared to rejection which at least you have a better idea what you did wrong.

Then there are all the girls who say don't just say hi in your message make it stand out... but your profile is blank give me something to work with we are not mind readers.

Then when your in a relationship women are so changeable with making promises and us guys have to anticipate a change of plans at last min.
Or wanting us to do things at unreasonable times.

lightbulb27 · Answer

Unless they have close guy friends to talk to or informative social media sites... they may not realize. Most people are quite selfish, thinking about their problems and limited in their view to their experiences of others.

I wonder how many women have read men's books or magazines. probably not much...

I did at one time read womens magazines... to try to get their view. If I had only known then what I didn't know and would take so long to figure out.

I'd might have become a monk... luckily, I didn't meet any Harikrishnas in the airport...

adventurous-1 · Answer

As a man It can difficult as some women are just mean, degrading a man if he approaches them, some are only looking for free drinks or food, others are not genuine in that they are more interested in your wallet than you as a person and looking to use you for their benefit. Many like to play head games that are only for their enjoyment and empowerment. There are some women that truly are interested in dating a man but due to the bad reports of men getting abused and labeled for their efforts puts many men put off dating. Women tend to send signals that are misunderstood often and many times completely missed by men, we tend to be straight forward and don't intrepid signals very well. We honestly don't know what women are thinking! I believe that there are some that have an idea but many more who don't care. IMHO

TurtlePoop · Answer

Lose the anon shit, and just ask for help. That's why this site was intended. I told a guy that hot water freezes faster than cold water. He called me a liar. There's nothing wrong with being stupid. Even the president is stupid. But if you want some tips or advice, just ask. "If you ask it, they will come."

Anonymous · Answer

feminist Norah Vincent is the only woman who has ever come close to understanding the difficulties of a man's life and she unfortunately committed suicide

she has yet to go through divorce court, false rape allegations, selective service etc. to truly understand all facets of what men have to deal with on a daily basis

even through dating alone, she proved female privilege was far more prevalent than male privilege in society

actually the experiences of transwomen are far easier than transmen. a lot of transmen (women transitioning into men) are miserably and regretful while transwomen (men transitioning into women) are enjoying life... just ask Dylan Mulvaney

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

They just don't care... now I'm going to read what you wrote.

Read it... I think you know exactly why my opinion is exactly what it is.

Do women undestand how difficult dating is for men or do they just not care?

Don't expect understanding from most women and simps though... It's just not going to happen and welcome to being a real man in the manosphere.

PeachyPie93 · Answer

We do know that it can be difficult but also I have never seen one of my male friends struggling or being single unless he wanted to be.. so I don't know how to take this.. lol

paledreams · Answer

They probably only grasp a small view 🪟 the same way only some men grasp appreciation that "a woman ain't (just) a piece of meat" please don't all whack me at once for the possible inclusion of just lol 😆 meat lol 😆 - I'm respectful, I swear 😅🤣🤣😅😳🫣

Shamalien · Answer

Eh I think dating for men has only really gotten super difficult recently, so older people may not know. Since the advent of dating apps, the dating market as a whole has been destroyed. Women can find sex easily, but not a good relationship. Men can’t find shit unless they are in the top 20% at least.

Nonamez · Answer

It does apply for both sides , guys and girls can be shy , inexperienced, afraid, can find very difficult and challenging to approach someone for a date and some don't and some do care , you never know what personality that's your date 🤔

mobiusforniner · Answer

You can’t control what others think or do You can only control yourself. So stop worrying about what women think and start taking actions that can improve you

Smegskull · Answer

They definitely understand subconsciously but that is instincts and evolution intends for it to be difficult. It is a feature of dating, that these difficulties are there for men, to filter/sort them.

It's a bit like asking "do people understand how hard it is to win a marathon when you have to finish first and there are lots of faster runners?". It's a feature that you have to finish first, etc, etc.

NathanDavis · Answer

I've never had a problem with dating... it's not difficult for everyone

Rachey1986 · Answer

It can be difficult for everyone! Don't let some bad experiences put you off. there's plenty of good people out there.

Unit1 · Answer

They don't care

Anonymous · Answer

A guy has to talk to the girl, determine if there is something there, risk getting rejected and or labeled a creep, plan a date she'll enjoy, pick her up, and pay for it, and pick up all the subtle cues on what she expects.

Yeah, I think women underestimate how hard it is.

LiamJHayden · Answer

I do not find it difficult. Rejection? I just walk away and ask another. Mixed signals? I just walk away and ask another.

rienna888 · Answer

Yeah I guess they get rejected a lot and that really fucks with you. They’re also expected to be the provider, which sucks cuz some women expects men to pay for everything

ProbablyClueless · Answer

If anything they just don't know. Women have dating problems of their own, and those problems are being caused by the men who don't have problems dating.

ManInChains · Answer

They don’t care. But to be honest men shouldn’t be dating anyway. They shouldn’t be having sex either.

chocolatetwopointo · Answer

what makes it harder for men? and how is it easier for women?

Anonymous · Answer

Why the fuck should they care? Do you give a shit about women so unattractive you'd never consider banging them? Nope? Same thing.

Squatting_Slav · Answer

It's quite easy actually, confidence, the ability to walk away and mean it, be funny never text only ever to set up dates/time together

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

It's not difficult. Just look for women on your level and you will easily get a girl.

DrPepper12 · Answer

FOLLOWING!! Great question!! We men need to know if you really see us & our trials!!

Anonymous · Answer

They don't care and they have no idea that somewhere around 50 percent of guys are dateless and sexless.

msc545 · Answer

Women don't care - why should they? Men are easily replaced.

Quoooa · Answer

Women do not give a fuck about male issues. A woman’s mind is designed to be more self interested, it’s just how it is. They don’t care.

grega239 · Answer

Both. Why would they care? Its not their problem

Tomisworthless · Answer

Why would they care? Theyre dating men that date them

noohair · Answer

I don't think women think about that. They just see their problems.

JesseP1nk · Answer

They dont care. But if they have an issue - then everyone must help her.

Apple1996 · Answer

Dating for a lot of men must suck

RedInnocent69 · Answer

I don’t think they care.

Anonymous · Answer

It can be difficult for both genders.

red324 · Answer

They don't care

Slim57 · Answer

They don't give a fuuuuck

Anonymous · Answer

Like what for example?

Do women undestand how difficult dating is for men or do they just not care?

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