Guy I’m dating is going away, what do I do?

[Anonymous]

Need some advice please..

I’ve been dating a guy for around 3 months. It’s going really well, we get on, he’s been consistent and we’ve discussed the future. We’re not ‘official’ yet as we’re both taking it slow but we’re only seeing eachother.

But month he’s going away travelling for 4 wks. By then it will be 4 months seeing eachother. The time difference to where he’s travelling is quite big.

We spoke about it and we’re both aware it’s still very early in but we both really like eachother and said it’s going really well. He wants to continue seeing eachother when he’s back but says he knows it’s a lengthy time so our feelings could change or might not be the same. He says he’s not interested in meeting other girls.

I suggested ending it till he gets back & see where we’re at, he didn’t want to. He said if anything changed we both need to be honest with eachother & he gets he’s leaving at an inbetween time where we’d probably start progressing.

i don’t know what to do. I really like him but im so worried time will change things.

do I hang in and see how it goes, am I wasting my time?

[ArrowheadSW]

Well I've done that before in previous dating relationships. One time I had a week off and I had an opportunity arise where a friend was going to Hawaii and he invited me to go. The lady who I was dating was working and it would not have been realistic for her to suddenly put in for time off, and we had not been dating long enough to go on a trip together anyway. When I got back, she was completely furious with me almost to the point of being violent. Needless to say, we didn't date any longer. (This was a long time ago when I was 26.)

Anyway it sounds like you have a better head on your shoulders. My advice for what it is worth is to not worry about him going. If it ends when he gets back, then the relationship just took its course. If the relationship is still going, then it might be stronger at that point? It is just one of those things. Take it in stride.

[Man-O-Metal]

Not trying to sound mean, but you really need to make up your mind. Either you're serious about him or you're not. 3 months is longer than you're making it sound. If you haven't decided whether or not you want to be exclusive and committed to each other after 3 months of seeing each other, then end it. If you truly feel like this could last a long time, then I have no idea why you'd be worried about feelings changing while he's gone.

[IslaTheWitch]

why are you trying to predict the future? it's impossible...

if you like him and he likes you, you should go for it... you don't have to break up... just endure this time, text or call and be in good spirits...

[WhitneySnow]

Hang in and see how it goes. “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”

[Finchie40]

If you really like him you would wait for him , if not , oh well , it’s not like you are married to him , so it’s up to you what you want to do , just be honest with him if you do end up meeting someone else and hopefully he will do the same for you

[sage2021]

ONLY FOUR WEEKS IS A PIECE OF CAKE!!! That's practically nothing!!

My husband was in the U. S. Navy and would be gone for 6-8 weeks at a time.
When he got home each time we were even closer to each other.

Granted we were married but even before we got married he would be gone for that long.

We stayed in contact through old fashioned mail. We didn't have cellphones back then.

Absence makes the heart ❤️ grow fonder🙂🌷

[RingOfFire]

If the relationship can't survive 4 weeks apart, I don't think there's much hope for it. You have to just let it go and think of it as a break to figure out where you are both at. If it's meant to be it will happen, if it's not it won't. You can't control everything. Some things are a matter of fate.

[SuchSightsToShowYou]

If you end things now, you're going to wonder for the rest of your life what would have happened if you two had stayed together.

Keep in contact as much as possible during the four weeks he's away. If things have changed by the time he gets back, you can end the relationship then.

[Staximus]

One month is not that long. I don't see why everything has to be so absolute and cut and dry, because it doesn't. You don't need to make dumb decisions based upon your negative thoughts. Why can't you just say "see you when you get back" ?

[Stevepro68]

I have never know long distance to work out. It's hard but you have to find a way to be together or move on. Relationship's are far to difficult to navigate when you are face to face. Never mind month's apart.

[MikeTheBartender]

It sounds like neither of you are 100% into this. I would just call it quits, plus it's a good time to call it quits because he's going away so neither of you will have to deal with the possibility of running into the other.

[Abbycado]

You sound insecure. That is not a good sign for your relationship this early. It is just a month and you are asking if you should give up.

All bad signs.

[jazzy34]

Go on with your life while he’s away. If this is a true connection, things won’t change between the two of you. You won’t miss a beat. If they don’t? You’ll know he’s not the one.

[molonski2]

Are you kidding? You can't survive 4 weeks apart?

If not you are seriously wasting your time , make a decision.

[Nikki1989]

Long distance rarely works. You might want to consider moving on.

[Lynx122]

You should keep going. If it's real 4 weeks won't change anything.

[WatchedPot]

To me it will be clear when he gets back if you are meant for each other. As you will never know how much someone means to you until they are gone.

[Unit1]

= taking a break = break up

[DrPepper12]

Go non exclusive til he gets back and reassess then. LDRs don't work

[KrakenAttackin]

"Ending it until he gets back", you really need to be a hoe while your man is away? Pathetic.

[Avicenna]

Your concerns are valid

[elifbrn]

I feel that it will be good. Just wait a little bit.

[Iron_Man]

Talk to him tell him how you feel

[Crazzyyworld]

Let him go whateverrr karma chameleon

[In_Trance]

This is a you problem

[Honestboobman]

Wasting time.. cut it off babe