Girls in you 20’s, would you date a guy your age who had been divorced, no kids, no connection to her anymore?

[Anonymous]

I (27) was married for a single year before my ex cheated on me. I don’t tolerate infidelity and I left. No kids, no ties whatsoever to her. I want love again but worried women in my dating age range will likely view divorce as a huge issue so young.



As stated. Ex cheated with a guy way older than us. I’m genuinely over it now.

But I just worry about how that will sound to a woman who is 23-29. Really not into dating older than me. I’m very serious in what I want and I don’t want this divorce to make me seem like I don’t take commitment seriously

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

I know I am older so you may not want my opinion, but sure, I would date someone who has been married before even if he does have kids. I know it would be harder with kids because they might think I am trying to replace their mom, but I think we could work through that.

As for him, unless he was still attached emotionally to his ex still (whether that be love or hate), then he should understand what it takes to make a relationship work the second time around.

[Asker]

Would you have felt that way at 24 though?

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Sure though at that age I wasn't married yet. It would have been a first for me. The kids thing would have been maybe a little easier if they are too young to know what's going on yet.

Same rules apply though if he was still attached to his ex by love or anger though. I would need him to focus on me and not her.

[Asker]

No o mean like in my case with no kids but past marriage

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Yeah that would be fine. Only hangup would be if he still has some sort of feelings about her whether good or bad. Id basically want him to forget about her and focus on me instead

[Abbycado]

That is a bit out of my comfort for age range, but if I were older and done with school, yes I would consider it at least.

[Asker]

If you were like 24/25?

[Abbycado]

Yes, that is what I was thinking. If I were 23 or older, as you mention, that would be okay then. Previous marriage would not be an issue anymore than someone with a previous relationship.

[Abbycado]

Ty for mho!

[Asker]

Yeah unfortunately 18/19 said they wouldn’t so I think I’ll just be ending it

[Abbycado]

Sorry, I am confused. Who is 18/19 and end what?

[LazerBean]

Not personally, but I know plenty of people who would not have a problem with that.

[Asker]

Really? Even though she cheated on him and no ties whatsoever? Can I ask why? Kinda sucks the guy who already got betrayed gets a black mark against him

How old are the women who would? (23-28 is my dating range)

[LazerBean]

I mean, adult women of all ages these days are less and less picky.

[LazerBean]

But I personally wouldn't because I don't have much baggage in my life and I want to be with someone who is the same.

[Asker]

Why do you assume this would carry baggage? No children or joint anything. It’s a LTR ending essentially

[LazerBean]

Divorce always equals baggage. And equating a marriage to a long term relationship outside of marriage is an absolute red flag that indicates childhood baggage as well.

[Asker]

It shouldn’t be, the other party cheated. It’s no reflection of my failure or baggage and I genuinely hold nothing from it. It was a 5 minute phone call with a judge no lawyers even.

I think you really have an intense view of divorce that isn’t reality

[LazerBean]

You're free to have that opinion

[4ngelic]

I'm in my mid twenties, and wouldn't have a problem with that in those circumstances

[Chocolatetwopoint3]

nope

[Asker]

You wouldn’t even when you were mid 20’s

[Chocolatetwopoint3]

nope

[Asker]

Why not

[Chocolatetwopoint3]

just wouldn't

[Anonymous]

No I would not.

[Asker]

Can I ask why? No judgement just curious

[Opinion Owner]

Because when I get married I want that to be my husbands first time doing it too. I don’t want to get married to someone who’s already ”been there done that”. I don’t want to be someones second wife. I don’t want to spend my life with someone who already promised forever to someone else. I don’t want to spend my life with someone who loved another woman like that. And depending on why they divorced I wouldn’t trust that he’d be a good partner or that he wouldn’t ever leave me. He’s already proven he’s capable of that. In case she left or like you say, she cheated, I wouldn’t want to be married to a man who’d still be with his first wife if only she hadn’t cheated. For all these reasons combined I wouldn’t date a man who’s been married (or even engaged) before. For similar reasons I wouldn’t date a man who has kids either.

[Asker]

Hmm.. the comment of ‘he’d still be with her if she didn’t cheat’ really doesn’t stand up to reason.

You could say that about anyone in a relationship. “They would have gotten married if she didn’t cheat etc.

So divorced people who were genuinely betrayed should do what in your eyes?

[Opinion Owner]

Yes it does. You would still be with her if she didn’t cheat on you, and yes the same is true when someone cheated in regular relationships. In a perfect world I would prefer a man who’s never been in a relationship before but nowadays that’s unrealistic so I draw the line at having been engaged/married. They’ve taken the ultimate step in their relationship before and because of that and all the other reasons I mentioned I would not date a man who has a past like this. I would not be someones second wife, period. What divorced people should do? Date someone who don’t care. There are obviously people who don’t share my fwelings about the matter and WOULD date a divorced man. Accepting that not everyone would is just something you have to do though.