Back with an ex is this good idea?

[RBBKLB]

I split with my ex of 5 years 2 years ago he was quite controlling narcissist and angry. This year he saw me with a bloke and he then started messaging me begging me to speak to him saying he had changed etc. So I did. We've been seeing each other since May but his family don't know neither does his friends we've been on holiday but he lies to everyone about who he went with. He said we r taking it slow. He calls me every day for hours. He calls other girls babe he doesn't call me that. When I asked him why he does he said its habit and does it to every woman but it makes me feel invalidated and not good enough. Am I wasting my time with him again? Something pulls me back to him but he won't ever be able to offer me anything but why can't I say no is it because of his narcissist behaviour?

[HollyK21]

After having previously been together for several years, the only reason I could think that he’d want to hide you is because he’s afraid his family/friends would judge. I don't know how your relationship was previously or if it’s a situation they wouldn’t want him in again, but that’s what it gives. Otherwise what’s the point keeping you a secret? You can still take things slow without hiding the fact that you’re trying again. So whether or not this was a good idea is looking like it wasn’t.

[Screenwriter]

This has to do with something lacking in yourself that you return to someone who is controlling and talks to other women in affectionate ways he doesn't do with you. Get away from this man and get to a professional counselor who will support you in getting away from a man who is back with you but NO ONE KNOWS HE IS!

This is so unhealthy. Put yourself and your care of yourself first. Get help and stay away from this guy. It s clear he hasn't changed. Good luck.

[RHK36]

You're a walking red flag because you like men like this. Either move on because you have self respect or stay quiet and accept your fate of being mistreated. You're too old to be playing games or being that delusional.

[FunkyMonkee]

It's like taking a bottle of milk out of the fridge, smelling it, finding out it's gone sour and saying, "I better put this back in the fridge, it'll be better tomorrow."

[Staximus]

This girl is about as smart as a sack of potatoes

[HollyK21]

That’s a great example👏

[FunkyMonkee]

If you know how to trigger those bad traits in him, try doing that and see if he really did change. If he did, he won't react the same way he used to and you should hope it's for the better, not the worse!

[beenherebefore]

I didn’t see a single green flag in what you wrote.

[Staximus]

He lies to everyone including you, you're an idiot and asking for the same old bullshit again

[Staximus]

He lies to everyone about who he's with because he probably has another girlfriend

[bowenw]

If he's not making you feel special it's probably best to move on.

[dudeinohio]

He can't change his personality. That is hard coded in his brain.

Eventually, all his bad characteristics will come out.

[Anonymous]

Trauma bond.