Why am I judged for not liking Asian women?

[Anonymous]

I'm a lesbian from Southern Africa and I recently moved to New York, I'm quite friendly with a couple of my coworkers at work and we like hanging out together.

During our break together we were discussing our tastes in women and it went to the realm of racial preferences, one of them stated that they personally were not attracted to black women and everyone was respecting of their opinion but when I stated that I wasn't physically attracted to east /south east Asian women that's when people started calling me "kinda racist" and saying I "had no taste" and that Asian women were more attractive than black women and I should try one.

I don't understand this hypocrisy, why's it ok to not like black women but it's suddenly bad when you don't like Asians or Latinas? If racial preferences are not respected equally, then that kind of shows to me that people are actually just racist when it comes to black women to the point of actually trying to convince an African lesbian not to find black women attractive ( black lesbians only like black women) which just shows they're actually racist in this sense.

Why's it wrong if I don't like Asian women's eyes, hair, food, culture, smell etc. They're not physically attractive to me at all and I'm not open to changing that , I don't hate them, they're just ugly to me, the same way black women are ugly to non blacks. No one in Africa has an attraction to Asians unless they are Indian women, also black lesbians don't act like black men so we actually like our own race, we don't like mixing platonically and romantically so we're not the same, people should stop acting like that. Black lesbians only like black women because we're the same species so it's logical

[coralodyssey]

I think it’s racist on either end. A preference is to prefer something over another. Saying I prefer green apples over red apples does not mean i dislike red apples, I simply have a preference. A “preference” is racist once you start to generalize an entire race based off of your own pre conceived notions. You’re free to prefer black women without bringing down Asian women and vice versa, that is a preference. All the things you’ve claimed to dislike about Asian women are things that can be found in any race which is why it’s not longer a preference. All Asian women do not have the same eyes, all Asian women do not have the same hair, all Asian women do not have the same culture, and all Asian women do not smell. If you genuinely believe that, you are racist. If you genuinely believe that every woman in a particular race is unattractive, that is not longer a preference, it is racism. A lot of the statements you’re making are simply not true. So to answer your question, it isn’t okay to dislike black women and it isn’t okay to dislike Asian/hispanic women. You and all your coworkers have some racial prejudice. You should honestly self reflect and think about why you think it’s okay to find a whole race of people ugly.

[Rei13]

It’s okay to have preferences, I’m sorry if those people made you feel like there is anything wrong with yours. I probably wouldn’t go around saying Asian women are ugly but it’s okay to not be attracted to them. We like what we like and I hate when others shame people for that. Personally I've always been more attracted to white men and found other races less attractive on average. I however ended up with someone that is Southeast Asian and wouldn’t have it any other way

[ohsheeT]

Because you allowed people in by telling your story. And it was the wrong people. Stay away from people why creat drama ... if I meet some one and the moment you start talking about somebody negative\n It's time for me to walk away because that's who they are, they live in drama world, they don't have a life. And if they can suck you into it and become just like them, they win life is 10 times better, 10 times easier if you stay away from drama.

[Zack-Bann]

The fact that they spend their coffee break gossiping about their racial preferences in dating is already a sign of low IQ


This is what you talk about when you have nothing of substance to say


It goes without saying your preferences are your own:
There’s no accounting for taste so there’s no way to say with certainty that yours is bad just because they don’t share it

[Asker]

Thank you, I don't know why I'm being demonized for liking what I like

[bunnyboo24]

I dont know, to each and their own. I'm white and i wouldn't care if some guy said he wouldn't date a white woman. We are not entitled to anyone so just ignore them.

I myself would never have kids/date a northern european due too biology. The further apart the healthier and more beautiful the kids are. Research is strong on this and people can get angry at me for that but I dont care. You shouldn't either.

[Zionne]

What you’re experiencing is a mix of cultural bias and social perception. People often react strongly when racial preferences involve groups they see as “minority” or historically fetishized, which can make your personal tastes feel scrutinized more than others’. It’s not inherently “wrong” to have preferences, but because attraction intersects with social history, some people interpret these statements as potentially reinforcing stereotypes, even if that’s not your intention.

[Twalli]

The only reason I like the look of Asian women is because they're generally petite. I've found that, in general, I like petite women regardless of race.

[Asker]

I still don't like them and it's not changing, it also doesn't answer my question

[Twalli]

It's stupid. I don't like the look of modt black and Latina women. That is just preference.

[Asker]

It's not stupid and I don't like the way east / south east Asian women look and that's never changing, I'm never gonna find those things attractive. Why is it ok for you to say that but suddenly not finding Asian women attractive as an African lesbian is stupid? They're ugly to me

[Twalli]

It's stupid to disagree with or disrespect someone else's personal choice.

[Asker]

Thank you for understanding and I apologize for misunderstanding your previous comment, this whole situation is irritating so I thought you were on the same page as them, that's my bad

[Twalli]

Same page as you, actually.

[AgentG111]

Life's short live it up! You need to look in the mirror and tell yourself they don't matter! What matters is you and what you want or desire!