What's your opinion?

[Cherrysherrylady]

My friend cheated on his girlfriend with a 19 year old for one year. He was 38 and his tf was 36. His reason was that his girlfriend let herself go and didn't work on herself. She got fat and lazy. The 19yo was hot and sexy.

[HawkPerception]

I don't condone cheating and he's definitely in the wrong here. You should never cheat. Just breakup with them if you're not satisfied to prevent the feelings of betrayal.

That being said, I understand him to an extent. Women (not all) tend to stop putting effort into their appearance and physical fitness after being in a relationship for a while. They think "Oh I have a partner now and he should love me for me, so I don't have to workout and stay fit." But that's not the case at all. Part of a person's personality is the desire to stay fit and take care of their appearance. If you don't, it means not only do you not care about your own personal appearance and physical fitness. It also means you don't give a shit about if your partner finds you physically attractive or not.

The thing is, yes we all get old and eventually lose our looks (as everyone who opposes this view always seems to bring up). And if someone ONLY cared about their partner's physical attraction level, that would make them shallow for sure. But the thing that matters is EFFORT. All a man wants is to see you put in the effort to look good for him. And no it's not a toxic thing to try and look good for someone. It shows you give a shit about what they think.

I would personally leave someone that put no effort into their physical appearance and fitness. I'd communicate beforehand of course. I'd say that I'd appreciate if they come to the gym or go for runs or do some HIIT exercises with me. But if they continually ignore that, I'm going to give them the ultimatum and say I'm genuinely losing attraction to you not just because of your appearance but the effort you're putting in.

[Summeroflove]

This is the sad reality of many relationships and notice cheating is never someone’s fault even if they chose to lay in bed with someone. As for me if I’m so unhappy I just leave a relationship. Be the bigger person…. And many times they just project who they are on the other person typical narcissist.

Just imagine though if he would do something like that to someone he claims to love so much. Imagine just being his friend how fast he would back stab you. I don’t trust cheaters and I feel sorry for his girlfriend. She deserves better.

[naartjie]

Greta answer! But the person cheating is 100% at fault. A bit of communication and working on this is all it needed. It’s weight, it can EASILY be changed. My mom was about 220lbs and in 9 months went to 165lbs. People just like to make excuses for their shitty behaviour. No one wants to work on their relationships these days.

[Summeroflove]

@naartjie a person whose loyal simply leaves. Cheaters just make excuses and 9/10 cheaters project to make themselves feel better as well as look better to others.

[Summeroflove]

@naartjie absolutely it’s all excuses. Instead of apologizing people want to excuse and/or justify it.

[naartjie]

He’s gross, I feel bad for the girl that got cheated on.
You can lose weight easily. He clearly didn’t care about her at all. Weight changes.
I’d love to see what he looks like. I’m sure he forgot that he’s gonna age too.

[Cherrysherrylady]

he's far more attractive than her

[naartjie]

Looks mean nothing, he should’ve left her or he just should never have dated her. I don’t understand why people date others who aren’t really their type, only for them to just cheat and pull that card that they’re not as attractive as the cheater or the mistress. People just like wasting other people’s time and hurting people

[AI Opinion]

As a relationship coach here to bring some insight, I’d say your friend might be missing something vital. If she's really let go, it's a red flag that their relationship could use some TLC. Cheating isn't the answer and can lead to a trainwreck of emotions for everyone involved. Honest communication and working through issues together keeps the love train on track. Let's channel that energy into respect and growth rather than tasteless escapades! 😉 Love bombing might seem fun, but genuine connection is the real prize.

[HelpfulGirlll]

His actions reflect poorly on his character, not her weight.

[Cherrysherrylady]

In what way

[exitseven]

Why woulda hot 19 year old want to have sex with an old 38 year old guy?

[Cherrysherrylady]

Same reason a 19 year old would want to have sex with a 38 year old woman.

Why so surprised?

[exitseven]

It is really not the same but I suppose it is possible.

[Cherrysherrylady]

Why is it not the same?
Its common for young women and girls to be attracted to older men, including much older men same as boys who are attracted to much older women.

[exitseven]

Like I said. It is possible

[Ironic_Method]

Cheating is still a shitty thing to do regardless of the reason. If your partner isn't okay with you fucking others, break up and fuck someone else.

[hello4433]

He couldn't just left his girlfriend and then had sex. His fault!

[hello4433]

Could've*

[Anonymous]

I think it's a chaotic situation for the two of them.

[avery58]

My opinion is that he's a piece of 💩

[TwoToTooTutu2]

Cheating is for losers

[In_Trance]

Alright