What does it mean or what to do when you like someone but you haven’t felt your heart beating for them yet?

[Anonymous]

Im seeing someone I like, I really enjoying hanging out with and he treats me well. It’s been about a month or two we’ve starting going on dates and spending time with each other and I’m afraid I don’t have any deep feeling or having that dramatic butterfly in tummy or heart beating feeling. He is someone I do see a future with but I don’t know why I don’t have the sparkle of feeling love from him I guess? What should I do?

[Summeroflove]

Like others have said you don’t force anything just be honest about how you feel to him and so long as you see a possible future keep things going.

Maybe those feelings will spark later, maybe you will have a relationship built on love as well as respect, or maybe at some point it won’t be meant to be and you will both go your separate ways.

In a real relationship it takes open and honest communication. Not in any sort of rude way but you need to be able to sit down with him and discuss your feelings as well as listen to his question, comments, as well as concerns. That’s how real relationships are made.

That way either you can keep building a stronger relationship or on the other hand not waste your time or his if it’s not meant to be.

So you need to tell him how you really like hanging out with him, how well he treats you, how you’re worried since you haven’t developed these certain feelings yet, but how you do see a future with him, etc.

That’s what needs to happen is you telling him exactly how you feel

[Zack-Bann]

If you’re waiting for that young and innocent crush feeling you used to have for your third grade math teacher, you’re in for a long wait


Adult love is far less “sparkly”


That being said if you only see a future with him pragmatically but you don’t feel an irrational desire to be with him: that’s the definition of “settling”


Probably won’t work.

[Anonymous]

I find that butterflies stem more for your anxiety about if the feelings are returned or not. Some would say butterflies are red flags and for the most part I find this to be true. Love is an action and sometimes it takes a little bit of time. You got a check in with yourself and evaluate whether or not you're actually invest or one foot in one foot out.

[Nikki1989]

Don't force anything. Go with the flow.

[cinema75]

I think that being friends is first and foremost. Intimacy grows on top of this friendship. Knowing that you can laugh and have a nice time together can build into a longer lasting love.

[Ms_Facesitter]

It's okay if you're just friends. No need to force it.

[genericname85]

I never even had that. Or do you mean "like them as a friend" but not more?

[Anonymous]

You mean like Atrial fibralation?

[In_Trance]

No...