Is this just grief?

[Anonymous]

I met a guy online. He seems nice. We texted and talked a lot. We met up for a few times. It was all good vibes. I went to see him we had drinks made out and had sex. I know it's a irresponsible decision. My mom passed away two weeks ago and my sister passed away 2 months ago. I am having mixed feelings about the sex. It just happened we didn't plan it. One thing led to another. He was worried I would ghost him because I expressed being embarrassed. I had been celibate for a little over a year. Now I feel more attached and attracted to him. But because of the interaction we had it makes me feel insecure. We have a date scheduled for Saturday I'm excited but i just feel nervous around him after our encounter.

[Shiprex]

You were in an emotional state and wanted connection and that's ok. He may have felt he took advantage of you but you need to assure him it was consensual and that there's nothing wrong with it for either of you.

[Asker]

Thanks for the reassuring. I'm just not sure where we go from here. At times I feel like I dnt want a relationship then I feel like I want a meaningful friendship/relationship. However since the intimacy occurred between us I think he had gotten more attached to me.

[Shiprex]

Sounds like you're in a state of flux and going back and forth emotionally which is normal. I hope you don't regret sleeping with him and that the healing from your losses isn't going to interfere with the relationship you seek to get into.
Take it gently until you get confident you know what you want and where you want to go and be open with him about it.

[serious]

Okay so what is the problem here? If he is a good guy, he treats you well with respect and whatever happened between you both is fine.

Do you not want to take things forward?

[Asker]

That's the issue. I'm not sure I'd I want to move forward but after the intimacy I started to feel an attraction. I'm just nervous because of the quick intimacy. I have never been instantly attracted to anyone it always had to build up over time.

[serious]

Okay that is also fine. Just be honest and tell him to not get any ideas and you want to be only his friend and nothing more.

[serious]

Thanks for the MHO

[LiamS95]

If you truly feel comfortable with him, let it go and enjoy. I understand your grief but it's different and yours to work through he might be able to help you but you have to allow thdt to happen.