I’m not exactly sure what to do anymore, will I remain alone for the rest of my life?

[Anonymous]

Hi, I’m 23 turning 24 this year. I’ve never had a boyfriend, never been approached, never been on a date.
Everyone says dating is easy for women, but it seems like I’m one that’s left out of that. I sucks watching others get asked out and going on dates, yet I just sit here. It’s always the same for me, no matter what I do nothing changes.

Surely as time passes these things will eat away at me and I won’t make it to 35. I’m not exactly sure what to do. I work out, I have a job, I go to events in my city, I interact with others, I’ve asked guys out before but it ended with them making fun of me with there friends.

I don’t really want to turn this into a whole depressing rant sort of thing, but I’m thinking about giving up.

[Nikki1989]

99% of the time it is your choice. People (men especially) are quick to put the blame on other people or outside forces. Even worse are those who go out of their way to convince others that they are happy being single. The fact they have to go to all that trouble tells the real story.

[Asker]

I’ve approached guys myself and they just laugh and make fun of me. I’ve been told that I’m pretty and look young (which I am young) by women and the women around me are very harsh when it comes to looks. So at least I know they aren’t lying.
Today a guy that knocked on my for some pge scam thing asking if I’m the bill payer, which I’m not. He then asked if my spouse was home. I’m constantly told by others that I look like I’m still in high school, so a dude asking where my spouse is made zero sense

[Asker]

Now if I knew what was wrong with me I’d take the blame, but when all the guys do is laugh and talk shit about me I can’t figure out what is wrong.

[Berethor]

Not a Christmas cake yet, and virginity is a good thing, you can follow me if you want to chat.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Christmas+Cake

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/Virgin_Power

[Anonymous]

Let me ask, what men have you approached? These men you’ve approached, would you say they’re in your league?
What do you look like if I may ask?

[Anonymous]

What's wrong with being single at 35? I'm over 35 and I'm single. It's not a fatal condition.

Have you asked every guy out? No. Well then there's still hope. If they're not coming to you them you got to go to them (more) 23 and 24 is still pretty young. I remember thinking it was all over for me at 25. Little did I know I'd be twice that age and single. Again, not the end of the world. It's always better to be alone for the right reasons than in a relationship for the wrong ones.

[Asker]

There’s not anything wrong with others being single at 35, I just don’t want that to be me. Plus I’m actually very tired of being made fun of by friends and family for not having a relationship.
I’d like to experience at least one relationship, and quite honestly I’d rather not be the laughing stock of my family and friends for the rest of my life.
I assume you’ve been in some sort of relationship and have most likely had sex, I’ve had neither so

[Opinion Owner]

Yes I've dated. No I haven't had a "relationship". If your family and friends put you down for being single they're not good family or friends. Why would you care what someone's opinion of you I'd if they're just tearing you down? Now, if they've tried to help you, that's another matter.

[Asker]

So you have dated, you got the experience. I haven’t had any of that experience at all. So why should I be happy single?
I care because they provide the roof over my head and the food that I eat.
They did attempt to help me for years, it just isn’t working. My brother who is 2 years older than me has a long term girlfriend, while my sister the same age as me is now married.
It sucks, and honestly I don’t want a live a long life like this.

[Opinion Owner]

First off my dating experiences are very limited. Secondly I don't buy your story. My question about your family and MAYBE friends was an attempt to get you to fess up. If they house you and feed you they care about you. And it sounds like they hit you some truths that you don't want to listen to. My guess I there have been guys that had some interest in you. But those guys were not good enough for you. I'm not saying you have to take any guy. I'm simply saying that there are guys out there. It sounds to me like you're just not ready to date yet. Wanting a fantasy and wanting a relationship are two different things.

[Asker]

There haven’t been any guys interested in me. I was the girl that was bullied for being black in a predominantly white school, I was mocked, called the n word, made fun of for having a gap, called different things throughout middle school and high school. It got to the point that my parents switched me to home schooling.
I didn’t have any male friends, I barely had any female friends due to the bullying.
Here’s you fess up that you wanted, I don’t enjoy talking about what happened to me while I was in school at all. It was horrible, and I’ve moved past it.
Unless I was supposed to date a guy that was calling me an er and a gap toothed loser then what else was I supposed to do?

[Asker]

If I’m not ready to date so be it, I don’t really plan to be here much longer anyways. This whole thing with dating has been eating away at me for the last year and I’m tired of it, I’m tired of feeling like I’ll never be wanted be anyone.

[Opinion Owner]

Well that's the first thing you need to do is get over this feeling of not being good enough. There is someone out there for you. Love is hard, feelings are hard, and relationships are hard. And being young is hard. But meeting someone is not going to fix this problem. God made you. And God doesn't make mistakes. You's just as you're supposed to be, perfectly imperfect. Work on your self esteem. Most people get bullied in school. You wouldn't believe how common you story is. I'm not minimizing your pain. I'm simply saying don't let your past destroy your present or future.

[Asker]

Yeah, as much as I’d like to believe god doesn’t make mistakes I can’t. I feel like god sees me struggle and he cracks a smile every time I’m on edge. God gave me the desire to want to love and be loved, but what love am I supposed to give when no one wants it? I wish god would take away my ability to love and the want to be loved.
I’ve worked on myself for years. These feelings have over the last few months have risen. I don’t want to live this anymore, god only gives these things to those he truly loves. I’m not one of them, he’s shown me that over the years.
I’ve always been kind to those who had bullied me, even now when I see them I’m kind. I’m tired of being kind to everyone, it gets be absolutely no where. I mean 23 and still being talked about, years later? It’s embarrassing, and at this point I might as well become like the girls who sleep around. At least I’d be wanted, unlike now where I don’t sleep around and feel like I’m worthless.

[Mike_Hum]

You’re still a baby at 24. Are you fat?

[Asker]

Why would I be fat?

[Mike_Hum]

Guys don’t want fat chicks. Are you autistic

[Asker]

I’m not fat so… I’m not autistic either. I was thinking your were a nice dude, but now your asking if I’m autistic because I asked a question?
Also the amount of dudes I have seen dating/married to a woman who is “fat” doesn’t prove your point t on guys don’t want fat women. You just don’t want one. Do you expect a fat guy to still be wanted? If yes then, you can’t attempt to tell women they aren’t wanted because of their weight.

[Mike_Hum]

No, I'm trying to figure out why guys aren't going for you. Are you overly shy?

[Zionne]

gurl you're still young, don't pressure yourself

[tfan1]

Don’t give up 👍🙂