Can you call yourself an empathetic person yet claim not to feel empathy in a situation?

[Anonymous]

Like it doesn’t seem to make sense

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

It sounds like your specific case was that you and your partner were a bad match, you weren’t able to give them what they wanted despite them continuing to go through the steps they believed they should with you to the point that they felt invalidated and unheard and cut themselves off from you emotionally as that was less painful than continuing to stay connected to you.

[Asker]

No she wasn’t event trying a few months into the relationship. I was fully committed

[Asker]

I constantly wanted to work on our communication and she said it was triggering and never wanted to talk which led to constant arguments where she would call me stupid motherfucker, bitch, nuisance. I have a slower response time due to my disability and she hit me once because of it. She hit me two Weeks into our relationship cause she was losing at a video game

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

I don't think that takes away from me saying you were both a bad match inherently. You missing these early red flags is a lesson you've undoubtedly learned now that it's over.

[petitedollbabee]

Empathy without boundaries is self destruction. You can be an empathetic person who doesn’t feel empathy in specific situations. Just because you’re empathetic doesn’t mean you feel it over every single thing.

[Asker]

I asked based on a relationship I had that went really bad I was on the autism spectrum and the girl was neurotypical and after the breakup she goes I’m don’t have the patience or empathy to be in a relationship with someone on the spectrum.

[Anonymous]

Having empathy doesn't mean you feel empathy in every situation. Just when you can identify and put yourself in the other persons shoes. Having empathy is just the ability to feel empathy for someone.