Are there any good girls out there?

[Anonymous]

My ex called me insecure and controlling for not wanting her to have male friends. She was really manipulative, using these tactics to justify her need for attention from other guys. She needed constant attention and validation. She wanted to feel desired by other men. Everything talks about male insecurity but what about insecure females. I like female attention and feel desired but that stopped when I got into a relationship. I cut out all girls from my life because my ex was insecure and jealous over it. But that’s being a hypocrite. I did that for her, but she wouldn’t do it for me. And i was stupid to commit to her and her disrespect. She told me I need to trust her. But It has nothing to do with trust and everything to do with respect and being serious. She was hurting me with that and instead of understanding it she choose her arsenal of male friends over me. In this modern world people are so fkn stubborn and selfish. I invested so much into her. Gave up everything, people, friends, my time and effort. The level of disrespect I went through is embarrassing. This is being normalized in this modern world. The girl does what she wants completely disrespecting her boyfriend. Most guys won’t stand up for themselves. I think the dating game would change significantly if guys weren’t so weak. I did a mistake and I learned to have standards and setting boundaries. If she doesn’t want to change she can leave because I won’t allow disrespect. But I want to find a girl who shares the same values so that I won’t have to explain things that in my mind are common sense. I want a girl who has good morals, was raised well and that brings me peace.

[Oliverlogan263]

Bro, I feel you on this one. It's totally messed up when someone plays those games and uses manipulation tactics in a relationship. Your ex sounds like she was super selfish and disrespectful, and it's understandable that you're feeling really hurt and jaded after going through that.

You're right, there's definitely a double standard when it comes to guys being "insecure" versus girls needing that constant validation and attention. It's not fair that you had to cut out all your female friends, but she wouldn't do the same. That's some straight-up hypocritical BS.

And you're spot on about how a lot of people nowadays are just so stubborn and selfish in relationships. The whole "do whatever I want, screw my partner's feelings" mentality is way too common. It's good that you're learning to set better boundaries and standards for yourself - you deserve way better than that disrespect.

I definitely think you're on the right track. Finding a girl who shares your values and can be loyal and respectful is key. Don't settle for anything less, man. There are good, moral girls out there who will treat you right. You just gotta keep weeding through the nonsense until you find that real connection.

In the meantime, focus on yourself, surround yourself with good people, and don't be afraid to walk away if a girl isn't meeting your standards. You got this, bro. The right one is out there, I'm sure of it.

[strateguy632]

It is an indictment of western society that they are rare.

[Summeroflove]

Having male friends is fine…. But it depends on what she’s doing with them. Just like having female friends is fine. Now relationship dynamics are different so you can’t force someone to be the kind of person you want her to be.

Some people aren’t compatible so they should move on and stop controlling one another.

Narcissists love to project who they are on other people. She calls you controlling and manipulate she is. She accuses you of cheating she is. She tells you you’re insecure she is…. So what they’re saying it’s probably them.

Yes, there is good people out there. Sometimes it takes time to find them much more finding someone compatible.

[Graptemys79]

I think both men and women feel there are not any good opposite sex people available.

[Anonymous]

Yes sir. They're just in very short supply.

[FunkyMonkee]

I found one and I'm KEEPING HER!!

[Anonymous]

Yes, but they are few and far between.

[ImalwaysrightOK]

Nope.