Are these dating yellow flags enough to walk away from this guy?

[Anonymous]

I met a guy a week ago. After I told him I don't like to text, he calls me daily, which I like, but he isn't asking me questions to get to know me. He's asking superficial questions like when's your birthday, what movies do you like. He talks a lot about himself; his likes, dislikes, his plans (he has a lot but no real follow through), and he talks a lot about me being his type physically. I usually ask more questions to understand him more deeply. I'm not seeing that from him, so it makes me question his intentions. When he talks about himself, mention things about myself or what I hope others would do. Then I noticed that he in a later call he incorporates my comments as if its he something that he believes or supports.

We went on our first date and he repeatedly commented on how I looked. We took a walk in a park and he wanted to hold hands, but I didn't feel comfortable because I'm still getting to know him. He told me how he likes to cuddle, give massages and asked me if I'm into that. In my mind, it's a bit early to talk about that, but I told him I like them when I'm in a relationship with someone. He asked what kind of guy I'm looking for or what type of relationship I'm seeking. My response was I want to get to know a person before I determine if he's what I'm looking for. I focus on behaviors and actions.

Because I'm asking more questions, I'm hearing yellow flags and I reverse searched his number. It's a text me now number. I also found another number that's listed as tmobile.

[Anonymous]

Ladies, please step outside of your brain. Think. A lot of men are this way because we’re not wired this way. That’s like telling a girl to ask questions about something men do that she has no clue about. Just because you think, act or respond a certain way to things doesn’t mean we do. Maybe he’s nervous. Maybe he’s never really been on a date. A lot of women say men aren’t “emotionally intelligent,” but the truth is a lot of you aren’t either. You can’t see it from his point of view. The pressure of having everything fall on you as the man to make things perfect so that she will want to continue to see you. Those are the times when women say he was being weird, awkward, etc. He’s being vulnerable in that situation, that isn’t really a normal thing for men. So when you dismiss him because he was “weird” you probably missed out. I don’t mean weird as in he was smelling your chair after you stood up. Weird as in he couldn’t articulate things, fumbled his words, said something that was stupid because he was nervous. Most things for men are superficial because growing up most of us weren’t allowed to express our feelings other than anger. Not just by other men in our lives but women as well.

[Asker]

I continued to chat with him and I made the decision to end communication. I understand what your saying, however, I'm the yellow flags are piling up. If I feel annoyed by his behavior this early, it's not going to improve juat because he's possibly nervous or inexperienced. He's showing me his character and I believe him.

[Opinion Owner]

And that’s your choice. Nothing wrong w that.

[slatyb]

You aren't comfortable. Pay attention to that feeling and stop seeing him.

[Asker]

Yes, I agree. It's too early to hear multiple yellow flags. Thanks

[Anonymous]

It seems like he is acting normal, but you don't seem to like him much so far. Maybe give him more time if you think there might be something there.

[Asker]

I don't believe it's normal to talk about cuddling and massages the first week of getting to know someone. Also, the flattery is obsessive and I decided to end it.

[Opinion Owner]

That's fair.

[Alex-Snow]

It sounds like he is new or insecure to dating. He obviously wants sex if he keeps commenting on your looks. How old is the guy?

[Asker]

He's 35... I think you're right about the sex thing because during a call, we had a difference of opinion and he told me he wants a soft woman who doesn't argue or who tries to win arguments. We weren't arguing. We just didn't share the same perspectives. He ended the call saying I just want to cuddle and and hug. Just it's a wrap.

[Alex-Snow]

I think you can do way better.

[Anonymous]

You mean you stalking him? Yeah, he may want to walk away

[Asker]

🤣 you obviously don't understand the definition of stalking. Please locate a dictionary