Are women a lot more attracted to men with money/great jobs?

[tstarr17]

Before you answer "yes, what a stupid question", hear me out, and you'll see exactly why I ask this. I'm 33 years old (at the time of me writing this). I currently own a condo I bought 8 years ago, I currently make about $50k a year working a grocery store retail job. For my living situation and my 3.5% interest rate, that's not too bad. I am taking a course to become an insurance agent and make better money, along with having a career that is not entirely at risk due to automation and AI. I do not have any kids; on the contrary, I haven't had many girlfriends during my life. My longest relationship ever lasted about 2 months. I rarely date; the last date I went on where we both agreed it was a date was July of last year. I've used dating apps a ton in my life, along with mucking up the courage to ask some people out IRL, but that didn't work either. (I consider myself an introvert.) I feel like I'm at least a decent human being. I own my own place, I have no criminal record, I have friends, I'm close with family, my job isn't the best, but it does pay the bills, a lot of people think I'm very nice and responsible, I'm not an alcoholic, my sister thinks I'm a fantastic uncle to her 2 kids. And yet, dating and relationships seem to be my kryptonite, and it makes me feel like I'm a much worse person than I really am. Long story short with this: I was interested in this one lady earlier this year, my friend's girlfriend's sister who moved from another state and lives closeby now. She wasn't interested in me, and my friend told me she wasn't really looking for someone and had bad previous experiences. Yesterday, I found out she has a boyfriend now. She was single at the time, but not now. (more detail in comment below)

Updates

9 mo

I have a few friends who make more money than I do, and their wives all respect me and am glad I'm in their lives, but hypothetically, if they were single and never met my friends, but me instead, I'm not convinced they would date me, even though I'm very similar in a lot of ways to the men they would end up marrying. My friends don't know I feel this way. I have another friend, the one I mentioned earlier who's girlfriend's sister I had interest in. (More next comment)

Updates

9 mo

He does have a degree in business management, but he felt overworked and underpaid there, so now he just does some server job. He's been with his girlfriend since 2018 I believe, but they had a kid in 2019. Before they knew of the pregnancy, they were talking about breaking up. But it seems like they worked things out since they knew there was a baby on the way. (more in next comment, almost done)

[Anonymous]

It’s not because you aren’t rich. A majority of people aren’t rich and most men still have girlfriends/wives. I can’t say what’s really the problem because I don’t know you, but typically it’s one or multiple of the following reasons:

* No sex appeal. Having no masculine energy.

* Insecure/timid/shy.

* Passive. Don’t approach/write first to women, persue women, make plans, taking little to no initiative.

* Stubborn, know it all, won’t compromise on anything. Have firm beliefs and unwilling to be open minded, meet half way, listen to others and accept you’re not always right.

* Mysogynistic views that show through.

* Using stupid games and manipulative techniques that some sort of red pill dating coach man says is good but in reality isn’t.

* Cheap.

* Rude or judgmental.

* Not caring about their own appearance and/or hygiene. For example ill fitting non stylish clothes/glasses/shoes, mad scientist-like hair especially bad if also balding, non groomed beard, dirty clothes, smelling bad, not brushing teeth as often as they should, greasy hair etc.

* No humor, uptight, taking everything too seriously.

[tstarr17]

It's not because I'm not rich, it's because I probably am considered a lower income earner compared to other people. I'm sure I'd have more luck if I was making 100k or something, since that would provide more financial stability. I'm sure women, at the very least, strongly prefer that. That one woman I dated and am friends with has also said she believes I have more potential than some other guys she knows. I don't think any of those other things you mentioned really apply to me. I have had insecure problems in the past, but that's what dating apps do to you these days when you can't find anyone on there and people play games. (I don't use those anymore since they're basically just window shopping and hookups these days). I'm really not sure what else would be so bad about me.

[Summeroflove]

In fact. Plenty of women have dated men of lower status just for the reasons you mentioned.

Men would be surprised what women will do for men they’re genuinely into. Verses using for money status etc.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely. Guys date for sex generally but women date to find a husband. He needs to be able to take care of her. 50k isn't much.

[tstarr17]

I don't fully agree with that first part, at least from my perspectie since I find hookup sex to be souless and lacking passionation. I definitely want a wife

[jamesgoldman]

Naturally yes but it scales so I've been making £500 a month for the last 12-13 years

At the beginning of that in school carrying £300 and wearing a few light, tasteful pieces of jewellery made me attractive to the point of turning down potential partners

Now I make the same money, have thousands at my disposal and prefer my jewellery inelegantly bulky and quit dating altogether 9 years ago

[Anonymous]

Yes.

https://www.stuff.co.nz/world-news/350577479/women-are-more-attracted-to-rich-men-scientists

[Summeroflove]

Let me be brutally honest if a woman’s dating you because of your money and/or your job. The relationship will probably not last especially if she feels no real attraction for you. Let me tell you that some people aren’t going to be attracted to you…. That’s it. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person or that they hate you as a human being.

The issue is that you haven’t found the right one. If a woman all the sudden wants you because she’s impressed with your job or money. She’s just using you… I’m not saying having a good job or money is a bad thing. But don’t flaunt it with the intent of getting women.

Finding someone takes time. Relax. Many men who get loads of female attention (same for women who get tons of male attention) end up getting into some pretty bad relationships.

Do things that you’re interested in. This can help you find more like minded women.

[Nikki1989]

Ugh, that timeless old myth is back for another round.

This is usually something men with zero personalities say to make themselves feel better about their failures at relationships.

[tstarr17]

Nobody's ever said I had no personality. I think it's possible because they probably don't view 50k a year as making much. Money and financial stability is important in today's world. I do it too; I wouldn't date some part timer working at 7/11 living with her parents if that's all she was doing. If it's not this, then I'm not sure what's so unattractive about me. I dated that one woman for 2 months, and while it didn't last long, she and I are still friends today. We dated over 4 years ago and she thinks I have a good personality. Looking back at it, I now agree we're better off as friends, since she doesn't want kids, but I'm open to it, and she gets offended by stuff easier than I do, even when you're really not trying to be mean or rude about it. She dated other guys since then and doesn't talk to them now since she felt they had shit personalities.

[BonzoInBitburg]

Money makes it easier to get the first date. After that its all you.