How to not care that nobody likes you?

[Anonymous]

I have never truly been liked by someone. Nobody ever invited me to date. I easily get attached if someone show me a little bit of attention and get upset if they don’t like me back.
Also I’m really insecure. If in the past I would think that it’s because I’m not pretty enough, now I also care about my age. Like I’m not just pretty enough maybe I’m also old.
How to not care at all, that nobody likes you and not be desperate about finding boyfriend and just live life and not care.
My life is full of rejection and every time it hurts me.

[BadApple69]

There is actually so much to this that it’s hard to say all that is really important…. Met me try!
First off you are unique, one of a kind. Maybe you aren’t as pretty as the girl next door, but then again she isn’t as pretty as another girl and so on. There is always someone more attractive…. That’s not what’s really important anyway. Looks fade. Personally I’ll take a girl who is honest and faithful over a pretty girl any day.
When you get out of bed in the morning know that there is no one like you! Be confident in yourself and know that you have a lot to offer the world. Maybe your talent is communications or maybe you can be super loyal and faithful…. This is very attractive to men.
Always be confident in everything you do. Confidence will attract people.
I have known many people like you and lack of confidence keeps you home and alone.
Now as for me…. I don’t care what people think of me good or bad. I go out everyday and do the best I can at anything I’m doing. This goes for everything. If I’m standing on the subway, I am standing tall and proud. At work I give 110%. It’s an army slogan “be all that you can be”. I believe in that.
You stand tall and radiate confidence and people will come to you. Any questions please just ask. I’ll help you if I can.

[Adam_INTJ]

I talked myself into apathy about dating for a bit using the following method: ask why I care about dating (or the supporting reason) until I arrive at a deeply held value, at which point I can find no more supporting reasons (e. g. Justice is a hard core value to look for deeper support for. Then find other ways to fulfill that value.

For me, it came to a couple core values of looking for security and self-worth. I then ventured to find alternative ways to meet a desire for security and self-worth.

HOWEVER
I don't recommend trying not to care. Even if you try not to care, what does that get you? In 40 years you'll be old and alone. To force yourself not to care is to eat the junk food and pretend that diabetes isn't a possibility. It just indulges in comfort now while multiplying future suffering.

Could your lack of prospects be from your physical figure? Using an app like macrofactor plus weightlifting for an amazing way to dial that in and get guys looking your way.

Could it be your lack of a social life? Join a church, political group or interest group on Facebook groups or meetup. com. Job + doomscrolling isn't enough to find someone. You need a social life.

Have you tried dating apps? Sure, it's not a hallmark movie, but neither is real life. A blah way of meeting beats being alone at age 65.

Don't spare any effort to arrive at the happy place of making a family of your own with someone you love.

[MontBlanc]

I don’t think the goal is to “not care” at all.

It’s normal to want to be liked , we’re human.

I just think there’s a difference between wanting connection and needing validation from everyone.

The more comfortable you are with who you are, the less rejection feels personal.

Not everyone is meant to resonate with you and that’s okay. The right people don’t require you to shrink or perform.

[Unycorn]

I understand you.

I am sure that you catch attention by the wrong people because how you feel.

Try to believe that you are a good person. Maybe doing good things as donate or help for free may help you to see yourself in a better way. When you are proud of yourself and you know you are a good person thenyoue aura will be shining and catch the persons you deserve to be with.

[Anonymous]

This is easy to answer.

Because the reality of life is most people do not like anyone, only what they can get from that person. All the "valuable" people out there. The people you assign worth to. The people that surround them are using those people to whatever end.

Now I'm sure everything I've posted so far sounds bleak and depressing, but it's not. I just want you to understand you have as much value as anyone else. Most people are self involved. They're not evil. They not even selfish per se. They're just human. And when you meet another human that values you without wanting anything from you, first be suspicious😆, but then value that person. Because people who are genuinely that way are rare.

[Berethor]

Well you can get cats, but it make sense to care. You can follow me if you want to chat.

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/Crazy_Cat_Lady

[slatyb]

Have you considered counseling? I had a pretty low opinion of myself, finally got some help when I was some years older than you are and it changed my life.

[MrChinaski]

Not to dismiss the important emotional content of your post, thank you for sharing, merely to offer a simple practical suggestion: Next time don't post anon. You might make a friend.

[Nikki1989]

Usually, "nobody likes me" is a cognitive distortion (a trick your brain plays on you). It’s rarely true.

[Adam_INTJ]

True. It's often that the reality is "no one who likes me is someone who I like back"

[AngryCarl3]

Donald Trump? Is that you?

I highly doubt that nobody likes you. I like a lot of people but I wouldn't tell them so unless I was very, very drunk.

[Siggie2]

It is normal wanting someone to like you. We are people and we need each other. To not care at all is unhealthy and will not help you

[Anonymous]

From the other side of the spectrum it feels like nobody likes you because everyone wants to use or exploit you. People are sh... and when you can't make yourself happy, no one will do.

[FunkyMonkee]

Just go about doing what you wanna do and don't worry about anybody else.

[dudeinohio]

Sorry... you are not old. Still in your 20s. You have a lot of life to life. Be patient... you'll find someone.

[Anonymous]

Sometimes I feel like that, but you have move past it. You'll find someone eventually.

[Anonymous]

I've gotten used to it 🫠😅😁 folks
Don't all upvote me at once