Are some people just meant to be single and never find real love?

[Anonymous]

Do you think they are? I don't ever think I'll find the right guy it's always me being disappointed - it seems I'm happier single...

[DishLady]

Some people are simply not equipped or prepared to love others. They are too stuck on themselves and their lives. It doesn't matter HOW MUCH others try to love them. If they are not ready, they're just not ready. Ir's important to register that.

Other people have "risked" being in relationships and had very bad experiences -- OR have struggled with extensive loss -- so they've turned in the proverbial towel and are not interested in trying again.

[Anonymous]

No, it really depends on a lot of factors.

Many people are married because they have lower standards. If you keep high standards, you will stay single for longer.

If you really want a husband and are willing to lower your standards, move to a marriage minded population area with somewhat of a decent population. You should be able to get married with no problem there.

But if you were to live in huge cities, it's much harder to find commitment there due to sheer volume of choices.

[Asker]

No I'm not lowering my standards for a man

No I don't want marriage

[Asker]

If men want quality women they should work on themselves to attract that

[Opinion Owner]

then you can deal with not needing a relationship then.
because truth is... if you wanted it badly enough, you will lower your standards.

[Asker]

Why should I lower or shrink myself for a man - I don't think so

[Opinion Owner]

Because if your standards are too high, you won't have much of a pool to pick from

[Asker]

Why should I lower myself for these average mediocre guys - I worked too hard to settle - these men should evolve and match women

[Asker]

I don't deal with average males who can't benefit me /I'm better off single

[Asker]

My standards aren't high enough I won't deal with a man not even in my financial bracket

[Opinion Owner]

Men in high financial brackets have many options. They don't have to go for you. Women prioritize wealth while men prioritize youth

[Opinion Owner]

Not saying a rich man won't ever want you. But gotta consider what men want too, not just obsess over what you want. Consider what you bring to the table compared to him.

[Asker]

I'm not obligated to do with an average man and idc about a rich man either hence my selection in staying single and keeping my finances to myself what I have been doing

[Asker]

Men aren't the prize women are and IDC what a man brings to the table ( if no man can't benefit my life I'm not obligated to date or deal with him )

[Asker]

I also don't care what men want

[Asker]

Average men should date women in their financial bracket - women like me end up staying alone

[Asker]

I stopped dealing with men 16 years ago with no plans of dating them again

[melnc]

If you were really happy being single, you wouldn't even be asking this question.
Truth is, I think you're scared... scared of ending up disappointed again, just like before. I don't know what you've been through, but I know that fear isn't the same as fate.
You're not doomed, you're just hurt.

[Asker]

No I'm not hurt

[Asker]

Men are a disappointment and waste of time

[Asker]

I've been this way 15 years

[Asker]

If I truly wanted someone I would have done it years ago

[melnc]

Can't argue with that if your sample size is one. But generalizing half the species? That's not logic, that's just lazy math.

[melnc]

"If I truly wanted someone I would have done it years ago"
Cool. So we agree you've had years to pick better. That's on you, not us.

[Asker]

It's not about picking better - I'm not interested in picking at all

[Asker]

Why can't I post a question without it being personal

[Asker]

I didn't generalize I said collectively men are disappointments - that's an opinion

[Asker]

I chose myself best decision

[melnc]

Say less. You're not picking anyone.. cool, your choice. You said men collectively are disappointments.. that's your opinion, not a generalization. You chose yourself, best decision. Respect. But when you put that out there, people will react. Not 'cause you're wrong 'cause opinions hit close to home. Post what you want, just don't act surprised.

[Asker]

I'dc some people believe in love I don't

[Asker]

Not with men anymore - I stopped looking for that and found it with myself

[melnc]

You're not obligated to want love, men, or anything else. If you found peace with yourself, that's the whole point. No one's here to convince you otherwise live your life. Though people who are truly over something usually don't bring it up this much. Just saying.

[Asker]

I mean this is my first post in 15 years

[Asker]

Lol..

[melnc]

Long time. Glad you're happy, that's what counts. Just funny you picked today to break the silence

[Asker]

I mean there's so much going on between the genders - I refuse to date in this generation

[Asker]

What I'm talking about is nothing new

[Asker]

Maybe things will get better in the future for both genders , but I don't follow these systems and how people view relationships

[melnc]

You can't control the chaos, and you definitely can't control people, that's just facts. The future isn't labeled good or bad it's neutral. Your lens does the labeling. Same world, different eyes. You're right about the mess, but don't let it blind you. And hey.. I'm not here to convince you. Just offering a different angle. Take it or leave it.

[Asker]

I'm not here to control anyone - I wish people would understand that who think they can control what people do with their love life and if they choose to stay single or date

[Asker]

I'm good at dating that's what it is ! No desire or interest, but it doesn't mean I hate men - I'm. not looking to submit or be controlled by another human being and love my freedom without restrictions

[Anonymous]

Possibly. I think most people exile themselves through their choices.

