I'm 29 and my girlfriend is 44, is that too much of an age gap?

[Anonymous]

We have good chemistry and really like each other, some think the age difference is bizzare.

[VIVANT]

People will absolutely find something to find bizarre no matter what you do.

if nothing you do is ever considered bizarre by doe line out there, you are probably living an unfulfilled life.

in any case, it doesn’t matter?

of you are happy with her and she is happy with you , if this relationship is giving you what you seek, keep it.

when you have a concrete reason to part ways, you will know. And you will contend with that when and if the time comes.

It will be clear in front of you and you will not need to find out from strangers whether or not you are where you want to be.

Unless… you are doubting others impression of you as a mask of the doubt you feel internally towards the relationship but can’t bring yourself to consider that directly?

I guess I’d search myself a bit to find something that is coming from me a concern that I have, as apposed to looking externally.

Bc if there really is nothing bothering you but what you perceive others perception is, then I’d give yourself a break and just _be in_ your relationship.

i wish you well, whatever you decide

[MemeSupreme]

if you both are at similar or i guess compatible points in your life then age doesn't matter (bc you're basically 30)

[Asker]

We both know what we want and our wants allign, we don't want children and love the idea of traveling.

[Zack-Bann]

I did that when I was 24
A 20 year age gap


She’s still the person I related to the most.
The one I could have real conversations with
And the sex was otherworldly
(She was a little insecure about the idea of me losing interest considering her age which turned her into an absolute freak)


But ultimately it had to end


Because as much as we wanted to shut out the rest of the world and do what we wanted reality came knocking too often


Neither of us could tell our families because they wouldn’t approve
Her friend were beyond happy for her
Mine gave me the high fives as expected
But logistically it was impossible
We were at very different stages in life
She had a lot of experiences in her past that I still haven’t had and wanted to have (not necessarily sexual stuff but life stuff)
So she would encourage me to go out and do what I wanted but felt hollow knowing that I’m involved with someone who can’t be there by side through this stuff

[Asker]

Impossible? I don't think so.

[Zack-Bann]

For me it was
It doesn’t have to be for you

You just need to be willing to sacrifice the young adult life and jump into advanced adulthood to match her tempo

Because even if she tries to meet you halfway there will always be things she feels too old to care about and you’re allowed to care about them but to be with her you will have to chose not to

You can do it just make sure you know what you’re in for

[Asker]

I'm willing to sacrifice the young adult life and jump into advanced adulthood to be with her.

[Miristheiss]

Where are you going with this? Do you want kids? I mean she is already probably looking old. She'll be 50 in a few years, looks fading fast.

You aren't going long term with this are you?

Look term, possible kids and having your own family, having an attractive mate you'd probably be better off with a 25 year old.

[Asker]

I'm looking for long term but I don't want kids, neither does she.

[Miristheiss]

Men age like Sean Connery and women age like... Sean Connery.

This sounds like a total lose situation.
Hey a 6 month fling... sure. Long term? 10 years, 20 years? No way.

[Asker]

I can deal with aging like that.

[OneViewpoint]

The son of friends is in the same situation. He's 26 or 27 and she's 43 I think. They actually seem to do well together. He's immature and she's a stabilizing influence. She doesn't put up with his immature bullshit. She's getting young dick and a decent guy. His parents know. Not a problem for them. I met her. I'm not judging. Didn't seem awkward at all. Good for them.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Since your true question is about the physical aspect, as you pointed out in the comments then... You have to tolerate the idea that you'll always look younger while she will always be "late", in comparison. It can affect you, it can certainly affect her. But I believe that, like any other topic between the two of you, the more you tell and deconstruct what you both feel, the more you'll feel safe, about anything.

[melnc]

If I were in your place and found that this person is stable and could give me more than I expected, I wouldn’t be here asking this question or caring about others’ opinions.

[ibodi]

There are still problems behind it as Macron

[MannMitAntworten]

If you are asking it probably bothers you on some level. What others think or feel about your’ relationship is irrelevant.

[Asker]

I was more asking because of the physical aspect, not the romantic aspect.

[MannMitAntworten]

Then the question is, does the physical aspect bother you if you’re bringing it up?

[Asker]

I was more concerned about her

[MannMitAntworten]

Don’t be. That is for her to decide and my assumption is she has zero problems with the age difference.

[Asker]

That's a fair assumption, I met her best friend and she said "get it, girl" when she found out about the age differnce, my girlfriend responded "Oh, I do alright".

[Anonymous]

It's unusual. But whether it's too much is a moral judgement. It's not right or wrong. It's just unusual.

[slatyb]

Only two people get a vote.

[ilistengood]

Not for sex