My boyfriend has a female friend that I find suspicious. Should I be concerned?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend has a very specific type and she fits it to a tee. He is also very attentive to her (she was calmly standing in line at a food truck and he went to check on her to see if she was okay). He also seems to value this friendship a lot for them to have met four months ago.

When I talked to my friends about it, half told me not to worry about it and others have said that this is his back-up girlfriend (basically in the event that we break up, she will be the next woman that he dates).

Am I overthinking things?

[Finchie40]

Did he meet this girl after you were together or before you were together? If it was after than yes you have every right to feel concerned as to why this girl all of a sudden in the picture. So your boyfriend is being very disrespectful if that is the case. If it’s a girl he knew before I met you , then you don’t really have anything to worry about , she is just a friend , she just. Bottom line couples shouldn’t be making friends with opposite sex people after they get into a relationship, it’s ok to be friendly but not ok if they are investing a lot of their time into that other person. So if your boyfriend is investing a lot of his time into her , he clearly wants to be more than just friends with her , Do not accept that as being ok

[Anonymous]

It could go either way. Especially if she’s cute. If she’s cute most men will w at to fuck her at the last. As for her being a backup, a majority of men don’t have that luxury the way women do. Women put a lot of men in the friend zone but know that if something goes wrong w her current relationship ship she could call anyone of those “friends” up and they’d jump in a heartbeat for her. Unless your man is handsome on, good looking that other women want him too chances are even if he thought that way about her she wouldn’t be his backup. A majority of women find about 80% of men unattractive, so for a female to say most men have a backup chick is just ridiculous.

[Mwolf]

Ask a friend to watch em undercover or you watch yourself from a distance or just trust your boyfriend.

[Nikki1989]

Many men will have a back-up woman. It is to be expected.

[edmwarrior]

99% of men do not have that luxury

[KingslayerC]

You're not overthinking anything. It's suspicious. It's not even a real friendship at four months. Anyone telling you it's normal is either guilty of the same behavior so they're excusing it, or they're oblivious to reality.

[Asker]

So, do you think that my friend’s theory is true about being the back-up girlfriend or is she an actual sidechick?

[KingslayerC]

It depends on the strength of your relationship. If things are rocky, she's a backup, if things are average, she's a side chick. If things are great, then he's just an oblivious moron that doesn't realize he's letting his biology get the best of him.

[Asker]

Things are great/average. I’m just wondering why her and why he feels the need to entertain her?

[KingslayerC]

Because he finds her attractive so he's naturally drawn to her. That's human nature. He's either aware and is shady, or unaware and stupid.

[soe11]

• You don't need worry about it at all.
• It's a normal in society.
• You focused on your love toward him.
• Being sexy for him and get his attention.

[slatyb]

Tell him how you felt. Don't accuse him of anything.

[Alex-Snow]

Have u asked him? How are things sexually with your boyfriend?

[Asker]

He told me that she is just a friend. Our sex life is great.

[Alex-Snow]

Well until he causes u not to trust him I guess it is ok. Does he follow her on his socials?

[Asker]

Yes.

[Alex-Snow]

Will he let u look at his texts etc. with her?

[Asker]

I haven’t asked.

[Anonymous]

specific taste in women? U both look similar?

[Asker]

He is into tall, slender, women with dark features. This “friend” and I both have these features.

[Opinion Owner]

U both are beautiful. So I don’t understand the issue. There’s just exist a women who looks like u

[scott04sa22]

She stealing him from you, it's always a competition

[LiamJHayden]

Because of the specifics, you are not wrong to at least be concerned/wonder.

[MasterKS]

He creating a backup pussy!

[Asker]

So, a side chick?

[MasterKS]

@asker side chick and backup pussy is different, you dont know?

[Asker]

No? What’s the difference?

[MasterKS]

@asker it need a good bunch of explanation to make you understand this, in 30s i expected you know the difference. Are you bit weak to understand men? Dont mind!

[Asker]

… K.

[MasterKS]

@asker meaning?

[Asker]

Are you going to tell me the difference between “back-up pussy” and side chick?

[MasterKS]

@asker surely if you want to know it, although better i share in private than public!

[noohair]

If you don't trust him, find someone you can trust.

[RedInnocent69]

No, you’re not. She is the backup/side chick.

[Asker]

So, do you think he is actively fooling around with her or he’s just keeping her in his orbit just in case.

[RedInnocent69]

Hard to say. Could be fine, as long as he’s not hiding her from you.

[jahaims]

If you don't trust don't date

[Anonymous]

I don't treat a girl that nice unless I like her

[Asker]

That’s what I’m saying, but people are making it seem like I’m paranoid.

[Opinion Owner]

tbh it would be a different story if I have known her for years, but 4 months? naaah

[Asker]

Exactly. Then on top of that he is into tall, slender, prissy, women with dark features and this “friend” is just that.

[Plugs]

How do u and her look exactly

[Asker]

We are both tall, slender, prissy, with dark features.

[Plugs]

How is she better than u.

[Asker]

I never said she was better.

[Plugs]

Then? Problem solved. She just fits into his beauty standards

[msc545]

Make friends with her and you can find out.