If guys lovebomb when they are just trying to get in and get out to get laid, how does a man who’s actually trying to get to know me and have a…?

[Itorotirt]

Relationship leading to marriage act?

[Yannae]

When I'm interested in someone for the long term, there won't be any love bombing. Barely any flirting. I'll move at a slow pace.

[Itorotirt]

That’s awesome

[Ironic_Method]

Lovebombing is always a red flag, but there's no way to know how much someone is into you. The best vetting is time. Generally you'll start to see them for who they are through their actions after 3 months of being together.

[MrChinaski]

Just avoid the bomb. It's never well intended. Guys respect women they grow to know.

[Itorotirt]

How can I know a guy is actually getting to know me or trying to? I don’t think I ever met someone who really did. Just a couple guys who pretended to care about who I am.

[MrChinaski]

Your post literally made me cry.

Reality is you never can know and you need to find the right balance between keeping your defences high and letting the right one in. Defences too high and you get nothing, letting the wrong one in and it's worse.

It's just life, for all of us. I think we mainly just try to muddle through.

[bowenw]

Watch for red flags like being too good to be true and pressuring you for sex early on.

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆 if you don't know this at 36 yet you aren't ever likely going to know it.🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️

[olgunadam22]

Men will lie until they get what they want.

[Itorotirt]

Yep. So how do I as a woman prevent being used and dumped?

[olgunadam22]

By not giving him everything he wants right away

[Itorotirt]

Make him wait for everything he wants

[lyrem04]

Discernment

[In_Trance]

Take your time and keep your clothes on