Rather than say those people are "meant" to be single. I'd say there standards and choices exile themselves from ever finding anything real or lasting. And that's probably just as well, for everybody.

[abc3643]

Yes, I believe so. That said, they might find real love and be denied a future with that person. So, it's the destiny to be single that is the important part.

[Nikki1989]

Life is what you make of it. Sadly, too many people will seek out excuses to use as a defence mechanism for their failures.

[Asker]

I think most of these men are a disappointment lack of effort etc

[Asker]

I'm not settling sorry

[Vegasrunner]

Lot of women are struggling with this. Part of the problem is most women dont qualify for the caliber of man they want Women have high standards, but dont bring anything to the table to retain a high value man

[Asker]

I'm self employed and a business owner I couldn't date a man who is making less than me and isn't college educated

[Asker]

I'm not in the dating market , but I feel for the women that are - as for me I know finding a man who's on my level would never happen

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Yep, thats exactly the point. You led with things men dont care about. So now you have to try to attract a man of higher status and more importantly figure out how to retain him while bringing nothing of value to him.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker You find a man on your level everyday its just that you have an over inflated sense of where that level is.

[Asker]

No I'm now open to dating women who are more evolved and financially together over men - I meet women all the time who own businesses and own homes ( This is what happens when men don't evolve) no I'm not settling or gonna deal with a broke man - most of the men aren't college educated nor financially stable

[Asker]

I don't do 50/50 with men, I don't date men who aren't college educated, I don't talk to men who lack financial stability and emotional maturity

[Asker]

Most men don't qualify - like I said I'm open to women or staying single

[Asker]

Men aren't the prize women are - the issue you men are to transactional and you place value on what women can do for you rather than how can we benefit each other together

[Asker]

Average men should date average women - women like me will date a woman , staying single, or hope for a high value man

I choose women 🏳️‍🌈

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Lol good luck with that as we know Lesbian relationships have the highest breakup rate, proving that even women dont want to deal with women.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Thats unfortunate to hear that your choices are limited but it doesn't really matter. there's way more options out there for what men want especially in today's dating market.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Yes a lot of women will be stuck in your predicament.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Nah, the fact that you believe most men dont qualify clearly proves that the ones who do are the prize, and every women is chasing them. This means there's a ton of competition for you. Outside of sex and reproduction most women can't benifit most men.

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker Women dont want to date Average men. in my opinion Average mem shouldn't date at all. They should focus on raising their status, once they do they can choose any woman they want. Good news is they have a long time to do this. Unfortunately women only have short shelf life to get what they want.

[Asker]

Women like me understand what's going on - I built a life that doesn't include a man and willing to ride this wave solo

[Asker]

I no longer care what men want or what makes them happy I'm out for myself

[Asker]

I'm interested in dating women and traveling with single women - I'm. at peace single

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Nice. Good for you. Its great that you understand men aren't going to choose a woman like you.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Dont feel bad most women dont care what men want. Thats why I advise men to be just as selfish as women if they want to have success.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Good for you. I hope you stay single forever.

[Asker]

Sounds like you're hurt or something or making it seem like it's a bad thing to be single - it's not that I've been married and had kids - I'm never doing it again/ I don't care that men aren't picking me as you say , but in the last 16 years men continue to chase me so someone wanted me. I didn't want any of them because I'm not scarifying anything else for a man or woman not in this country and not in this day and time with this generation.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Thats simply a shaming tactic women use when they are unable to argue a point. Most women make decisions based on feelings so they try to project those feelings to other. Facts are I clearly support your decision to give up as I don't think you have what it takes to attract a HV man anyway.

[Asker]

I'm not arguing I'm simply telling you IDC what men want and don't care about your standards of what you want in a woman - I'm useless and unavailable for you men / I don't have a dream man not seeking a man on a romantic level - I deal with you men on a business level ( I'm self employed) beyond that I don't want to date , have sex , get married , have anymore kids, or deal with you men on any level

[Asker]

I don't care about a high value man - I'm not seeking a man at all and have been single by choice 16 years (most of my life ) .. I'm not in the dating pool I removed myself and focused on myself , career, and finances

[Asker]

Good luck to you men according to you men women like me hit the wall pass 30 - for me that was 8 years ago / I just want to meet single women , travel, make money, and live in my house in peace

[Asker]

Furthermore I've been single most of my life so I'm not losing anything

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Why do you feel the need to tell me this?

