Would you continue to date someone who is geographically undesirable - either they live in a bad neighborhood or live 30 minutes away from you?

[sage2021]

[Lliam]

I met my wife through a pre-internet dating organization when I was 40. She was 37.
When you joined, you sat down for a photo shoot. You picked one of the photos to be on your profile.
They had two long book shelves full of ring binders. On the right were the girls in pink binders. On the left, were guys in blue binders. They were arranged in alphabetic order according to first names. Each person had one page. On one side of the page was your 8"x10" photo and on the other side was your profile.

I would flip through and look at the photos. If she was appealing to me, I would read her profile.

If you wanted to meet someone, you filled out a card and it was given to that person. They could look at your page and decide if they wanted to meet you. If they did, the company would give each of you the other's phone number.

When my wife got my invitation, she said she almost rejected me for being "GU". She actually used that term and had to tell me that it meant "geographically undesirable".
She lived in the Fairfax part of L. A. and I lived about an hour away, depending on traffic, in Long Beach.
That didn't bother me because I had an all expenses paid company car and didn't mind driving. Plus, I drove around LA all day for my job.

Anyway, she decided to meet me. And the rest is history.

All my girlfriends in my teens and twenties lived very nearby.

When I was 34, a girl I had known and had physical crush on in my teens called me. I hadn't dated her back then because she was three years younger. She found me by calling my old home number and getting my number from my mom.
She was living in freaking Twenty Nine Palms, over two hours away. But I invited her over and she came. She had 4 kids ranging from 5 to 16 and was near the end of a divorce. They were sharing custody.
She was more stunning than ever.
I drove to her place and she drove to my place. We wound up renting a house together in my town. That solved the GU problem.
It was amazing for a while but turned into a nightmare. We broke up after less than a year.

When I was 36, I met a 30 year old. She lived about a half an hour away.
Shortly after we started dating, I basically started living with her in the house she was renting with two room mates. I just kept some clothes and necessities at her place. I still had my apartment and could easily go there whenever I needed to.
So that solved any GU issues.

But I doubt if I would have continued to date someone if GU issues made it uncomfortable or if it was difficult to see each other often. The issue would have to be resolved somehow.

[Lliam]

Thank you for the MHO. :D 💐🌹🌷

[ilistengood]

When I was in hi school my girlfriend was on the other side of town, I was in west high she went to east. I rode the bus across town and still had to walk like 3 miles, to see her. Uphill, both ways , through heavy snows it was in Alaska, and I was younger and good looking then now add desperation to the mix and id have to say , hell yeah , grins

[ShellyB]

I doubt I would drive 30 minutes often at all and, I would not spend much time in a neighborhood I did not think was safe so, those would be obstacles that he would have to solve somehow which could be as simple as he would travel to me a lot more than I would travel to him. I would not try to be unfair but, I know myself and I know I just would not be driving that much or taking chances with safety if I thought his neighborhood was unsafe, if we couldn’t make it work then that is just what would happen I guess. JMO!

[Genie23]

I dated someone who used to live in my city but moved to US for further education for few years. It was hard. I've also dated someone who was from Australia but was living in my country regarding work.. eventually moved back. From these two experiences I realised it's better to not date or break up sooner than date someone who lives far because it's hard to keep in touch and maintain intimacy.

So, I just avoid dating anyone who lives in other city/state or is going to move/ live far away whether it's just for few months or years.

[Bricealan]

@sage2021 Marie, is 70 miles away - more than a hour - we only had sex once, (if we can call it that) and she is still a fun person to go out with. (Has been for years)

[Surely]

Distance does become a challenge after awhile. Unless you both take turns going to each other’s house.
Since I don’t care for big cities. That would become a problem also.

[exitseven]

30 minutes is nothing. I made tjhe rule of 100 miles.

[FenixG45]

I'm in a LDR. It's NOT ideal, but it works for us rn!

[NathanDavis]

30 minutes is nothing...

[Wise4myage]

No, that wouldn’t work for me.

[LiamJHayden]

Possibly