Need advice on him not reaching out but always responds and picks up my phone calls?

[Anonymous]

I started dating someone 2 months ago and everything had gone really well he did mention to me he is an introvert and about 2 weeks ago he started a new travel job and since then he has really reached out. I know he is stressed but i brought to his attention last week asking if he felt we should still continue to date and if he felt he was too busy and he said no he felt we were fine! So i left it at that however i have mostly reached out and he always picks up my calls and always texts back but i went 3 days and he never reached out except he replied to my Instagram story thats it…i finally reached out yesterday he was like i haven’t heard from you…and i was like same it it always me and i left it at that! I mean i am not sure from a guy perspective would you just wait to see if he reaches out or bring it up or move on?

[ohsheeT]

It's actually because he's a very good guy and he's being honest with himself to a point but he doesn't want to break your heart when it is is he cares for you he loves you and so many different ways but not the way that you want him to the guy would do anything for you he would give you the shirt off of his back he would be there for you in a heartbeat no matter what you needed because that's just who he is and that's how much he cares about you

He cares so much that he doesn't want to hurt you that's how much he cares most guys would know what they have going on and just would use you until you are done

There's something inside of him that tells him that no matter how much he loves you it's just not the right person for him

But he can't say that to you because he doesn't want to hurt you that's what I mean when I say he's a good guy

It is a good guy for not using you I mean he's a really good guy

But that's it right there like I said the bond that he has with you can never be broken because of the amount and the depth of love that he has for you and how much he cares for you

But he just cannot commit to you because he knows down deep you're not the right one but he's afraid to say it cuz he's afraid to hurt you

And who knows maybe tomorrow maybe a month from now maybe a year from now maybe two years from now it will all click in his head and he will say she is the one for me and I blew it and blah blah blah but in this moment in time you're not the right one for him anything can happen though when somebody loves somebody as much as he loves you anything can happen

He will always be your friend until the day you don't want him to be if you get that angry don't do it

Or if he was to find somebody else and he gets with that person and that person tells him that he's not allowed to be your friend or whatever he would make that choice but it wouldn't last long well it would last as long as they lasted which wouldn't be very long a couple years maybe but anyway that's what it is so if you want to remain his friend and in his life don't do anything foolish or stupid be his friends go out with him do whatever don't try to force yourself don't try to force anything just let it happen and who knows if you back off a little bit and don't act like you want a relationship you just want a friendship he might start seeing something in you too and he might say okay time is time it's time for me to make it real

Okay so now since I said all the above just because I said it doesn't mean that I'm right

I can only say what I said because I've been there and I kind of feel that he's doing the same thing he's going through the same thing so you keep being you let him keep being himself and just see where it goes

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, that's a tricky situation. It sounds like this guy really cares about you, but he's also got a lot going on with his new job and maybe just needs a bit more space right now.

From a guy's perspective, I'd say try not to overthink it too much. He's obviously still responding to your calls and texts, so that's a good sign. Sometimes us dudes just need a little more time and distance, especially if we're introverts.

I wouldn't necessarily bring it up again right away. Maybe give him a few more days to reach out on his own. If he still seems distant after that, then yeah, you can politely mention that you've noticed him being a bit more absent lately and ask if everything's alright.

But I wouldn't jump to the conclusion that he's losing interest or wants to end things. Sounds like he's just getting adjusted to his new job and lifestyle. As long as he's still making the effort to talk to you when you reach out, that's a good sign.

My advice would be to just relax, keep doing your own thing, and let him come to you a bit more. If after another week or two he's still being weirdly distant, then yeah, it might be time to have a more serious conversation. But for now, try not to stress about it too much. Guys can be a bit complicated sometimes, ya know?

Just play it cool, girl. I'm sure everything's gonna work out just fine. Let me know if you need any other advice!

[DishLady]

EVEN IF he's distracted with work, a guy who is genuinely interested in you will make an effort to call or text or reach out in some way.

If he hasn't heard from you and was concerned HE should have reached out.

This waiting for you to reach out to him all the time is a red flag.

[Anonymous]

Stop playing these games and move on. It says here you are 30-35, and you are talking about texts and Instagram. FFS!

[ColHathi]

As an introvert myself that has trouble reaching out and staying in contact with people, I agree with Oliverlogan263.

[Anonymous]

You need to leave him and find a man who will treat you like a Queen.

[Asker]

So you think not even try and talk to him?

[Opinion Owner]

Yes, that is exactly what others, and I are directing you to do at this point.