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Yea around 30 is when women hit the wall.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Yea you'll probably always be single

[Asker]

I don't know wtf you're talking about you're making it seem like I'm out here wanting relationships with men and I don't - I wish you men would stop bothering me if anything

[Asker]

I've been married and had kids so no I've never always been single , but now I am

[Asker]

All it takes is one time with you men

[Asker]

My ex husband was and will be the last man and I don't think I can find a man better than him in this generation - you men are hopeless

[Asker]

I'm better off single

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Its ok that you dont know most women dont understand relationships. If I haven't been clear, I will try to be against. IdGAF if you ever have a relationship, you're one random woman, there's millions of millions of young women available why would anyone care about one?

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Yea its tough for a single woman with kids to get a HV Guy

[Asker]

So go get these young women instead of trying to shame me with these stupid red pill talking points as if I care what men want - eventually those young women are going to get old lol - I guess hit the wall too lol women are waking up to you mens bs I did 16 years ago

[Asker]

3i don't want any of you men lol IDC if you're high value or not haha

[Asker]

I've completely removed myself from you menall together

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Not sure why you feel shamed. Personally I do go get young women, and as they age out just replace them with younger women.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker That is irrelevant because it doesn't seem as men want you

[Asker]

I know what you men do it's nothing new just recycle , rewash, repeat etc etc.. I understand men nature and don't care what tf you men want

[Asker]

I use to be 20 18 years ago lol

[Asker]

I don't care that men don't want me - lol now you're projecting and threatened because I don't care that men are chasing me lol I have peace not being bothered by you men

[Asker]

I make my own money , have my own home, and lay in my bed in peace

[Asker]

I do what I want as a single free woman not tied or chained to a man

[Asker]

I see you men and don't

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Again men recognize the shaming tactics immature women use. If you didn't care that men dont chase you, you wouldn't be engaging in this conversation.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Men dont care about a women's money

[Asker]

I have nothing , but time you're just proving how weak and small you are - my choice in remaining single by choice is valid

[Asker]

Any woman dealing with the average American man is a fool

[Asker]

I also don't care about you men's money, validation, time , existence, or energy

[Asker]

We can cohabit without dealing with each other ROMANTICALLY

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker Thats simply a coping method used to deal with the fact the men you want dont want you.

[Vegasrunner]

@Aaker Then there are a lot of female fools, as most women deal with American men.

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker Im not sure why you think it matters if you care or not.

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker Lol, no man is going to live with a women w/out getting sex, women dont provide any other value to men.

[Asker]

Why would I live with a man? If men want sex they should hire a SW

[Asker]

I use toys for self pleasure

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker only a loser hires a sex worker when there's thousands of woman ready to give it up for free.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker Im sorry to hear that.

[Asker]

IDC lol just glad it's not my body being used by men

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker TBH men dont really care about a random girl their not banging. As long as we can keep getting laid, by someone where happy, and there's billions of womwn out there.

[Asker]

Good I forgot I was even chatting with you because I was too busy working and making money

[Asker]

IDC what you men want and only deal with you guys when I want too and you have to be a special type of man

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker Good for you. You're going to need it sense you can't get a HV man.

[HighValue]

Women past 30 won't get the good quality men interested in her or to take her seriously so she may as well give up or become lesbian.

[Asker]

I'm not interested in women - I've chosen my career and it's not a flex to deal with a man or be married

[Asker]

Women like me are in our businesses and making money

[Asker]

We are not in the dating market

[AngryCarl3]

It's said there's someone for everyone. If so, then the odds are still against ever finding that person.

[Asker]

Nope I gave up on men a decade ago no regrets

[Anonymous]

If you are happier, then stay that way but it’s not because it is meant to be, but because it is your choice

[Asker]

I don't believe the right person is out there - kinda gave up in that department

[Asker]

Yet when I explain this to men they don't get it -

[Opinion Owner]

They just complain our standards are too high and are happy to blame us. Many of them are very simple.

[Asker]

I'm done with it all rather stay CELIBATE and single men repulse me nowadays - I want nothing to do with them

[Opinion Owner]

That’s fair. Everyone has a limit on how many bad experiences they care to put up with.

[Asker]

I don't hate them I want to preserve the little peace I have

[Asker]

Yes my limit is over

[TonyMetal___1986]

You are what you do and what you make, it's meant for you only if you surrender...

[Asker]

I have given up

[TonyMetal___1986]

Don't... there's always hope...

[Asker]

No - dating is terrible and so are suitors nowadays

[Anonymous]

Relationships are not for everybody. But on the other hand maybe you're standards are way too high

[Asker]

Nope most of the men aren't doing ten are minimum and I don't settle

[canamlusciouslad73]

Hopefully not.

[Asker]

I think so I can finally stop being unhappy with the suitors

[Anonymous]

It seems like it, but I remain hopeful.

[leviopperman]

it's over

[Asker]

It is

[MasterKS]

Happy Single.