How do I tell my family I’m not interested in this guy romantically?

[Anonymous]

I (27 F) have been single for two years now. I ended my last relationship because my ex was cheating on me with several people behind my back. I took the time after to heal, work on myself, and spend time with family and friends, get my sanity back. Now I’m 27 and my father is trying to set me up with this guy he knows from work. The guy is 21. He is younger than me, but he’s also very mature and family oriented like I am. He’s introverted as well like me. I do find the guy attractive but I didn’t get a spark when I met him. I got a friend vibe and I am not trying to be mean at all but I feel like my parents are pressuring me to date him. I’ve known the guy since October but I just don’t wanna rush it. How do I let him off easily and just be friends and tell my family without it sounding rude?

[Summeroflove]

Be blunt. You’re not only doing yourself a favor. But also this dude. Just because you’re not into him doesn’t mean someone else isn’t. And wasting his life pretending you wanna be with him is very wrong.

You’re not being mean…. Wasting his time would be mean. Sure…. At the end of the day. You could try a date to see if anything materializes. But if nothing does after a few don’t waste his or your own time.

Your father isn’t the boss of who you date. He may be well meaning.

Tell him. Tell him directly that you do like him as a frjrnd. But that you just don’t feel that attracted. That you have respect for him and know there is someone out there for him and don’t want to waste his time.

That’s it. …. It’s not mean and it’s not a lie. That’s how you feel. Being mean would be making fun of him and hating him as a human being. You’re not being mean.

[Zack-Bann]

You can say it the same way you just wrote it here “good guy, no spark”


But ideally you should talk with him about it.


Because if you and him decide not to pursue anything your parents will have no say either way.


Gotta say I never heard of a parent choosing s guy 6 years younger to introduce to their daughter.
Surely your dad must know that at 21 he’s still far from being mature no matter how much he’s smart and well spoken.

[Asker]

I guess it can vary, i dated a guy my age back in summer of 2025 and that didn’t work either but yeah :/

[Zack-Bann]

You make it sound like you’re 100

As someone of similar age to you I say this for the both of us: we’re still too young to act old ;)

[Asker]

I just have terrible luck with love in general lmaoo so I just love myself and my fur baby lol. I’ll be 28 this year but people still think I’m 23 haha

[Zack-Bann]

Well I’ve been 28 for a couple of months and I haven’t been that lucky with love

I did try many times but here we are

Although I don’t look 23
So when we go out everyone will think I’m way older sorry…

[Asker]

I don’t think you look over 25, but I just have a baby face and am short hence is why people think I’m younger.

[Zack-Bann]

Haha thanks.
And look, even if you do look young your parents must understand that you’re an adult anyway
So like I said you shouldn’t force yourself to date a guy you’re not into

You’ll find someone just gotta keep being social
It’s all we can do

[DishLady]

Just get involved in a new project that takes up a lot of time. Then you can legit say you're busy.

[Asker]

That’s perfect!

[DishLady]

😉 .

[bowenw]

Date other guys and tell him about them so he gets the message you are not interested in him as more than a friend.

[Asker]

I’m just not interested in anyone right now in general nor am I looking

[bowenw]

You could say something to him like it is nice to have him as a friend.

[Staximus]

You're not rushing anything, you just met him one time. Life is not some stupid romance movie. Welcome to real life. You don't always get an "instant spark", and to dismiss somebody just because you don't want to bang them right when you meet them doesn't mean they're not the right person. Once you get to know them you can make that determination.

[slatyb]

You just tell them and if they continue talking about it, change the subject. You are an adult. live your own life.

[zagor]

Let your family know (since he doesn't seem wildly into you) that you're just not interested in anyone right now.

[jahaims]

Super weird to involve your family in your romantic life

[Asker]

I wasn’t trying to at all, but my dad met this guy from work and thinks he’s a good fit for me.

[Anonymous]

You probably can't. You don't always know what's best for you. And you're probably making a mistake her. But that mistake is still YOURS to make. Tell your parents that.👍

[Anonymous]

Tell the guy you aren't interested.