Am I crazy to allow my boyfriend to cheat on me?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend asked if he could be with another girl I told him I was cool with that. He asked me if it was technically cheating and I told him yes and I told him before the cheating was a deal breaker to me and yet in this entire time that I said yes he said nothing so I don't know why I did wrong.

[Anonymous]

Just sounds like young minded shenanigans. You like him enough to be with him but you don’t love him. There may be things he does that you don’t find attractive or things about him that give you the ick. Who knows. But there’s a level of detachment when you’re allowing him to cheat. It’s also just so silly to me because why be together in the first place.

[Asker]

You're right, but I don't want this relationship to be for nothing, so I want to be able to know how to talk to him to get him to understand that I don't like that but also explain to him why I said yes in the first place

[Opinion Owner]

No relationship is for nothing, these are all learning experiences so that you can learn what you do and don’t want from guys going forward. Right now I don’t think you really know what you want because you don’t really know yourself at your age. That’s why when you’re letting men cheat and not fully invested, you should step back and have a conversation with yourself about what you are really looking for right now. Who knows you may not even be meaning to look for a boyfriend you’re just lonely and want someone to do the cute couple stuff with. Those are superficial reasons, not solid ones to stay with a cheater.

[Asker]

I've got my reasons to stay with him, it's just that regret my choice I just need to know how to move forward and explain that I was wrong

[Opinion Owner]

You said to someone else that you’d feel guilty if you said no, so if that’s anything to do with your reasons then I don’t think that’s healthy. You should stop telling yourself you’re afraid to lose people and instead they should be afraid to lose you.

[LeatherDame]

It’s not wrong, it’s just an open relationship/poly of some variety.


If you’re ok with it then what’s the problem? If you agree to it it’s not cheating

[slatyb]

What do you mean, what you did wrong? It sounds like you have wronged yourself by accepting something you considered unacceptable. Why? Do you imagine he's the only guy who will have you? He's not. End this and meet someone who will care enough to be faithful to you.

[hotman5]

yes its bad its called cukholding and its disgusting stay away from it dump him and be clean and safe ur self for monogamous marriage

[WhitneySnow]

Depends. Why are you allowing him to cheat on you?

[Asker]

I felt like it would be rude to say no when he asked

[WhitneySnow]

It’s not rude! It’s rude of him to even ask (or to do it without asking). You should never let your boyfriend cheat on you unless you want that. Tell him you’ll break up with him if he cheats on you.

[Asker]

He already knows cheating is a deal-breaker

[WhitneySnow]

Then if he cheated on you, you should defo break up with him. Even if you did say yes, it doesn’t count because it was coerced.

[Asker]

Okay

[Nikki1989]

It is not cheating if you allow it. Many couples don't have insecure hang-ups related to having sex.

[Abbycado]

It really isn't cheating if you allow it.

[Asker]

Nevertheless is it bad if I allow it

[Abbycado]

Not if you don’t think it is. Not something I would allow, but to each is own.

[Asker]

I feel guilty that I was messed things up between us if I had said no. And still I mess things up and I said yes

[Benlovegs]

Does it bother you? Does it arouse you?

[Oldschool1981]

No, not at all. My wife has a side guy and I have zero problem with it

[Anonymous]

No. Sharing I'd caring.😆

[jahaims]

You're mental